Monday, May 7, 2012

Home Alone In Lloyd

1. I just saw a totally giant rat on the back porch. I threw an Esquire Magazine at it. It ran out the dog door. It barely fit through.

2. I NEED a gay man-friend desperately.

3. Why is there no chocolate in this house? For god's SAKE!!!! Why is there no chocolate in this house????!!!!!

4. Yes. Mr. Moon is out of town. Why do you ask?


  1. ugh! I remember giant rats on the porch in SC. UGHHHHH!!!!!

  2. Hahaha was that a Dooce reference?

  3. So, the sheriff finally made it out. He went to Carol's by mistake... sigh.

    Anyway, he was nice, but did not check the perimeter so much as checked to see if anyone had tried to get in the doors. I told him I didn't think that was the case, I just thought I heard loud rapping and that it had been suggested by a neighbor that it was gunshots and told him where. He said he would do a drive about. Whatever.

    I feel better knowing it was just distant gunfire and nobody actually AT my door! ha!
    xo PS no rats for us, but a rather large palmetto. EEK!

  4. Kristin- I guess it's another of the south's charms.

    Stephanie- What? No! I am just reporting what's going on here in Lloyd at my house tonight.

    Ms. Fleur- Hey- they came! Next time I hear those rifle shots I am calling them again. I swear.

  5. I haven 't seen any rats around here. I'm thankful for that.

  6. Whaaaat? If a rat came in my dog door, I'd, I'd I'd.....check into a hotel? Shit. Can you sleep in a shower stall or something?
    I will be checking your blog first thing in the morning.

  7. *thump*

    (me passing out after hearing about the rat not the porch. the GIANT one.)

  8. I believe there may be an unopened can of chocolate almonds of some sort - maybe just dusted - in the munchie cabinet.

    Also, if you sprinkle cocoa powder over honey nut cheerios and stir them up real good and then maybe add some dried cherries, you get chocolate cherry cheerios.

  9. I'm with Denise. If a rat were in my house or porch, I'd be in a hotel. As for the gay man friend, I have one, and he's my best friend in all the world. I love him to pieces.

  10. OMG about that rat -- I'd be dead of a heart attack. Gay male friends are the best. It looks like downtown guy has good suggestions for the chocolate craving. I hope Mr. Moon gets home soon to take good care of you. It seems you had a wonderful day with Owen. He sounds and looks adorable.

  11. You need to come to my house, I have chocolat. Real Belgian chocolate...

  12. I think you need a gun. If I had huge rats anywhere near my house, I'd have a gun and know how to use it.

  13. Syd- Oh you can bet they're out there. Just maybe not on your porch.

    Denise- Ha! No rats in the bed. That I know of, anyway.

    gradydoctor- I know how much you love my stories of GIANT rats.

    DTG- Forget those almonds. Forget any cheerios. I wanted chocolate. Oh well. I'm going to the store today.

    Elizabeth- I'm jealous. As to the hotel thing- in LLOYD? Well, there is a little motel thing down in the truck stop parking lot. But, uh, no.

    Anonymous Jo- Owen IS adorable. And Mr. Moon will be home tonight. We take care of each other. We do.

    Photocat- Long way to go for some chocolate. But, might be worth it.

    Jill- I'm glad.

    Jeannie- No way. I couldn't hit a barn door with a gun, much less a rat. I'd end up with holes all over my porch and the rats would be laughing at me.

  14. I had possums through my dog door. And attack cats to help me herd them away.


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