Monday, September 30, 2024

From Cats To Catastrophes


I swear, we have a new cat. I will always grieve Jack and remember him with such great fondness for his sweet ways with us- his head boops and the way he'd pat us with his paw when he wanted more love, his noisy purr, his funny little meows- but Maurice is absolutely changed without the constant threat of ambush and danger every second of her life. She has slept with us every night since the night of the hurricane and she is always still right there with me when I wake up. I think she gets up when Glen does and follows him to the kitchen but when she's taken care of whatever business needs taken care of, she comes and gets back in bed with me, then waits for me to get out of the bathroom and follows me to the kitchen to get my coffee. She invites our petting and mostly does not even try to scratch or bite us. 

Mostly.

She'll pretend-bite me and then she'll lick the place where she set her teeth on my skin. It's a little scary but not like it used to be when we knew for sure that if she acted like she was going to bite us, she was going to bite us. 

So I've been enjoying watching this metamorphose take place, seeing how she's learning to trust, to not be as quick to dart and run at any sort of sudden movement, to be able to relax and be calm. 
It really is like we have a new cat. 

I haven't gotten any real news about the Black Mountain family today. I've been almost obsessively watching videos of what's going on up in that area and in Tennessee and it's heart-wrenching and it's horrifying and it's insane and it's unbelievable. That's the word I keep using. Unbelievable. 
In so many of the videos, people are standing there saying things like, "Oh my god, the house is moving," and sure enough an entire house with water halfway to the roof just comes loose from its moorings and slowly starts to drift as if it had suddenly taken a notion to go visit other lands. Same with trucks and busses and cars. I think that the people who are witnessing all of this are having their entire perception of reality shattered. Houses are supposed to stay where they are built. Busses are supposed to stay where they are parked unless moved by a driver. Bridges are supposed to span creeks and little rivers. Roads are supposed to continue on to the next town and the next and the next. The grocery store is supposed to be where you left it. The trees are supposed to stay where they were planted. The giant boulders are supposed to remain seated where they have been cradled for hundreds if not thousands of years. The creeks and rivers are supposed to stay within the confines of their beds. Your yard is supposed to stay in your yard. Waterfalls are supposed to amaze and delight, not shoot out with such force that trees and rocks are taken out, shaken loose, and sent on their way down the river. 

How can human minds even accept the reality of any of this? 
As I said, unbelievable. The trauma of the survivors is going to be with them forever. I think of the children and how their world has so suddenly and without warning completely come undone. 

Well, aid is getting through, I see, but there are so many people unaccounted for and so many people who need food, water, medications, oxygen, shelter, and all the things that humans need just to live. 

Meanwhile, here in Lloyd, the power came back on around 9:30 last night. "Hot damn!" I texted my across-the-street neighbor. I am sure everyone slept better. I saw Tom today as his power was not yet back on and he needed to charge his phone. He is sleeping in his Tiny House and it did fine during the storm, staying right where it had been set and tied down. He said that he'd seen power trucks on his road and was hoping that they'd get his electricity back on soon. 

I worked in the front yard, picking up sticks and branches. 


I just have a little more to do in that area. As I was working, Harvey rode by on his bike and gave me a big hello. "You okay?" I yelled at him as he pedaled on. "Yeah!" he said. 
Very good to know. 

The firespike is coming along with its blooming.


My new cat Maurice supervised my work from the swing porch. 


I think she may actually be keeping watch for potential dangers to my safety like wolves and giant armadillos and Jehovah's Witnesses. 

As always, thank you for being here. For coming along with me as I lead this life. I will never not wonder why anyone is interested in what I have to talk about but I sure am grateful. 
As I am for so many things. 

Love...Ms. Moon


Sunday, September 29, 2024

Just A Little Bit


Today the birthday boy is August. His mama made him a crown-like head piece announcing that fact. I talked to him a little while ago and he is having a good day. He wanted to go to breakfast at a cafe down the street from where they live and so it was.


Our darling boy. I can't really take in the fact that it was nine years ago that Jessie so powerfully and gracefully gave birth to that sweet boy. She was, and is, a goddess. How that boy has been loved! 
Besides breakfast out, he had two friends over to jump on the trampoline and watch videos and eat truly yummy party food like pigs-in-the-blanket, Cheetos, and cake and ice cream. I asked Jessie if she'd gotten Juicy Juice which is what I always got for my kids' parties. She said had not. 
"Did you learn nothing from me?" I asked her. She laughed and said that she had and she had considered it but decided not to. 
Oh well. Other than that, she's the perfect mother. 

