Monday, April 18, 2011

Time Lapse

The Confederate Jasmin is blooming, the tiny whirled petals like a pinwheel and the unopened blossoms a spiral, closed tight and wouldn't it be something to be able to sit still long enough to watch one open? Remember when we were kids (okay, us old people) and they'd show us all that time-lapse photography of flowers opening? Man, that was some high-tech shit.

Do they still do time-lapse photography? Do they still have the AV students who bring in that squeaky cart with the film projector on it and pull down the screen in front of the classroom and turn off the lights and show films?

Oh. I doubt it.

Those films never ran right. Something was always happening to screw it all up. But it was a break in routine and as such, GREAT!

Why were the AV guys always guys? Did you ever see an AV girl? I didn't.

Anyway, the Confederate Jasmin is a perfumed whore of a blossom. She does not put on her scent with discretion. She pours it out of the bottle, she covers herself in it, then walks naked but for her white petticoat in the streets and knocks people over, one after another. Lays 'em out flat. They don't know what hit them when she walks by.

Do you see that little lizard? I don't know how he stays conscious with all that scent around him. But he does. He posed for the picture (if you click on it, you'll enjoy it more) and then scurried away, no time for such silliness. Bugs to catch, etc.

The figs are making tiny fruitlings.

I doubt we'll get a total of twenty even though the tree has gotten huge. Not enough sun. The story of our life here in Lloyd. The great oaks and the pecans snatch it all up and refuse to share.

But the loquats are doing well, despite that.

Loquats are a funny fruit. They have a large, very smooth seed in the middle which makes them impractical in some ways. If you have the patience you could, I suppose, cut the seed out and make preserves of them. I don't have the patience. We shall just eat them off the tree and spit the seeds out. They're a little sweet, a little bitter. The chickens will probably like them. And I SWEAR, after they're done this year, I am going to cut that fucking tree down and have Mr. Moon pull the stump and I'm going to plant a mulberry. He's going to fight me on this one because he doesn't want any tree there at all because it blocks the small amount of light that the garden gets. But I'm going to put my hands on my hips and say, "Look. I am an old Southern Woman and I want a mulberry tree! I deserve a mulberry tree!"

We shall see how that goes.

And as I sit here, the morning goes and I have a lot to do and places to go and library books to check in and check out and clothes to wash and frankly, I could just sit on one porch after another, watching things open like flowers and bird beaks, being amazed as I always am that I get to live here which is like living in one of those museums where they've moved old houses to show modern people how people used to live and set up a garden and and a chicken coop and it's just like that here, except that I do live here, really and truly, and if there's one time-lapse thing I'd love to see it would be a century-and-a-half time-lapse movie of this house from the first beams set in place to support it to right now with me sitting on the porch.

Wouldn't that be something?

Oh yes it would.

Happy Monday, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I always laugh when I go to the Junior Museum, because the olde timey farm they have set up there is newer than your house!

  2. it does sound really rather fabulous ....sitting on your porch!!

  3. I love that time lapse stuff. If they watch it in school now, it's probably on YouTube.

    Jasmin always stops me in my tracks. I've tried to grow it hear but the critters ate it down to nothing in just a couple days.

  4. I tried to to grow it *here*. Freaking homonyms always get me.

  5. DTG- You know what the Jr. has that I want? One of those hand pumps. I still don't have one. And I want one! And maybe a donkey.

    Young At Heart- Trust me. It is.

    Stephanie- I hear that the dear love it. Whoops! I mean "deer." Haha!

  6. Hullo Ms. Moon...I have read you at SB's blog, but this is my first time here.

    I have mulberry trees--stand your ground. Every woman should have one. But I have plenty of light for my it might be a tad different.

    Today I went down to the road and cut lilacs for my kitchen table. The smell is orgasmic.

    Toodles. I'll be back

  7. That is a great shot of the lizard. I'll have to show that to my grandson. He'll love it! I have two trees loaded with loquats in my yard and the neighborhood kids usually get to them before I do.

  8. Well, I will have you know my darling Mary Moon, that I was an A/V GIRL, albeit the only one, at Hicksville High School in Hicksville, Long Island, New York (don't laugh!)(the same high school that Billy Joel went to - he was a one or two grades above me - but we had the same chorus teacher).
    Wow - weren't Lon, Lis and Gabe breathtaking Saturday! Love, Jan
    PS - GREAT picture of Elvis!

  9. WAIT NO - I MADE A MISTAKE. I was an A/V geek at Hicksville JUNIOR High School. In high school I was too busy being one of those wierd drama club folks (but the rest was accurate). OK, now I've got to go back to studying my script. (God, do times EVER change?)

  10. How weird that you mentioned time lapse photography, Kathy just posted this one the dirt nerds unite Facebook page:
    Gotta run, sneaking at work.
    Happy Monday beautiful!

  11. ugh, link didn't work, it's a time lapse camera for your garden!

  12. I was an AV girl. Was I the only one? I also ran the camcorder at all the foot ball games, which meant I had to be there early so I got to ride with the foot ball team. The cheerleaders were so jealous. I met my high school sweet heart on that bus.

  13. Back in my day, we still had the AV guy. And film strips.

    But I'm 30 now, MM. I am very old =) =)

  14. I think that there is just powerpoint these days and maybe some weird sexual education DVD's. You are right--the old movies never ran well on that rickety reel. My old high school got creamed by a tornado on Saturday--knocked down part of the school. Remember the film strips? Those were interesting.

    Do you have a recipe for fig preserves? The golden Italian fig has fruit for the first time ever!

  15. Figlings!

    Never had a loquat. never heard of one til now...

  16. Akannie- And I'll be visiting you. Please come by anytime. You are always welcome!

    Lois- I'd let my neighborhood kids eat my loquats but they're probably afraid of Elvis.

    Jan- I should have known you'd be the exception to that rule! That's so awesome. Billy Joel, huh? I'll be darned.

    Bethany- Maybe I need one of those.

    Nicol- They're so cool. As long as I've lived in Florida (mostly all my life) I am still fascinated by them.

    Terena- SWEET! Love it.

    SJ- That's hard to believe but I believe it.
    And you are NOT old. You're a baby.
    A smart one, but still...

    Syd- I remember once a movie just burned up right there. It was awesome! And yes, film strips. God, how boring were they?
    I'm sorry your school got blown away. Was anyone hurt?
    And yes, I have a recipe for fig preserves. In fact...

    Jo- It's not exactly the sort of fruit you'd bother to ship and sell.

  17. Dearest Mary, I'd be very happy sitting on your porch.

    I adore the smell of jasmine, mine's gone crackers and pulled the fence down. I need to cut it back.

    A mulberry tree would be lovely xx

  18. Christina- Jasmine sure will pull your fence down. And it would be so very nice to sit on the porch with you.

  19. Glad you pointed out the lizard. I am the least observant motherfucker in the world. I tried to be a journalism student for awhile. MASSIVE FAIL.

    I wanted to stay at home today and just sit with the cats and dog and listen to the rain come down. Why don't they pay us for the GOOD STUFF in life? Goddammit.


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