Monday, October 12, 2015

Normal Is The New Miracle

So Jessie and Vergil took August to see the dermatologist today. I am not sure how many doctors they have consulted so far about Gus's rash and they have gotten a different diagnosis from all of them but the one they got today seems correct to me.
Erythema Toxicum Neonatorum.
And no, it is not toxic at all, is quite normal, resolves on its own and IN FACT (and I am not making this up) the rash was growing less angry and disappearing in the hour or so that I was with them today.
Oh. I was so happy to be there, to get to hold him, to talk to him, to laugh at his funny faces with his mama. To see Vergil get up from his lunch and take his son to change his diaper the second Jessie discovered that he needed changing.
Yes sir, Jessie picked a good one to be her baby daddy.
When discussing everything that's happened during the Great Rash Incident, he said quite calmly and pragmatically, "Well, now we know how the system operates if we ever have another problem and where to go and what to expect."
Is that the voice of an engineer or what?
And he cooks real food (last night he made that curried squash and cashew soup I love so much) and he takes care of August in the mornings so Jessie can get a little sleep and he can build things and fix things and...well.

Here's the clothesline he put up with the diapers Jessie hung.

Tidy, eh? 
Quite frankly, the daddies of today are nothing like the daddies during the era I grew up in. Of course, my daddy didn't do a damn thing that I remember except drink and scream at my mother and disappear for weeks at a time. Well, there was that one time he cooked steaks and we played Candy Land. That was AWESOME! 
But I look at Vergil and I look at Jason and I am simply amazed and very gratified. Jason, whose father died when he was young, is everything I would want in the father for my grandchildren. He is so kind with them, so loving, so patient. He is fun and strong and so responsible and he works so hard and he takes care of his growing family fiercely and with joy. I see his face when he comes to pick up those boys up after a long day of work. He works hard, eight, nine, ten hour days and yet, when he walks in the door and sees his sons, his face breaks out in the biggest smile. He does things with his boys, he interacts with them the way fathers never used to do, and one of their favorite things to do when Lily works on Friday night is to have Super Dudes Night. They eat super dude food and play super dude games and wrestle like super dudes. 
I am so proud of him. So grateful for both of my sons-in-law. 
And they put up with the crazy, kissy, teary, giggly sort of love that comes with the family of the women they married. 
With grace. With good humor. With acceptance. 

My heart is so much more at peace tonight. 
Here's what my garden looks like. You can see the difference between Mr. Moon's rows and my own.

And now comes the terrible hard part of having to thin the rows. It hurts me to pull up tiny living plants. Isn't that ridiculous? And yet, it must be done or there will not be room and the plants will be crowded and stunted. I think I will wait for a little while. At least until there is enough growth so that I can use the thinnings in a salad. 

Mr. Moon is gone again, this time on business and so here I am and I am fine. I sent him off with his snack bag and popcorn and coffee drink and kisses. The setting sun is fire-painting the old oak across the street as it does every night at this time.

Trixie and Mabel are on the kitchen porch, hoping for one more treat before it's time to go to bed.

Remember when I thought that Trixie was dying? Well, she wasn't. And in fact, Mick just chased her down on her way back to the coop and had his way with her. She bawked a bit but now seems unperturbed and is back with Mabel, scratching in the grass while Mick has wandered off in his seeming post-coital daze of what-just-happened-there?

Ah, chickens. 

Ah, babies. 

I could live another sixty-one years and not know all there is to know about either. 
Or about love, for that matter.

Another thing I dreamed last night was that quite suddenly, my hair had turned as white as Chi-Chi and Cha-Cha's feathers. 
And I loved it. 

Peace, y'll. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I am so relieved for alla ya'll as far as August's rash. That is just good news all around, and while I'm sorry that they had to have such an early baptism into "how things work," I agree that Virgil's assessment is very practical and reasonable!

    And I love the rest of this post -- especially all the kind words about your near-perfect sons-in-laws. Wonderful -- all of it.

  2. must have a couple of go to people that know your baby....stay away from emergency rooms and urgent care! Once you establish yourself with a good pediatrician etc. it is much easier..they will even return calls on the weekend. And yes things have changed for the better with most daddies and I am very glad to see it!