The update on the mountain family is that they are all safe and sound but have no power and no real way to get down the mountain for supplies like, oh- food.
I know that Vergil's mother puts up a lot of food that she grows and so does his sister but with four adults and three kids, they're going to need more than that pretty soon. Like I said yesterday, they are strong and resourceful and smart and I'm sure they will be fine but it's like they've been kicked back a hundred years but without the resources of that lifestyle. I know they can cook on the fire and I'm not sure about water. Their water source is the creek that runs beside the house but I'm sure there must be some sort of system to pipe it in and filter it. Vergil's stepfather was hiking down the mountain the last I heard, to check and see how things are going and to hopefully bring supplies back. 

Meanwhile, Vergil is doing all he can to organize help and to arrange communication from here in Florida. 
It's going to take relief services quite awhile to make and execute plans to help all the people who need it. 

Y'all, I'm doing about five things at once as I am writing this and I need to concentrate on a few other things so I'm going to cut this short. We are fine although Lloyd still doesn't have power and as our generator-powered air conditioner is keeping my house cool and I have internet and lights I am feeling massive guilt. 
Also? Extreme gratefulness but I sure do wish the power would come back on for my neighbors. 

And that's enough. Here's a flower.


Love...Ms. Moon

Saturday, September 28, 2024

The Good, The Bad, And The Unbelievably Catastrophic


Let's start out with the good news, shall we?

There was a belated and early birthday celebration for Owen, Lily, Vergil, and August. We met up at a Mexican restaurant in Tallahassee with an outdoor eating area and since the weather is quite tolerable right now, as to heat and humidity, it was pleasant. This is not the greatest picture in the world but it's hard to get us all in there. Jessie took the picture so I took one of her later when she was doing a little dancing to the Muzak and Lily posed too. 


Gibson appears to be himself. 

Here's Owen pretend-blowing out the candles on his birthday cookie. 




How handsome is that kid? 
And here's a shot of all the cousins.


We had a very good time but you may notice that Vergil is not in any of the pictures. This is because his world has just been shaken to its core by the damage Hurricane Helene has done to western North Carolina, specifically Black Mountain where his family lives and has lived for many, many years. Vergil and Jessie have land there and are in the process of building their own house. 
Were in the process. 
All of western NC has been hit very, very hard. Unbelievable flooding. Check out some of the footage that's coming out of there. It's nothing short of catastrophic. Entire sides of mountains are sliding down, taking everything down with them. This is the sort of natural disaster that Vergil figured could never happen on the mountain. The kind that might happen in Florida, sure. You see videos of houses in Florida floating down the street all the time. But Asheville? Many of the roads in western NC have been washed out, making access impossible. Also, keeping people trapped and stranded where they are. Some of the little towns that we drive through on our way to our annual visits to North Carolina to hang out with Jessie and Vergil and the kids are simply destroyed. Here's a drone video of one of those little towns. This one is called Chimney Rock. 
I think of the beautiful house that we've stayed in for two summers that sits beside a bucolic, chuckling little creek that the boys like to play in and that we like to sit in to cool off. I am so afraid that the creek rose and took that house as well as the house the landlady lives in across the creek. I have texted her but gotten no answer. 
Vergil was finally able to talk to his family today. They could get a signal from the second floor of his mother's house. You know that Vergil is desperate to get up there to help and has gone completely into problem solving mode, figuring out different connections to help his family from here, different routes that he might take to successfully get there. Everyone in the family is okay but according to them, the mountain will never be the same again. I can't even imagine what that means. 

And here's a crazy thing- Vergil and Jessie were going to go to Black Mountain on Thursday for Vergil's birthday. That was their plan before the hurricane but things just got so crazy here with the coming storm and they ended up staying and I wished so desperately that they had been able to leave, to get out of harm's way. 
And if they had? 
I do not think I could have borne the fear I would have held for them, even though I know that Jessie and Vergil and his family are all very strong, incredibly resourceful, and genius-smart. And I know that's how Vergil feels and my heart breaks for him. 

**********************

Lloyd is still without power but our generator chugs on. It did shut down when we were in town but Glen thinks he has it figured out and it's running now. That man. He continues to amaze and delight me. 

Remember this from a few days ago? 


I got a FB message from John this morning. John is the one in the striped T-shirt who was our neighbor. We have reconnected via a FB group about Sebastian and Roseland. The message was so very sad. He told me that Mark, the tall kid there beside him, has died. Of all the children in this picture, Mark was the one I knew best because he was our preacher's son and also the son of my favorite ever in the world teacher and she and my mother were friends. Also, Mark lived in this area for many, many years and I would occasionally see him at the library where we would stop and talk and hug. He was the most gentle man. John said that according to Mark's brother, the cause of death was not identified which I find very strange. He has been cremated and his ashes will be scattered into the Sebastian River which would be a fine place to scatter mine too. I sort of can't believe he's gone and at the same time, I am not shocked. 

