Sunday, December 12, 2010


Okay. I've started. Evil Santa is plugged in.
He's my favorite Christmas decoration except for my nativity scene. I haven't put that up yet but I will.
I got Santa at a Goodwill a few years ago and until he's plugged in, he does not look so evil. But boy-oh-boy, once he's lit from within, he just radiates menace and cruelty. Which is why I love him, of course. He's old, he's vintage, he's BAD!

Happy, happy! Joy! Joy!

Mr. Moon, of his very own accord and volition, put lights on the fence and the front of the house. I was rather astounded. But I am also rather delighted. It came out good.

I like to dress up the old lady for Christmas. And I love the big old-fashioned colored light bulbs. I know some people like to find a theme and stick to it. Blue. White. Gold.
Yeah. Not me.
I am not afraid of color. I love it. And if there's a theme to any part of my life it is chaos. Or maybe eccentric eclecticism.

Okay. Maybe it's just trashy.

But I tell you what- I do love a good Christmas light display. So much so that I keep lights up all year 'round in various places. I also keep the collection of my husband's family's Christmas ornaments up all year 'round.

Fuck it. If it's good in December, it's good in July.

Then again, I'm the person who gets her tree down and its ornaments packed away on Dec. 26th. I have no idea why that is but I am just compelled to do that. I know people who keep their trees up until after New Years. That would drive my ass crazy. And it's not like I don't love trees! I do!
Oh well. That's me.

I used to work with a woman at Weight Watchers who lived somewhere far out in the country and on about November 2nd she would announce that she had put up ten thousand, four hundred and ninety five Christmas lights around her double-wide. Or some number like that. An astounding number! And she was so proud of herself! She also had a Christmas party every year and every year I was invited and somehow figured out how to avoid going. I think one of the reasons I had to quit working for Weight Watchers was that I was running out of excuses for not attending that party.
Look- she drank wine out of boxes. Need I say more?

Anyway, here we are, it's about to get colder than hell. It's going to get down to 25 degrees tonight and 22 tomorrow. We will be suffering, believe me. The wind is already making the remaining leaves on the Bradford pears shiver with a stiff rustling sound which does not bode well for us thin-blooded people. Or for the leaves, either.

But we are cozy inside and the outside is brightly lit. I even went by the CVS and bought a string of lights which are shaped like stars and change color. Mr. Moon hung them over the kitchen door for me and I am so charmed by them that I probably won't take them down but will leave them up until they die of their own accord.

Those two door-frame hugging cherubs stay up all year 'round too. Why take 'em down? They're precious. Plus, I bought them years ago from my friend Lynn's son Dylan when he was doing a school fund raiser. They have meaning, they have memories associated with them. And they're just so darn cute.

For someone who hates Christmas, I certainly do keep a lot of Christmasy stuff up all the time. And maybe that's it for me- why should we have a holiday where we all try real hard to express the joy of giving, the joy of lights, the joy of babies and mothers and trees when I celebrate that stuff every day of the year?

Okay. Christmas morning is the only day of the year that we have pastries for breakfast. I admit that. But as to the rest of it- well, every day is a miracle to me that I wake up and get up and can enjoy my coffee.

And besides that, the dogs pee on the Christmas tree and god knows I can't put presents under it because they'd pee on those too.

Well, as The Band said, You take what you need and you leave the rest.

It's not a Christmas carol but there are horns and they were the very best band ever to come out of North America in my opinion.

And this old lady, this house of mine, was six years old in the winter of '65, which is when they're singing about.
1865, that is.

And here it is, the winter of 2010.
I am taking what I need and leaving the rest. I hope never to leave the very best.

Merry Christmas from Lloyd where Evil Santa knows when you are sleeping, knows when you're awake.

Bundle up. Stay warm. Plug in the lights. Dance in the glow.



  1. I love your Evil Santa!
    (and I get twitchy if I don't take the tree down within four days after Christmas... it's a bizarre compulsion. My mother keeps hers up through the Epiphany...)

  2. I love evil santa...and I take my tree down the day after Christmas too. I like it but it messes with my "flow"

  3. I love the parts you keep of the Christmas celebration and the parts, Evil Santa!, that are uniquely your own. I'm the same with fairy/Christmas lights. I love that half light they give to the living room and leave them up way after the holidays.

    Thinking of you and the Moon Man dancing a slow waltz in the glow. x0 N2

  4. I've had wonky internet service today, so don't know if my comments on the past couple of posts worked,
    but basically I adore your love of what brings you joy and how you know enough to stay grounded in that.

    And that you respect that we are different.

    I think that I like that life encompasses so much mystery. I prefer to allow for that than hold firm belief in things .

    Except I firmly believe in the power of love.

    Thanks for sharing so much of it.

  5. A loves your choice of Christmas carols (no one does it better than The Band) and she covets Evil Santa too. We had cirrhosis Santa last year but we updated his light bulb and he's now all energy efficient with a slightly blue hue. I guess he's now cyanotic Santa.

    Mr. Moon did a wonderful job on the house and fence. It looks lovely.

