Saturday, April 9, 2011

Today's The Day

Last night when I was doing dishes I rooted around for Mr. Moon's and my old champagne glasses from when we got married. The ones that said Bride and Groom.
Somehow, twenty-six and a half years later, I still have them.
I pulled them out and washed them up and they're sitting ready on the kitchen island.

Silly things. Really. Almost kitschy now. But still. What are weddings for anyway? So many symbols that represent things we don't even really think about, just repeat for form's sake.
Those TV shows about crazy-over-the-top weddings make me want to puke. Where does this need for what is essentially a very personal thing being turned into a pageant of gross overspending come from?
Why would anyone want to put themselves through something like that?
Do women really want to be a princess-for-a-day that badly?

When I used to perform weddings, I would always remind people that it's about the marriage. And obviously, the people who asked ME to officiate at weddings already knew that or they wouldn't have asked me to say the words to bind them. Weddings are essentially a delivery system into a marriage and yes, it is lovely and right and proper to make that an event attended by those friends and family who are part of the community of the couple who will be there with good wishes and love. A day for the couple to look back on and smile.
Not to look back on and sob as they make yet another payment to Visa to continue to pay it off.

Aw, you know me. I'm on old curmudgeon about things. I just don't see the point in paying more for a wedding than it would take to make a down payment on a first house. Plus, I'd rather spend the money on a honeymoon than on a wedding.
But then again, I've never had the slightest desire to be a princess. I don't see princesses as having much fun. And someone is always casting an evil spell over them. Or their sisters are always conspiring on how to get rid of them.
Or at least that's how it was in the olden days.

I blame Disney.

For a lot of things.

Well, there ain't gonna be no Disney trappings here today.
Just two people, standing up in front of a few folks who love them, who care about them, to pledge their love for each other.

And as simple as it's going to be, I have things I feel I should get done before it all begins. So I better go do those things. I want the house to have a lot of flowers in it. Roses I pick, mostly, because that's what's blooming.

I want Jan and Jack to feel cherished, to feel loved, to be able to have a day that they look back on and smile. The day their marriage began. A normal continuation of the path their lives have taken since the day their love for each other began.

And maybe their first sips of champagne as a married couple will be drunk out of those old, kitschy glasses.

Here's to love. Here's to weddings. Here's to couples who know they are not creations of a Disney fantasy in any way, shape or form.

Here's to Jan and Jack.
May they live happily ever after.
In love.


  1. Have a beautiful day.
    I know the new couple will.

  2. our best to jan and jack and to the marvelous host and hostess. we spend under $150 bucks when we got married. that over-the-top-frou-frou wedding is certainly not for me either! plus i wore PANTS!


  3. I love thinking about you wandering about your yard cutting flowers,filling your arms and vases and not being able to help breathing it all in.
    May they live happily ever after yes.
    Have a divine day.

  4. Oh, I hope it's a perfect day for everyone!

  5. If you need extra flowers, come on over to our jungle and pick away! Or you can just ring me up and I'll do it fer ya!

    Hope your rootin tootin good time is smooth as can be!

  6. We did get a house down payment when we got married. It was instead of the big wedding.

  7. Best wishes to the lovely couple :)

  8. I love the champagne glasses! And who wouldn't want to toast from the very glasses that were used by such a lovable and loving couple all those years ago? Sounds like good luck to me! Have a wondrous day:)

  9. Beautiful day for everyone! I love that you are picking roses for them because "that's what's blooming".

    I love your view on weddings. I also never understood that whole "bein' a princess thing" at weddings either. It is such a waste of money, in my opinion. So excessive, some weddings are, and it's annoying.

  10. I hope it's beautiful from the heart gut xoxoxox

  11. I am sure that by now, the celebration is winding down, complete and perfect. Good job, all.

    You are a good friend, so loving and supportive. A good start, for a wedding. I like what you said, "...weddings are a dielivery system into a marriage..." Doesn't matter how old/young you are, those are very wise words.

    Sleep good! Hope to see some more photos of the event!

  12. Disney World can't touch it!

  13. I'm with you on wanting to spend more money on the honeymoon trip than the wedding. I don't get all the damn money people spend either. I had a small outside weather in a State Park. It was a gorgeous day. I enjoyed it thoroughly.

  14. Dear Mary, I totally agree about expensive weddings. It will be perfect at yours and I love the glasses! xx


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