Well, so many things I could pray for right now if I prayed. All of the people who have been so devastated by Helene in Florida, Georgia, Tennessee, and North Carolina. I would pray for those who have lost everything and I would pray for those who were injured. I would pray for the souls of the over fifty people who died in the storm and I would pray for peace for their families. 
I would pray for Mark that his death was easy and peaceful and that people he loved and who loved him were at his side. 
But I don't pray. 
I swear to you, if I hear one more person talking about the power of prayer or see one more comment on FB about how prayer works because their god protected them and kept them safe, I'm going to lose it. What sort of a god would so arbitrarily grant safety to one person and not another, despite the fact that both prayed sincerely and fervently? What sort of god would even allow such a tragedy to occur? Yeah, yeah, sure, climate change and the ensuing natural disasters are all due to the actions and choices of  humans but what kind of a god creates a world and then creates a creature who has the eventual capability to destroy that world? 

But hey! In good news, Maurice has now slept with us two nights in a row. That girl is enjoying her status as the one and only cat in the house.

Everyone keep safe if you can.

Love...Ms. Moon







Friday, September 27, 2024

We Are Fine

 


Last night when the storm had made landfall a little east of here and the winds were impressive but not scary and we still had power, I decided that I was going to sleep in my own bed so Glen put that up in our bedroom window and I called it the "Decapitation Protection Curtain." 

And I went to bed and I slept as did my husband. 

We woke up to a most beautiful day, cooler, dryer, and totally sunshiny, 



and the only real damage that had been done was that a branch had gone through the wind shield on one of Mr. Moon's trucks. 


Lots of branches down but that's just a pain in the ass, not a tragedy. 

The power in Lloyd is still out but we have the generator which is a complete champ and although we lost internet and cell service this morning, we've just gotten them back which is why I am here. 

The worst thing is that Vergil's family on a mountain in North Carolina is stranded due to flooding and high winds from this very same storm. How could this even happen? Vergil, who's birthday is today, is so very distraught. 

Damn. 

But we here in North Florida are fine. Rachel and Hank are the only ones who lost power and they have gotten it back. We are so incredibly grateful and I have not yet had time to see what has happened to the rest of Florida, especially the counties east of here who have been hit and hit too hard three times within the last thirteen months. 

Thank all of you for your concern and sweet messages. And let us wish a very happy birthday to both Vergil and Lily. I think that ship may have sailed regarding Vergil's birthday and Lily had to be at work at 8:30 this morning but we are here. More tomorrow.

Love...Ms. Moon





Thursday, September 26, 2024

Before The Storm


Well, this is what it looked like in Lloyd at 5:45 p.m., September 26. Very little has been going on here today as applies to hurricane weather. We've had some drizzling but hardly a breath of a breeze has stirred those banana leaves. Or any other leaves by that matter. Other areas have received a great deal of rain and there is flooding in different parts of the state. 

I've spent all day in a sort of daze, thinking and overthinking our decision not to leave. As I texted my children, I have been operating on about 12% of my brain capacity. This is not a lie. I had an experience today that I've never had before which is that instead of walking into a room and wondering what in the world I came in there to do, I went to the kitchen, came back to what I'd been doing which was making my bed, and thought, "Why did I go to the kitchen?" I couldn't remember until I went back in there and saw Glen's water flask that he'd inadvertently left on his bedside table. Now I took the flask to the kitchen when I noticed it because I knew if I didn't, I'd forget it but hellfire, Martha- that was fucking weird. 

Once again I am disassociating and it's a good thing that I don't have to consciously tell myself to breathe because otherwise, I'd stop and probably die. I have hives in various places on my body which happens when I get stressed out but that's sort of a good thing because scratching the hives feels good and is somewhat of a distraction and at least ties me to my physical being. I've also had a stomach ache all day but that, too, is to be expected. 

I've spent a great deal of time today watching Rob Nucatola's updates on Facebook. The man is not mincing words or being overly optimistic about the chances of this storm making a last-minute turn and not hitting us. And, in fact, I just heard him say that yes, there is indeed a possibility that before it hits land, Helene might become a Category 4 storm which is...well, look- a Category 1 storm can beat the shit out of a place. But the GOOD NEWS is, Helene is moving fast and will be making landfall probably around 9 or 10 tonight but will probably have passed by 2 a.m. It's such a big storm that it'll take a while for the area of the winds to pass entirely. Does that make sense? 
No? 
I TOLD YOU- 12% BRAIN CAPACITY! 

All right. Here's a picture from the National Hurricane Center that I obviously must post.


No words. 

Mr. Moon spent most of the day doing good things. He took Tom some MRE's (Meals Ready To Eat) that they were distributing somewhere he was the other day. He grabbed a bunch for Tom and took them over there and helped Tom do a few things to tighten up his situation. He will be hunkering down in the Tiny House which, although not ideal, is a better option by far than his trailer. Glen also took our old portable generator over to Lily's with a few bottles of propane. It's not a big generator but it can keep their refrigerator running along with a few lights and some fans. He finished boarding up the windows here that he wanted to get done and put away some things that could become deadly flying missiles. And what did I do besides watch Rob Nucatola videos to get ready for the storm? 


