Well, here I am, tucked up cozy in the Eiffel Tower room, waiting for Mr. Moon to get done with his Cushman errands at the Fairground/Agarama or whatever the hell it's called.
And quite frankly, I am content.
I have internet, books, coffee and leftovers from last night's supper which we ate at the same place we'd eaten the night before and our server was the same lady who had gone half-blind the night before and she was fine and looked much perkier and less distracted, as well she should have.
I just walked down to the CVS which, of course, is right across the street from the Walgreens, and why is this? Every freaking town has a CVS and a Walgreens right across the road from each other or at least down the block, and how can these small towns support both businesses which are virtually identical and serve identical purposes which appears to be to sell us cosmetics, snack foods, rubber shoes, candy and oh yes, fill our prescriptions. I find it almost impossible these days to find the bandaids at such places, shoved to the back as they are by novelty and seasonal items.
Anyway, I had a nice stroll and bought two birthday cards. One for Jason whose birthday is next Friday and one for Hank whose birthday is today.
Oh my. Thirty-six years ago was the first best day of my life and I became a mother and it seemed to me upon his birth, that he had always been with me but that his physical presence in my arms was the perfect fulfillment of destiny or something like that, something I don't even have the words for, am still grasping to find a frame of reference for here in this life but which I am beginning to doubt doesn't even exist and this year I'm not even going to try.
I am just going to say Happy Birthday to my boy, my Hank. I am going to thank him for making me a mother, for fulfilling my destiny along with his own, for being exactly who he is and has always been. My joy, my firstborn, my teacher of life.
I love you, Hank. I have loved you throughout eternity and I'm pretty certain it'll flow that way from here on out. I don't understand it but I don't have to. It just is.
And you just are.
Dang. You make me so proud.
I'll make you that pie soon. I promise. We'll light candles and we'll sing and we'll watch you make a wish because wishes are important and powerful, especially when made in the presence of those who love you.
Me being the first.
Always and forever.
Happy birthday...Your Mama