  3. Elizabeth- Well, you of all people know how important it is to have a semblance of knowledge about what to do if our babies need some medical help. And you know what? The best thing about my sons-in-law? They love my daughters so much. They also respect them and pitch in to help as if they were as important to those babies as their mamas are.
    Which they are.
    I wish I'd had a daddy like either one of them. With all of my heart.

    ain't for city gals- One of the ER docs actually DID call them after he saw them to ask how things were going. Which I find just tremendously lovely. I hear that before he was a doctor, he was a nurse.
    Makes sense to me.

  4. What a relief about the rash. Yep, your son in laws are good ones! And yep, those are tidy diapers hung on the line. And Yes! I hate thinning out garden rows too, I hate to pull a living plant that isn't a weed and struggle with it yearly. We're softies, you and I. But that's ok, wouldn't have it any other way.

  5. Glad that rash is already going away on its own, and I love your appreciation of
    the good daddies who make this world a better place.

  6. I am so glad that The Great Rash episode is over. Virgil, such a wise soul, a great way to look at the rash situation. Such a beautiful photo of Jessie and August. Xx

  7. I think you know much more than most people know about love. But really, love isn't a knowing but something that happens inside of us. With every grandbaby born your love doesn't divide but multiples. And it will just go on that way until you die.

  8. I am so pleased to hear that August is on his way to healing. Jessie looks beautiful and so do her diaper clothes lines! Virgil and Jason are great dads and husbands and additions to your great family. This whole post is perfect!

  9. Well, I am so glad the Great Rash Drama seems to be coming to an end. Thank goodness it's something harmless. Vergil and Jason do sound like ideal dads. I think my dad did OK, all things considered, even if in some ways he was (is) less than ideal! Funny how just one outing with Candyland could be so memorable for you. It doesn't take much, does it?

  10. Oh, and I am with you on thinning the plants. It would be hard for me, too. Dave is much more pragmatic in his gardening. If it were up to me, I'd let everything grow unimpeded and it would all look like hell.

  11. Such a heartwarming update! I hesitated to leave a comment on your previous posts, but feel a little more comfortable doing do now. The impetigo diagnosis seemed so improbable, as where and how could August possibly have come into direct contact with it?! the latest seems most reasonably correct. My son had something very similar shortly after birth and it cleared up spontaneously and completely after a few days. That was 31 years ago.

  12. Great news about the rash and I wish for my own daughter the kind of man your daughters have married. And I wish for my son to be that kind of man in marriage too. I have a few years to wait yet! But i think I'll get busy visualizing that!

  13. And the photo of Jessie and August is so beautiful. She looks happy and at peace and he looks absolutely protected and content.

  14. Mel- Yep. We are softies. And that is who we are.

    A- Not having had one, I surely do appreciate a fine one when I see one. Amen.

    Leisha- I just love the way Vergil rolls. I don't think he has an ounce of bitterness in his soul.

    Birdie- Just like with our children. Isn't it amazing?

    Joanne- I feel like the luckiest woman in the world.

    Steve Reed- Yes. It was memorable because it was so rare. Bless the old dead man's heart.
    It is good that you and I are both with men who are a bit more heartless than we are about gardening!

    Desiree- And you still haven't forgotten, have you? Yes. The impetigo diagnosis was a bit improbable.

    Angella- You DO have a son who will grow up to be one of those dads and I feel certain that your daughter will marry one too. Thank you for what you said about the picture. You are absolutely right about all the emotions going on there.

  15. I married the type of guy who was the type of dad I always wished I'd had. It's seriously been the sexiest thing about the man, how great of a dad he is. His dad was the same way. Some families are strong with the love.

    I love your crooked little rows! Lol

  16. well, I'm glad to hear it was just one of those baby things that resolves itself with a little time. and yah, fathers today. so different. which is good because our culture had a terrible system going as far as parenthood went.

  17. I'm glad Gus' rash is getting better. And your family is lucky to have good young men as part of it.

  18. Your family is full of exceptional people.

    I couldn't be happier to hear Gus is ok and getting better.

  19. I love all of these photos. Every one of them. Happy to hear Gus is soon to be rash free. What an annoying business rashes are! It's really not at all fair that babies should have to experience them.

  20. Glad to hear that the rash is of little concern. I believe that I had some kind of rash as a baby. I know that I had to have a clot of blood vessels in a birthmark removed from my head near my ear when I was an infant. Such is the way of cells.


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