Well, I made some chili crisp and chewy chocolate cookies. 

As one does. 

Don't ask me why. Well, I knew Glen would appreciate the cookies and I just felt compelled to make the chili crisp even though we have some in the refrigerator already. 

It is Owen's birthday. He'll never forget this one. Jessie and her family took him his present and they all had breakfast together. 


Cheerful group, right? I hear they really were all in a good mood and happy to see each other. 

Glen took our present to Owen and also Lily's birthday present when he took the generator. Lily and Vergil's birthdays are tomorrow, Billy's is the next day, and August's the day after that. 

I guess I'll go make our supper. I hope I remember how to turn the stove on. As I said yesterday, it may be a while after the storm passes before I can post but I will when I can. 

We're starting to get a few wind gusts and some more rain. 

Gonna be a hell of a night. 

Love...Ms. Moon
 

Wednesday, September 25, 2024

Come On, Helene, Let's Get This Shit Over With


All right. Now that my doctor's appointment is over, I can concentrate on storm anxiety. 
Jesus H. Christ but this has not been a good week. 

Dr. Zorn was as precious as ever. He has a new med tech working there who was also incredibly sweet and empathetic. I explained my extreme anxiety about doctor visits to him and told him, "I will probably cry. Don't worry." 
He tried his hardest to reassure me and was very kind and although this may be inappropriate, I have to say that he was a fine-looking young man and I was happy to hear that he has gotten into the FSU training program to become a P.A. I congratulated him on that. 
But yes, I was pretty much crying the whole time. 

Dr. Zorn buzzed in as he does. He approached me and put his hand out, grabbed mine, and sort of held it to his chest for a moment. I wonder if he has any idea how much that means to a patient like me? We got right into all the stuff- how I'd try to get off the HRT and how that really did not work at all and how I've been having days of fairly continual weeping and the feelings I've been having of uselessness and how reclusive I've become. He handed me the box of Kleenex and said, "Do you feel unappreciated?"
"NO!" I said without a second's thought because I most certainly do not. I know that my family appreciates me and that they love me too. It is not that. I have the most caring family I know of, from my husband on down to my grands. It's just... my stupid brain. And so he wants to increase one of my antidepressant meds and I agree with that. If it works, it works, if it doesn't, I'll stop doing it. He said my labs were fine and my blood pressure was...okay. And that's all the discussing we did on that. I asked him about his children and he told me the story of the birth of their last child which was one of the most frightening and traumatic experiences I could ever imagine. I mean seriously. And then we started talking about politics and I told him that had been a source of major anxiety for me. I will just say that he is aligned with me in that area. 
I sometimes wonder if he does not have these non-medical chats with me to make me feel less fearful at our appointments. Perhaps he just loves to talk. Whatever, it does help and I trust him with my care and I trust him with the care of my family. 

So I survived that but I feel wrung out. 

The storm is such a threat. The forecasts all still have it coming right here. It is a huge storm in terms of the area it takes up in the Gulf, which is just about all of it. It's been punishing Cozumel all day but I think it has finally passed them. It has just become an official hurricane but they're saying that by the time it travels the five hundred miles over the Gulf to get here, it will be a Cat 3, with some even saying a Cat 4. They have evacuated all the coastal areas west of here and there are far more people evacuating from Tallahassee than I think I've ever seen before. People are taking this seriously. Not only are schools closed tomorrow and Friday, but all of the Publixes are closing tomorrow which is a huge, big deal. We shall see what happens at the Waffle House. The hope is that the storm moves north quickly, thus having less time to strengthen even more over the warm waters and that when it gets here, it will hit and go. There are still variables that can absolutely change how things turn out. Rob Nucatola is saying that he thinks Helene will start affecting us tomorrow with winds and rain as the bands of the storm whirl and twirl around the eye and that it will make landfall in the early evening and hopefully, hopefully, be passing by midnight. 
A lot can happen between now and then. 
Glen is screwing plywood on the windows in the Glen Den as we speak so that we will have one room without danger of flying glass. 

It is raining now, just a slow drizzle. And this is how it starts. I am thinking that I will be able to post tomorrow although if I am able to post Friday, I will be very, very surprised. 

I'd ask for good thoughts and all that stuff but I don't believe in any of it so just get on with your lives and nature will takes its course. 

Big Love...Ms. Moon

Tuesday, September 24, 2024


Well, here's where we are at this point. Helene is now officially a tropical storm. There are quite definitive criteria for labeling these bitches as to whether there is a defined eye, the speed of the winds, and so forth. What you're seeing here is that it is now a tropical storm and as it passes the Yucatan (my beloved Cozumel!), it is predicted to become a Category 1 storm and then as it travels up the Gulf, it will get stronger and larger over the very warm waters there and by the time it hits Tallahassee area is predicted to be a Category 3.
This is a No-Joke storm.
Every computer model has the storm hitting land directly under Tallahassee whereas usually the different models have forecasted landfalls all over the place. Rob Nucatola looks somber although he keeps stressing that no one can really make an accurate prediction at this point based on the current status but to make our preparations now and Thursday's going to be a long day and, and, and...