    Last year someone told me I shouldn't celebrate Christmas if I don't believe in Jesus and all the virgin birth stuff. I told her that was very Christian of her. :) We all take what we want from this holiday and make the best of it.

  6. Evil Santa made me giggle! I love him.

    Your lights all look amazing. I need to put some up at my house, need to feel the holiday spirit.

  7. You are officially raising the bar. I think I will hang a stocking.


  8. hahaha! That Santa CRACKS me up every year!!! Thank you for getting a close-up of his face!!! haha! :) LOVE it. You made my night.

  9. We have about 25 boxes of Christmas stuff that we put up. I like the lights in the house as well as outside so we have them hanging in the kitchen and the stairs are draped in lights over pine boughs. It is so Christmasy that I can't stand it. We really like the cool lights outside as well. I will post photos soon. Glad that you are enjoying the decorations.

  10. I wish you were my neighbor even if you do bring property values down.
    Scary Santa is nice but a scary lit Johnny Weismuller would really make for a festive holiday.
    I spent my morning catching up on all your posts, I think you are wonderful, I am making chili in your honor.
    X David
    PS. I ate poultry for dinner this evening.

  11. Our kitchen will have temperatures below 0 in the morning... I am sure. Burrrrr!

    Linda and I are talking about a solstice party complete with bonfire, you interested? All you'd have to do is walk across the street! Think about it.

  12. The Rosenbergs are all about the big old school colored lights. I believe they are called C-9's.

    Evil Santa kicks decor-ass.

  13. I remember Evil Santa from last year. We have his twin who isn't quite so evil but rather more stupid.

    I, too, adore The Band. I was born about ten years too late, I think --

  14. To "Mel's Way" above: As I've said, I'm a "secular Christian." Anybody who wants to argue that Christmas in the US is not secular will get a heap of laughter from me.

    OK, Ms. Moon, I have to take issue with the wine-in-the-box comment. It's made a comeback and is actually really good! And it stays fresh, unlike bottles once you remove the cork. Trust me. Really.

    But I completely agree with you about the excuse-making to avoid social occasions we don't want to attend. I get "sick" a lot. Though my friend Jenny's favorite is when I once said, "Oh, I would go ... but I just don't want to."

  15. Corinne- It was a good day, the day I found Evil Santa.

    Lilligirl- Maybe that's it. It messes with my flow. I'll remember that.

    N2- Thank-you, sweets. Thank-you.

    Deb- Mysteries galore. I agree.

    Mel's Way- Haha! That's so funny! That you shouldn't celebrate Christmas if you don't believe. Okay! Fine with me.

    notjustafemme- Well, I don't if the lights will give you the spirit but they look nice.

    Omgrrrl- At least you've wrapped some presents. You are FAR ahead of me.

    Nicol- It's my public service, posting pictures of Santa.

    Syd- Are you kidding me? I would go insane. But I'm happy for you guys. Yes! Pictures!

    David- You're a doll and may I say that the idea of a lit-up Johnny Weismuller makes my heart happier than a bowl full of eggnog? Love you, dear. Hope your chili was great.

    Ms. Fleur- A party? What? Me? Maybe.

    Lisa- I wish Bob Rosenberg could see my evil Santa. It might make him entirely Jewish.

    Elizabeth- It's never too late to love The Band! Post pictures of Stupid Santa, please.

    Nola- You may be right about the wine-in-the-box but believe me- she wasn't buying the good stuff.

  16. I dig Evil Santa, and I love your star lights. Please tell Mr. Moon I said his lights on the fence look fan-fucking-tastic.

    I keep X-mas lights up year-round too. They cheer me during the dark cold winter nights. I guess I'm a light-worshipper, like you.

    I adore you.

  17. I decorated my Beethoven bust with twinkle lights but that's about it. Oh. and I kicked a Christmas tree this morning. I adore your evil Santa.

  18. yay, evil Santa time!

    love those star lights, need some.

  19. Bad Santa is baaaaack!

    Lovely lights out front. If we drove by, my boy would sing the song he made up that he sings every time we pass a light display: "Christmas lights, Christmas lights, I love you! Christmas lights, Christmas lights, you love me too!"

  20. Ms. Bastard-Beloved- I'll tell Mr. Moon you said that although I have to admit that shortly after I took that picture, the fence lights just completely stopping being lit. DANG!
    I adore you too!

    Radish King- You kicked a Christmas tree? Ha! Kick one for me.
    That Santa rocks, doesn't he? He brings the merry to my merry christmas every year.

    Bethany- CVS!

    Lora- And my Christmas lights would love him too!

  21. We have lights to put on the stairs which Jack took one off last year so now I'm worried someone will be electrocuted but I think Babes will put them up anyway. Something about a transformer and that not being so dangerous.

    Real tree's up, fake tree's up - I sat breastfeeding while Babes hung the lights on it with the children and Christmas songs on the CD player and I swear I wanted to run. (I didn't. I just shouted "Barf!" a couple of times.)

    Anyway - I love your Evil Santa and I loved you saying he knows when you are sleeping... That is well chilly.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.