Tuesday, March 24, 2015

Boys And Chickens And Other Things

About ten years ago, probably, I bought that pretty little Chinese silk shirt at a Goodwill. No one I knew could wear it but it was just such a nice garment and had a tag written in characters, not words, and so I bought it and it's been hanging on one wall of mine or another for all those years until I looked at recently and thought, "Hmmmm. I bet Owen could wear that."
And I offered it to him to wear and it fits him beautifully and now it is his.
He loves it and wore it to kick bamboo and walk up to Papa Jay's and to pick sour flowers in the yard with his brother and eat them, to feed chickens and to collect eggs as well.
We had a short visit today, but it was a good one.
Gibson is talking so well these days. His vocabulary is probably increasing by a hundred words a week and he uses such expressive hand gestures when he talks that I am sure his Italian heritage on his other grandmother's side is coming through. He makes me laugh and he likes to cuddle and when he doesn't want to do something he still says, "I can't," and that is, as far as he concerned, the end of that. 
So it's been a sweet and peaceful day. I took a picture of the grand oak next door, decorated for spring.

If you look closely, you can see that it is draped in wisteria and what you cannot see is the fact that the vine goes all the way to the top of the magnificent tree.

I have a dish of purple sweet potatoes from Whole Foods and carrots and turnips from the garden and onions and apples roasting in the oven. I don't know how good it will be but it sure is pretty.

I should be serving it with steamed greens and quinoa or something but instead I am mismatching it in an unholy alliance with a roasted chicken. There will also be asparagus.
The sun is going down and Mr. Moon is just pulling into the yard. Mick, the sex fiend, is trying to slip into the hen house without Elvis noticing. The boys and I were sitting on the side porch this afternoon and Mick had Miss Nicey twice in about ten seconds right in front of us. Owen, of course, has seen this behavior before and I have explained it by saying that the roosters are fertilizing the hens. This is as far as I care to go with sex education with a five-year old and he seems to accept it.
"Look," he said today. "Mick is fertilizing Nicey."

I have been thinking recently about how, when I was being raised, everything was explained with psychological reasoning and that most problems were believed to be caused by mothers, of course, whether the problems were schizophrenia or low self-esteem, and potty training and attitudes about sex were at the root of most everything. And so I worry a great deal that I am going to do something to damage these boys for the rest of their life without even realizing it but I'm pretty sure that telling them what is basically a truth- that the rooster is fertilizing the hens- is not going to require years of therapy as they grow older.
I hope not.

And so it has gone. Another day in the life. I have done as best I could and I feel certain that you have too.

See you tomorrow.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I'd rather see children taught "basically the truth" in a way they're ready for, than to be told the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth whether they're ready or not ... so I admire your way of explaining.

    Your grandkids are sweet and also lucky.

  2. I think that is a wonderful explanation for a 5 year old.

    That shirt was made for kicking bamboo.

    Now you have me thinking about how how every last thing was psychological. I was a bed-wetter for a very long time. All the hype that went around it certainly pointed to low self esteem or the fact my parents divorced. Turns out I just had a smaller bladder and slept very deeply. All I know that the thought of it being psychological caused psychological issues.

  3. My mother and many others of her generation suffered because of this idea...I think your explanation was just right. Have a good evening.

  4. I love the shirt, the wisteria, the sex ed, and the veggies. My god, we do try to do our best.

  5. You had me at the sour flowers -- I actually remembered the TASTE of those. The rest of the post was dessert after a terrific meal.

  6. I think it's funny that I'm obsessing about what I'm telling my children about church, and you come over and tell me they will be fine (which I needed to hear, so thank you), and then I come over here and you're wondering about if you did the right thing there. You did great! Did he not ask what "fertilising" meant?

    My children are fascinated with body parts and babies and everything that goes with it. I'm always happy to talk about all of it, except in the supermarket, waiting in line. Oh, and in the middle of a music school corridor I refused to talk about my periods the other day. But "there's a time and a place," and next to the hen house with granny is the perfect time and place.

  7. I think "fertilizing" is a perfect way to describe what's going on. I mean, that's the term biologists use, right?

    I don't think I've ever tried or heard of a sour flower. How can that be?

  8. I'm with Steve; fertilizing is perfect. Those veggies look delicious, silk shirt awesome...wisteria gorgeous, you, inspirational. XO~

  9. Every time I see bamboo I think of you.
    I was always honest with my kids, sometimes too honest, but at that age, I was creatively honest. They were truly the best of times.

  10. you've done very well indeed.
    every bit of it.
    the shirt is a treasure and Owen wears it well.
    And that vine and tree, made my heart race a little.
    all of it.

  11. That tree is a majestic thing. I love everything about this post.

  12. jenny_o- Since he seemed perfectly happy with my explanation, I was not so worried.

    Birdie- Exactly! Good Lord. The garbage we accepted.

    e- Yep. Most of us who were alive then did. And certainly had strange ideas about human behavior although some, of course, were not so wrong.

    Denise- We try our best and then we try again. Sometimes we have to take a little break in between, though.

    Elizabeth- Oxalis. My children loved them too.

    Steve Reed- I think you lived too far south for these flowers. I don't recall them from my childhood in a more southern Florida either.

    Sue Johnson- And all of this fertilizing and not one hen sitting on an egg. These hens are just horrible mothers!

    heartinhand- I figure that my job as a grandmother is to give basic information and tell fairy tales. And introduce rock and roll. The rest is up to Mama and Daddy!

    Ms. Yo- I miss you, honey! Where are you? If you could see that tree in person, you would gasp.

    Angella- This is such a beautiful time of year and quite honestly, a very good time in my life. On some days, at least.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.