And I have to tell you, I'm stressing out. We've got the generator, we have plenty of food, I'm not worried about any of that. We'll probably be without communication abilities for awhile because cell towers always come down as does internet service. I hate that because I won't know if my kids are okay nor will I be able to post here. But this is all part of it. Glen and Vergil are about to put some plywood up on a window that's only got plastic on it upstairs. 

To top it all off, my doctor's office called me today to say that they were cancelling Friday's appointments because there was a good chance that they'd have no power and could I come in tomorrow instead? I said I would and that's got me at least as stressed out as Helene which is ridiculous but there we are. So by this time tomorrow that will be done and we'll have a much more accurate view of what Helene's landfall is going to look like. 
I'm not sure why but that is not very reassuring. 

I've felt a little better today although I slept for two hours this afternoon. I NEVER do that. My stomach has been far more reasonable although I haven't eaten very much to be honest. I did a little looking around on the internet last night and there are various scholarly papers and studies showing that gastric problems can very well occur in long covid. This could explain a lot. My fatigue, my sweating, my continuing brain fog. Or, you know- I could be dying as I always say because I am one to always look on the bright side. 

When these storms come around I always think of how strange it is that one part of the country can be going through something so very, very frightening and potentially deadly while for the rest of the country it's just a blip on the news. We are all designed like this and probably for a good reason. If there are wildfires on the other side of the country and people are being forced to flee as their houses and dreams go up in smoke, I can only think, "Wow. That must be terrible." And then I move on. We do this with natural disasters and with far-away wars and with bloody revolutions. We read about them or watch them on TV and we wonder, "What should I make for supper?" 

Anyway, forget about this time tomorrow. Let's think about this time next week. Will all our trees be standing? Will our roof be intact? Will my children and grandchildren be safe and well? 

As always, I will report in tomorrow. There may be some days coming up that I can't but don't worry. We live in a house that has survived 165 years of hurricanes. 
Knock wood, knock wood, knock wood. 

Love...Ms. Moon

Monday, September 23, 2024

Not Very Cheerful


Everyone in Tallahassee is really paying attention to this potential storm. It's not even a Tropical Storm yet but there are headlines like, "We Are Not Going To Be Able To Avoid This One!" 

Ooh boy. 

The National Hurricane Center has this to say on their five o'clock advisory:

The system is expected to intensify into a major hurricane 
before it approaches the northeastern Gulf Coast on Thursday. While 
it is too soon to pinpoint the exact location and magnitude of 
impacts, the potential for life-threatening storm surge and 
damaging hurricane-force winds along the coast of the Florida 
Panhandle and the Florida west coast is increasing. Storm Surge 
and Hurricane Watches will likely be issued for a portion of that 
area tonight or Tuesday morning, and residents should ensure they 
have their hurricane plan in place.

Even Rob Nucatola is sounding serious about this although as always, he is reminding us that things can and do change drastically when a storm starts to form. 
Oh man. Sometimes I just fucking hate Florida. 

I went to Costco today and so many people were lined up to get gas that they had a guy out there directing the traffic. This always happens. I guess it's so that if we have to evacuate we'll have the gas to do it. I've never once evacuated for a hurricane (knock wood) but I can't say that it'll never happen. 

So let's not talk about that anymore. Let's talk about this picture.


It was posted on a Facebook group that I belong to about the history of Sebastian, Florida and nearby communities including Roseland. This picture was taken at the fourth birthday party for the little girl in the picture whose name was Gwenda. I didn't move to Roseland until I was five and so I wasn't even around the area when Gwenda turned four but she and I were in the same grade at Sebastian Elementary School when we reached school age. I was also in the same grade as the little darling on the left whose name was Bobby and the blonde-haired guy with the striped shirt whose name was John. The tall boy was a year ahead of us and his name was Mark and I knew him quite well as his mother and my mother were good friends and he was the son of our pastor. The little guy in front with no shirt and a lot of attitude was the brother of Bobby. 
I think it's so funny how every one of those children look like they've just been told that there will be no cake, ice cream, or Kool-Aid at this celebration and they are going to have to weed sandspurs out of the yard.

I've gotten a lot of enjoyment from looking at that picture. Except for Bobby's brother, I knew all of them quite well and played with them all. I even spent the night at Gwenda's house a few times. 

Well, that was exciting. 

I do not feel well. Something is going on with my stomach. It's been off for a few days. I don't have much of an appetite which is quite unusual for me and there are other issues which we shall not discuss. Another thing I can talk about with Dr. Zorn on Friday unless, of course, Tallahassee is shut down due to a hurricane. Meanwhile, I am making a sort-of chicken Avgolemono soup for our supper in hopes that it will treat me kindly. So I'm cutting this post short. 


