Lost And Found And Key Lime Pie

Well, as promised, here's my recipe for key lime pie.
Can't read it?
I know.
I'll give it to you further down the page. I will.

It's Sunday morning and I'm not in an especially good mood. It's hot already. I'm sorry. I should either quit talking about the heat or move to Vermont. Maybe Alaska. I don't know.

Subtropical Storm Beryl is supposed to hit the east coast of Florida tonight, maybe, and that should bring us some rain. I'm hoping. I don't even know what a subtropical storm is and I think they just invented this shit when global warming moved the hurricane season up a month.
I could be wrong.
I probably am.

Okay- here's a mystery: Where did the giant Pence in my wallet come from? I always keep a few pesos in there because, well, what if I suddenly find myself magically transported to Mexico?
(I wish.)
But a little while back I suddenly discovered that coin you see above in the change part of my wallet. I don't even know what country it's from. Great Britain? Y'all help me out here. On the back it says, "One Pence" and "1962".
Don't you think I'd remember when I came into possession of this pence?
I must have consciously put it in there. I really don't think that the Pence Fairy did it.
But I swear- I do not remember.

I also keep finding silverware in my silverware drawer that is not mine. Several spoons, a knife.
I'm used to things disappearing but what's up with this sudden and mysterious appearing?

Am I losing my mind?

Maybe.
Quite possibly.

I feel certain that someone is going to read this and think, "I gave Mary that coin. And she doesn't remember. God. She is really losing it." So if you gave it to me, go ahead and tell me. I'll laugh and say, "Oh yeah. NOW I remember." I'll be lying.

As to the spoons and knife- well, wherever they came from, I can sure use the spoons. My own spoons have disappeared at an alarming rate until I am down to about two which every mother can understand. Spoons are the universal default tool for children and their projects.
So- to whoever left those spoons in my kitchen- Thanks!
Also, for the pence. I have a slight feeling that maybe one of you DID give it to me. If so, go ahead and remind me. It's sort of magical to think that it just appeared in my wallet but it's sort of driving me crazy, too.

All right. I better go make those pies. The recipe demands that they be served chilled.

Chilled. What a beautiful word.

Happy Sunday, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon

Key Lime Pie

(original recipe)

3 eggs, separated

1 can sweetened condensed milk

(Like Eagle Brand)

1/3 cup sugar

3/4 cup key lime juice

1- 9 inch pie shell

Beat egg yolks. Add sweetened condensed milk. Beat again. Add lime juice. Beat 'til smooth.

Put in pie shell. 

Make meringue with whites and sugar. Top pie. 

375 degrees until brown.

Serve chilled.

Deviations

My family likes their key lime pies made without the meringue but topped with whipped cream. Also, they like a graham-cracker crumb crust instead of a regular pastry pie shell. Or, sometimes, a ginger-snap crumb crust. That's what I'm going to make today. You could even cheat like crazy and buy one of those pre-made graham-cracker crumb crusts but you can also buy pre-smushed graham cracker crumbs in a box. You mix those up with some sugar and melted butter and bake them for a little while. Don't ask me how long. I'm not here to tell you how to make graham-cracker-crumb crusts or ginger-snap-crumb crusts. Look that shit up. 

Now. Here's a problem. They do not advise making anything with raw eggs any more and if you bake the pie to brown the meringue, you will supposedly kill off the salmonella or whatever evil thing lurks in raw eggs and if you don't, if you use the whipped cream (and you better use real whipped cream, okay? not any fake shit) you are not baking the pie. I am of the opinion that the lime juice will kill the nasty bugs if there are any in there but I don't want anyone suing me for advising them to use raw eggs and then getting sick. So. DO NOT BAKE AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Jesus.

And one more thing: If you can't find fresh key limes (which are smaller and rounder than regular limes) you can use any limes. Look for the yellowest ones when you buy them because limes are not really ripe when they are dark green. In reality, ripe limes are sort of yellowish. The riper, the juicier. 

Got that?

This is an exquisite pie. Supposedly it was invented down in the Florida Keys back in the olden days when they had lots of chickens and thus eggs and lots of lime trees but no fresh milk. (Don't ask me.) 

Whatever. It is pretty much to die for and I do not believe there is anyway to make it better by the addition of anything fancy. And it's butt-easy to make with the exception of the work of squeezing the limes. You CAN use bottled lime juice but it's not going to taste the same or as good.

So buy limes and squeeze them.

No. You cannot use fat-free sweetened condensed milk. If you want to save some calories and fat, do the meringue instead of the whipped cream. I am not sure when meringue-topped pies fell in favor but they seem to have. I personally think there is nothing so handsome as a tall peaked and browned meringue and I like the way it tastes, too, but not everyone does.

I understand this.

I am cool with this.

Just sayin'.