Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Walking And Chewing Gum At THE SAME TIME!

No, those are not Christmas decorations. They stay up all year 'round.
So there.

I am a hot mess this morning. I can't seem to figure out the electrical wiring between brain and body. I went to get out a pair of socks from my drawer and there is so much black in that drawer and none of it was two socks that went together and I finally just shoved the thing closed and went sockless.
It's not that cold.

I have GOT to get organized.
Me and the entire world.
I love how in January they put all the Lean Cuisine and Weight Watcher meals on sale at Publix and the Rubbermaid bins at Target.

Lose weight and get organized!
Do it!

Forget it. Not this morning.

I went out to let the chickens into their run. They had no water. The thing they drink out of is a very primitive device. Believe me.
I couldn't get it apart to fill it up. When I finally did, after drenching my new Antique Ye Olde Gap Outlet overalled leg, I felt as if I'd conquered space. Yeah! That's me! Standing on the moon with my chicken waterer! With wet legs! Wearing slippers with no socks! Call NASA for an update!

Next thing that almost made me cry:
My necklace was tangled!
Oh god. Oh lord. WHAT WILL I DO?
I got it untangled. This time I felt as if I'd done brain surgery.

Slowly things are coming together. I can type.

Just got an e-mail from Jack and Jan. It says this:

Hope you all had a great holiday! See you on the Opera House stage at 7:00 this evening. We'll block Act I, Sc 2, then run all of Act I.

Oh Lord. Again. Oh Lord.

And Owen's coming.

To-do list for today:

Lose weight, learn lines, organize, take care of Owen, make sure he doesn't drink poison, fall off of something very high, or eat light bulbs. Possibly teach him to read.

At least the chickens have water. At least my necklace is untangled.

Heighho, Silver! Away!

Where's my horse to gallop on? Where's my brain? Where's my husband? Oh yes. In the woods. Probably thinking about oatmeal.

Can I do that? Make oatmeal?
Maybe. So- conquer space, do brain surgery AND make oatmeal.

So much to ask of me.

And I KNOW he's going to ask me if I've "had time" to find a good sausage recipe. Yes. We're going to try and make our own sausage.


Sorry. No. I haven't had time. I've been inventing the wheel.

It's one of those days.

Carry on.


  1. You are so funny. I love how "lose weight" is the at the top of your to-do list for the day, and possibly teach Owen how to read. That's funny because it's true.
    And yes, I too was having some of those I'm-about-to-cry-because-my-necklace-is-tangled moments yesterday. Hate when that happens.
    Well, all I can say is you're going to get through this day just like any other, and I'm sure you will have a grand time seeing what amazingly cute things Owie does today. Take some pics for me!
    I love you Mama.

  2. My brain is tangled.

    and I was just out in the snow trying to get the chickadees to eat out of my hand, with big snow boots, no socks, pj's.

    I have too many things I'm suppose to do today,and that seemed like a good place to start.

  3. Thank you for that laughter this morning. Call NASA! For the record, I am a champion necklace untangler. It's getting harder as the hands get clunkier and the eyesight falters, but it's about patience mostly and I have none left, except for untangling things. Thirteen year old daughter gives me plenty of practice.
    Lordy your day is busy, I feel lazy and worthless just reading it. Must run out for lean cuisines and organizational bins!

    Have a great day, Ms. Moon! Don't let Owen eat any light bulbs:)

  4. Love love love the header pic of some of your favorite things, i'm a huge lover of all things Frida...
    Hope the day starts smoothing out for you my friend, otherwise I hope you grow comfortable in today's discombobulation. I can so identify with this post, you some how never fail to remind me that I'm not alone, thank you for that.

  5. Ha. :)

    I had to leave the house before 9.30 today, and I was so fucked up and tired I could have lain down on the STONES and gone to SLEEPin the cold when I was out and about.

  6. Oh, lord, no lie. We just found out up here that Rick Scott wants to completely do away with the entire branch of the office I work in. We'll see how that goes.

  7. Jazz hands. That's all I can see or think about when I read this post.

    Jazz hands.

  8. i can only smile
    and send you love from my snow covered world.
    oh this life we lead and the nearly impossible expectations it is tangled with!

  9. Too much to do. You had my head swirling. I suggest showing the Mister how to make his own oatmeal. You are Mrs. Moon, the actress, not a kitchen maid. We men can slave over a hot stove and do quite well.

  10. Funny because it's all true. My personal religious morning observance is the sacrament of coffee which helps clear the cobwebs of my brain. Now I read that chicken water will do the same thing. Now all I need is some chickens.

    You'll get all the important things done & the rest will wait. You weren't going to make sausage today anyway.

  11. That's a lot of living for a Tuesday.

    I'm with Kathleen - bless the sacrament of the holy coffee.

  12. My head is spinning. My Italian cousin makes his own sausage -- soprressata. Would that be too ethnic for you and Mr. Moon?

  13. Honeyluna- It's so hard to get a picture of Owen these days. For one thing, I can't leave him to go get the camera. And then if I do get it he's on to the next thing and doesn't care to pose at all and he moves so fast! Well, you know.
    I love you so much, baby girl. I hope classes went well today.

    deb- That sounds like a great place to start ANY day! I would love for chickadees to eat out of my hand!

    Mel- Owen ate no light bulbs. It was a highly successful day.

    tiffany- We're all just stumbling down the path, aren't we?

    Jo- Don't do that! You'll freeze to death! Get some rest, poor baby!

    DTG- What the hell is that man thinking?

    Ms. Trouble- Nah. We did monster hands instead.

    rebecca- I know! Getting up AND doing things. Gah!

    Syd- Yes, but he might expect me to go make money. I'd rather make oatmeal.

    Kathleen Scott- I would die without coffee. And you're right! No sausage making today!

    Lisa- I think this Tuesday may never actually end. And I'm about ready for my afternoon coffee. My heart palpitations are almost gone.

    Jo- That woman is perfectly awesome. And that post is perfectly perfect.

    Elizabeth- I would love to try to do a bit of it. I know it's delicious. But you know us- gotta make the good old spicy southern sausage. Red pepper and sage will probably be involved.

  14. Nobody told me there'd be days like this. Yes, Brother Lennon! As usual, he got that shit exactly right.

    I love you. You are not alone in having days of WRONG. That shit is human.

  15. The Valentine cards are out at the store too. Yes the ads for storage / organize /are everywhere. Diet this, diet that. The latest, the greatest, the ones that work, the ones that won't...it is all there to hit us when we are feeling lost after the holidays. Oh me oh my...

  16. Having had maybe half an hour of sleep last night, I will be happy if I manage to piece together breakfast for the kids. After I read just one more blog. Thank fuck for morning kids TV.

  17. When I have days like this I usually just sit down and ignore it all.

    It works sometimes.



Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.