There's Maurice who was practicing her super model moves yesterday evening. 

Here she is just now. 


She is definitely thinking about something. Probably about how she's going to attack me next. 

See you tomorrow. 

Love...Ms. Moon








Sunday, September 22, 2024

A Sunday Equinox


Yes another picture of a hurricane lily. This one popped up in a place where I'd never seen any before and that always baffles me. It happens frequently. How in the world do they spread? Anyway, I liked the way the picture shows the little slipper-shaped anthers and in the spirit of honesty, I had to look that up. I'm pretty sure I did a science project in the 7th grade entitled, "The Parts of a Flower" and thus, must have known what an anther was then but I have long since forgotten that little factoid and by next month, I will have forgotten it again.  

Hank and Rachel came over today to discuss wedding things. Those two have got this figured out! I mean, from the caterers to the flower arrangements to the DJ to the coloring sheets that they're going to put at a table with crayons for kids to color. "Dress the Bride and Groom!" "Decorate the Wedding Cake!" 
I am so impressed. 
Rachel had asked our group if anyone had a necklace that she might borrow for the wedding and I was happy to volunteer whatever I have. So while they were here we did a little survey of my necklaces and I do have some pretty ones. They are, for the most part, not very valuable in the monetary sense, but they are beautiful and have a lot of sentimental value for me. She liked one the best but took a few others to try on with her dress. The one that caught her eye right away is one that Lis gave me for my birthday this year. Lis has the best taste in jewelry and she knows me. This necklace has lavender stones and lavender is one of their colors. Hank wants me to fix him up a pocket square to go with his suit jacket. Something from his mama and I am pondering that. 
Y'all! This is going to be a big deal wedding! Please remind me to carry a handkerchief because there will be tears. 

Just as they were leaving, the Weatherfords showed up. They were on their way to the river to do some kayaking but stopped by so that Vergil could help Glen sight the crossbow or something like that. It is crossbow hunting season and so it is time for Vergil to fill their freezer. And Mr. Moon, too. Just as with fishing, there are very specific days that deer may be taken and there are doe days and buck days. Does are preferred for meat around here. While the fellas did the crossbow thing, Levon and August came inside to play games and wheedle treats out of me. I had opened the freezer for something and August said, "Do you have any treats in there?"
"Well, yes. I do," I said. I had bought some organic Healthy Choice fudge bars last week and I offered one to August and gave him one to take to his brother who was outside at the moment. A little while after that, Levon came in having eaten his fudge bar and asked if he could have a peanut butter, raisin, and honey sandwich because that is what he always gets at my house. I am very generous with the honey and he knows that. So I made him one of those on a cinnamon raisin English muffin and August realized he needed a toasted English muffin with butter on it so that, too, was prepared. 
What is a grandmother's house good for if not delicious treats? 
Jessie and I were talking a few days ago about how kids cling to tradition when they visit their grandparents' houses. They really do. Ask anyone, young or old, about visiting their grandparents and they will say something along the lines of, "When I went to my grandmother's house, she always..."
It's that always, whether it's the making of cookies or the telling of stories or the games they played together or the Purple Cows they had for dessert or something that even in adulthood is remembered and cherished. And honestly, I think that's as important to the grandparent as it is to the child. 
It is to me, at least, although sometimes certain traditions outwear their charm. For instance- is Maggie EVER going to sleep in her own bed when she spends the night? 
Ah, she's a pretty good bedmate. 

And then that little family left for the river and Glen and I have had a nice afternoon together. 
Jessie sent me some pictures from their outing. 


August is capable now of paddling his own small kayak. Sometimes he needs to be hooked up to the other one but he is getting strong. I love how Vergil trusts in his son's abilities and although he does not push them into things, he allows them to do the things that he knows they can do. I am sure he got this attitude from his own mother and I respect her so much for passing that along. A true gift. I often feel that I was too protective as a mother in some ways and that it did my children no favors although in other ways, I may not have been protective enough. 
That sort of sums up parenthood right there. 


How lucky we are to have such a beautiful river in our backyards. 


And at the end of the journey, you play in the sand. 

Summer is coming to an end, despite the heat we are still having. Today is the equinox and tomorrow the day will be the tiniest sliver shorter than the night. As beautiful as fall is, I always feel a shiver of sadness at its coming. I love the relief of it, the crisp blue-skyness of it, but it is such a definitive season, foretelling the time of darkness and endings. 

Here is a little bit of summer still hanging on here.



I wonder how long it will be before I post my first camellia picture? 

And here's another photo proclaiming the arrival of fall. 


