Friday, April 1, 2011
The String Of Nonsense Continues Here At Blessourhearts
Lord what a morning. It started out perfectly fine and I feel markedly better. My hips aren't singing much of anything and the sun is full-out, shouting at the world to wake-up! wake-up! dance-about!
Or something. Hell, I don't know what the sun is saying. Probably something more like, "Oh, I'm so hot. Damn. I'm so hot."
Then I went to make a call to my mother. No dial tone. Check the plug. Fine. Check the phone out in my office. Dead. Check the internet. Fine. Plug the phone into that line. No dial tone. How does that happen? WTF?
Call the Century Link people on my cell phone which requires me going outside and finding the exact right spot to get reception. There's a huge cell phone tower about two blocks from here, if there were blocks in Lloyd, which there are not but that's obviously not MY phone's tower. Get the automated repair line. Of course. Go through various and sundry menus. Press one. Press two. No stay-on-the-line to speak to a customer representative. Uh-huh. They got rid of that shit. So now some one should be here within 24 hours or within the next working day. This is Friday. What does this mean?
Well, for right now it means I have internet but no phone.
PERFECT! and fine with me.
So what does it mean when you dream that a young girl abandons her baby to you and that baby has a turtle shell and is starving and your dog removes the baby from the turtle shell and you just stand around and watch as this tiny baby (about the size of a fountain pen) stumbles around and you just wait for it to die?
I'm hoping it means that I'm thinking about Pearl and not that I'm a woman who would let her turtle-baby die. Pearl is up this morning and skinnier than ever and I suppose I'm just waiting for her to die. Not sure about the turtle shell thing. But she ate some and came over for some attention and I stroked her head and told her I loved her. "Now go for the light," I'd tell her but she's deaf and it would be a waste of time.
My poor old turtle-baby.
I read an article in Esquire Magazine about Matthew McConaughey which made me like him (dude can THROW a party) and started reading another article about a guy named Eric Schadt who is a scientist studying genes and who rides a motorcycle to work and always wears tennis shorts and a white polo shirt and his parents are extremely Evangelical Christian who think that his work is Of The Devil and he might just be one of the smartest people in the world and he might change the world and, boy. I don't understand any of it but I am going to finish that article and I wish I was smarter.
I am fifty-six years old and I learn something new every day but it's usually on the order of how to determine if eggs are fresh without cracking them or that chickens eat the peas growing on the fence and believe me- none of the things I learn are going to change the world although they might change how and where I plant my peas which should not be on the fence where the chickens can get at them.
I've been reading the blog, Reflections of a Grady Doctor and if you haven't been there, you should go. This woman IS changing the world and besides that, she is an amazing writer. AMAZING. So I'm going to quit here and tell you to go there and I'm going to wish you a happy Friday and if I learn anything new today, I'll report in.
Meanwhile, don't try to call me, it won't work any more than me telling Pearl to go towards the light. I'll just be here with Zeke and the rest of the critters, sitting in the sun.
Maybe going for a walk, doing some weeding, checking out the newest blooms in the yard.
And here's some orange fungus. I think it's fungus. Eric Schadt would probably know.
All right. Here's something I just learned and should pass on for sure:
DO NOT GOOGLE-IMAGE FOR "FUNGUS." Especially if you are made ill at the sight of horribly diseased toenails.
Oh god. I have to go wash my eyeballs with bleach now.
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Thanks. Grady Doctor is amazing.ReplyDelete
your post made me smile :)
I "bookmark" new blogs to read and I will take some time to read this one and catch up on others.ReplyDelete
Those lessons on life...well sometimes the lessons are new and may not seem important (but they are!), and sometimes our lessons are repeated (because we need to relearn them).
I happen to like your lessons on chickens and home because they don't scare me. Well...maybe when you talk about the snakes.
Pearl...she is sniffing her life from today and days gone by...soaking up sun rays and pats and hugs.
I am a big old hot mess today, and tending the chickens sounds heavenly. Hi-ho, back to work I go =( Love you.ReplyDelete
Jeannie- Oh. She is.ReplyDelete
Ellen- I don't like scary things either. Trust me.
And Pearl- oh, she is fine. She's been out, watching me weed.
SJ- It IS heavenly. I'm glad it's Friday for you.
"Damn. I'm so hot." made me bust out laughing.ReplyDelete
Zeke looks quite elfin, with that enigmatic smile.ReplyDelete
Zeke's very cute sitting there in the sunshine. Your house is such a peaceful place.ReplyDelete
And, whenever I think of fungus-toenails, I think of my neighbor. She couldn't stop herself (nor do I think she even thought twice about it) one day from telling me all about her fungus toenails (and showing them to me). At the time, I just nodded my head, wondering if I'd ever get my appetite back- and I did. It's never gone for long...
Wow! Thanks for the kind words, Ms. Moon! As my patients at Grady would say: 'preciate ya!ReplyDelete
Oh, and that part about the sun saying "Damn, I'm so hot" made me laugh out loud, too. You're wonderful and hilarious. I'm looking forward to reading more!
DTG- But isn't that what the sun would say? Dang. It's hot.ReplyDelete
A- He's like a little werewolf-elf. Yep. That's Zeke exactly.
Nicol- God. I'm sorry about your neighbor. I hope her toenails weren't as bad as the ones on Google image. Really.
gradydoctor- Honey, I got a big crush on you. I hope that's all right. And I 'preciate you too. Big time.
Those look like chanterelle mushrooms to me. Hard to tell from the photo but chanterelles are delicious. They do crop up in woodsy settings in spring around here.ReplyDelete
Glad that Pearl is okay. I have been reading about Patrick, the poor dog that was starved to near death. Dogs have souls too.
Dear Mary, I hope I learn something new each day, even if it's not as practical as yours.ReplyDelete
Thank God you still have the internet! I start hyper ventilating as soon as anything goes wrong with mine. Have a great day, love C xx
Zeke is so damn cute.ReplyDelete