Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Day Is Sparkling Before Me

I sometimes wonder if we weave magical spells with our words. Anyone who has written fiction knows that it is not unusual to have happen in real life what one has written as fiction beforehand. Sometimes the spells are good ones, sometimes not so much.

Mr. Moon woke up this morning from sad dreams. He was still sad when he left for work and I hate it when that man is not happy. It not only tilts my world in a sickening way, it stabs me in the throat with anxiety. He is my rock, my GPS, the very horizon which allows me to keep moving forward.

And that's too much responsibility to put on one person, even a six-foot-nine-inch-tall husband with extremely strong arms.
And yet- that's how it's always been.
My job is to keep the laundry clean and put supper on the table and his job is everything else, including keeping me mentally stable.

Talk about Sisyphus.

Well. We shall get through this memorial service. I am quite certain I am going to hear stories about Colin that will make me laugh until I cry and cry until I laugh. It's inevitable. And as Truvy does say, "Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion."
I guess so, Truvy. I suppose you're right.

Well, the sun, quite thankfully, is shining. The day is unfolding. The dogs are barking, the rooster crowing, the grandson is on his way.

If life is a string of beads we collect, one at a time, there are days whose stones are bright, sparkling blues and reds and greens, always to stand out and be there as a reminder of a special time, whether sweet or sad or profound or magical or all of these together.

I think today may be one of those days.

Here we go, here we go, here we go.

I will not be wearing mascara this afternoon, I can tell you that. I may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer but I am pretty sure that "waterproof" only goes so far and it won't be far enough for today's events.

Ah, yah, Colin. We are gathering to celebrate you, stuck here on the ground while you're flying around the universe.
Or whatever it is that dead people do.
I don't know and neither do you but Colin does. Or doesn't, as the case may be.
But I do know that we here who are left behind are stuck firmly on this ground but that today we may be lifted, a little at least, by our sharing, our stories, our love for this man who has left us and hopefully, our tears and laughter will wash some of the sadness from our hearts.

And that is the way he would have wanted it.

10 comments:

  1. These words are magical and so are you.

    XXOO

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  2. thinking of you especially today.
    Ah and dear Mr Moon.

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  3. Wishing you strength, and the good that comes of being with friends at time like this.

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  4. When my father died, someone said to me that my Daddy now knew something that we don't know. That has really stayed with me for some reason. Hugs to you today.

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  5. Thinking of you today as you celebrate the life of your sweet friend.

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  6. I've been thinking about Colin and all of you since I startd this day. I'm so glad the sun is out for you all.

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  7. We each need someone or something as our rock. I have not been able to depend upon another person for that. It has had to come from within and from a mystical entity outside of me. My expectations of others mostly led to disappointment. Best of luck to Colin on his voyage. And to you for being there to send him off in a good way.

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  8. That Truvy. She's a wise one. Glad you have her in your corner today, Ms. Moon. Love.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.