That is a ground blind. In my library. 
I hear all the best libraries are putting in ground blinds this season. 
Sigh.
Once again I wonder how in the world I came to meet and fall in love with and marry an athlete, a hunter, a painter-turned-businessman, a fixer-of-everything, a builder of much. 

I guess it's pretty simple really- he makes me laugh and he's my knight in shining armor whom I never expected to meet. 
And other things. 
As you know.

Love...Ms. Moon

Saturday, September 21, 2024

It's Always Chow Time, Isn't It?


 It was another weeping day today. I don't know why. The amount of uselessness I feel lately has been overwhelming. I don't feel like I'm being there as a wife or as a mother or as a grandmother and as I become more and more reclusive, these feelings become more intense because honestly- they are true. 
It is a dreadful ring-around-the-rosy battle, a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy, I suppose. I feel as if I have no connection at all with the busy, traveling, laughing woman I used to be but then I stop and remember- I had depression then too. I had anxiety then too. I just couldn't give in to it to the degree I can now when very little forces me out of my house. 
I will be talking to my doctor about possible changes in my medications next week. 
Meanwhile, I had just finally gotten motivated enough today to get out and work in the yard when Glen got home from doing a chore at one of the places he hunts and said that he was going to pick up Lily's kids to take them to lunch and to get frozen yogurt. At first I could not even fathom going with them but when he asked me if I was, I knew I had to go. I really did. And so I changed out of my overalls and into a dress and slipped hoop earrings on and we went and picked up the kidlings. Maggie was so dressed up and pretty with very well-done make-up and clasp earrings and a hairband with a butterfly pinned to the top. The silver shoes were the icing on the cake. The boys were ready to go, Owen had just gotten off work. 
We went to Chow Time because it's so easy. Everybody gets what they want, no hassles with a menu. Maggie always gets miso soup and sushi and chicken on a stick and Gibson likes the sushi too. Owen gets a variety of things. I love the soup and the green beans and the cabbage and a few bites of different types of stir fry, shrimp and an egg roll. The kids told us about things going on in their lives. Owen has taken his driver's ed test online and can go get his learner's permit as soon as he turns fifteen which will be on Thursday. 
Yes. I swear to you- he turns fifteen on Thursday. I do realize this is impossible and yet, here we are. 
He is going to take a drone piloting class soon and is excited about that. His grades are very, very good. He's in all the advanced classes, already getting credits for college. Plus of course, he's working. He is the best big brother imaginable, always keeping his eye on Maggie and Gibson, too. He is six feet tall now. He is purely grand. 

Gibson reports that he is doing well in school, has friends, and is happy. He loves his cat Nico and Nico loves him. I saw the little black kitty jump from their couch onto his shoulder when I was hugging them goodbye after our outing. 

And Magnolia? Well, she is the queen of the universe, still and always. Her conversations include the word, "...basically..." in a most generous manner. She is already feeling better after being on her antibiotic for a day and had no complaints in that area.

Although Chow Time has a large selection of desserts, Maggie had been promised a trip to Nuberri, a very fun frozen yogurt and ice cream place, if she'd had a good week in certain behavioral areas which she had, and so rather than get dessert at the restaurant, we took them to Nuberri. The place sells soft serve frozen yogurt and ice cream and sorbet which you yourself dispense in a cup and then there are a great number of choices of toppings you can add on. The cup is weighed at the cash register and you pay by the ounce. Children, of course, love this. So does Mr. Moon. I was way too full to even contemplate that sort of foolishness. 

And then we took them home and they must have said "thank-you" ten times apiece and I was so happy to tell Lily how sweet her babies had been. 

I had been more cheerful during our time with the kids, of course. That is how it works. I quit thinking for a few hours about me and my pathetic life and concentrated on them and their lives. When we got home, my spirit sank again but I put my overalls back on and went out and cleared at least another six square inches in the area I was working on a few days ago. It's so dense with plants that I do not want in there. And there are a few plants that I do want- mostly ferns. I love ferns. They have my full-hearted encouragement to grow wherever they want but it's hard to dig up the bulbs of the crocosmia and the roots of the many other invasive plants without disturbing the ferns, that I wonder if it's worth it to even try to save them. 
At one point, as I was searching around in the dirt to locate the crocosmia bulbs, it suddenly appeared as if a small clod of dirt had become animate, hopping a few inches away from my hand and stopping still. It was the sweetest little toad you ever saw, his camouflage almost perfect. I moved to a different area to let him feel less threatened. 

And Mr. Moon has done a very fine thing. When we moved here, the water supply came from a well that was pumped from the ground via a...pump. It was fine except that if the pump had a problem or if we lost power, we had no water which is worse than having no electricity. When Jefferson County put in a water system, we signed up and got hooked up. It has been quite satisfactory. We have thought our pump was broken all this time but a guy who had come to fix our across-the-street neighbors' pump came over and gave it a look and said all it needed was to have the air in it leaked out and he did that and now it works again. So Glen dug down and reattached the line to the garden from the pump and so we are, as we speak, watering with well water. 

