Unbelievable

Hell on earth or at least that's what it feels like outside. Between the heat and the mosquitoes.
Okay. I know, I keep talking about these mosquitoes but even my next-door neighbor who has lived here most of her life and who is tougher than a box of nails is complaining about how horrible they are.
"I can't even open my front door!" she says.

She's right.

I'm just miserable. I had to be outside to do a few chores but beyond that, my mother is having a bad day and when I got home this afternoon, I had a message from the assisted living place and why can't they call my damn cell phone? and I called the nurse there and then I called Mother and I don't know what to think. The nurse went and checked on her again after we spoke and called me back to report that Mother was sitting in the dining room eating and chatting with her table mates and when asked how she was reported only a small headache.


But some of the things Mother said to me on the phone sounded very strange and I don't mean strange like there's something going on in the assisted living place but rather in her brain and I will go and see her tomorrow. 


So. I'm hot and I'm miserable and I'm feeling the guilt and worry that I always feel when I talk to my mother and I'm too tired to have the resources to deal with any of it. 


As crazy as this sounds, I am going to go make a fish chowder and maybe by the time it's ready, Mr. Moon and I will both be cooled down enough to eat it and then we can go to bed and I tell you this- if John Gorrie hadn't invented the air-conditioner, we would not be living here or, if we were, I would just go ahead and die because honestly, this is horrible and I feel so bad for the people all over the country who are suffering this same heat and who may not even have air conditioning because either they can't afford it or because they don't usually need it. I can only assume that people are dying.

And I think about how so much of the Republican party is obsessed with threats that are so vague and so unproven and meanwhile, so many of them deny climate change which, as far as I can tell, is the gravest threat not only to our nation but to our entire world.
Fuck them.

Yeah. I'm tired.

Let's all sleep good tonight.

Love...Ms. Moon