And I guess, aside from the crying, it's been a good day. 


Pine cone lilies. Those cones are heavy with the liquid they contain but I have not tried it as to its ability to wash hair yet. The arrangement of them in the house reminds me of bark cloth, which of course I love. 

Off to cook more fish. 

Love...Ms. Moon


Friday, September 20, 2024

Friday News


 Here are the first sprouts coming up in the garden. They are Chinese cabbage, planted all of three days ago. The kale and arugula are also coming up and the arugula was only planted day before yesterday. This makes me so happy, those tiny little signs of life, those tender, tenuous promises of what's to come. 

I didn't answer comments today. I've just got home and it's almost six and not only is it martini night, but the clean sheets are not yet on the bed. We are having leftovers for supper so that will help with the timing of it all. I've been in town since about 12:30. I got a call from Lily at work that Maggie was complaining about what could be symptoms of a UTI and although Jason had already picked her up from school, the last time they'd been to an Urgent Care, they wouldn't let Dad in the examining room with her and Lily had not been able to leave work and Maggie cried and it was all very traumatic so...could I go too? 
Of course. That is something a MerMer can do. 
Maggie wasn't traumatized today and they let Jason come in the exam room too but I went to the bathroom with her to help her with the necessary urine sample so I was glad I went. The doctor recognized Maggie and Jason and was as sweet as she could be but not in a treacly manner. "Hey Pumpkin," she said to Maggie. "Where's my hug?"

A prescription was given and Jason took her home and I hurried on over to Jessie's house where Glen was going to meet me. He and I had planned to pick up August and Levon from school and take them on a date and we did that. We had a really sweet time and those boys are so funny and smart. We started out at Lake Ella which is not much more than a largish pond in Tallahassee where people come to drink coffee and walk and play chess and read and shop in the little stores that were once a part of The Lake Ella Motor Lodge. It's a charming little part of Tallahassee and is known far and wide for the many, many ducks that hang out there, living a duck's best life. 


Levon admired this one's iridescence and I liked its facial decorations. The boy found a white feather and put it on a rock in order for it "to be returned to its original owner." That cracked me up so much. 
We walked over to the cottage where you can buy ice cream or homemade candy and various brittles. The same woman has been running that business for years and it's one of those heartwarming stories. 



After the ice cream was all eaten, the boys and I walked a little ways around the lake and looked at stuff and talked about stuff. There's a Vietnam Veterans' "Hootch" on the lake with a Medivac Helicopter from the "conflict" right beside it. I told my grandsons about what we called the Viet Nam War and how I was a kid when it was going on and how stupid it had been and how we'd had no business being involved in it and how so many soldiers were killed. I thought about Ross but did not mention him, about how he had come back from that war which did eventually kill him with several different cancers from exposure to Napalm. 
 

"Who won that war?" August asked. 
"Not us," I said. 

May my grandchildren never have to fight in a war or a conflict of any kind. May their souls and bodies remain untouched by those horrors. 


And then we had Boppy drive us to the Goodwill Bookstore where I promised them each one book apiece or one game apiece. Their choice. It did not take them too long to settle on what they wanted. 


We bought their choices and then it was back to their house and all was well with the world. We'd had a good time, treats were eaten, laughs were had, a lesson in American History according to Mer had been taught. 

So I got to see three grandchildren today and I'm glad of it. I'm sorry that my visit with Maggie had to be at a clinic but it was not unpleasant in the least. 


Here's what my sprouting mangoes look like now. I need to rustle up some more pots. 

This is what my quite possibly a decade or more potted Roseland mango looks like now. 


It's had a very, very happy summer with no Bradford pears shading it out. 

And I wanted to say about yesterday's post that I had no doubt that the reporter who wrote me was not authentic. It was just the fact that an employee of a publishing company chose to write on notebook paper. It was a perfectly fine note. And honestly, I have no desire to have my house featured in the Jefferson Journal for any reason. I love my house and yes, it is old and yes, it has historical significance but I really don't have much information about the history. I do know there used to be a very small Episcopalian chapel where my driveway is now until there were no more Episcopalians in Lloyd at which time it was moved to Tallahassee where it still is. I don't think the house was used as a hospital during the Civil War as some people maintain, nor do I think it was a bordello in the forties, as the guy who sold it to us claimed. I've never seen any ghostly activity, or felt any paranormal energy. 
It is my house. For now. I am only one of the many, many people who have lived here, who will live here. I feel no need to draw attention to it. Let it be one of those houses that when you drive down a back road you see and think, "Wow. I wonder what the story behind that house is," and then move on down the road to the next little town, leaving that house in peace. 

So those are my thoughts on that. 

Happy Friday from a somewhat cranky old lady.

Love...Ms. Moon


Crepe Myrtles at Lake Ella