I thought to go through a closet and throw away hundreds of tiny bottles of paint that I got when another sister-in-law died. Brenda is going through her own house right now, getting rid of things, getting ready to move to Texas, and she brought a few things here and I feel her pain. Her last several moves were done professionally and the movers just came in and boxed everything up and moved it and her husband put almost everything away but he died a few years ago and now she is left with the task of going through all of it- much of it family stuff that she knows will mean nothing to the next generation and yet, she is loathe to get rid of it, as filled as it is with memory and meaning for her.
But anyway, it reminded me of how I have things that I am holding on to for NO reason. I will never use them. Ever. The hundreds of tiny bottles of paint, for example, and so I got a big black garbage bag and began to fill it up but then I thought about Hank and how he loves stuff like that and does things with paint and so I called him and said, "Do you want these things?" and he said, "Keep them, I'll come go through them."
Ah-lah.
I feel like a weak kitten. I have no energy. I left the paints and the bags and the stuff I'd pulled from the closet where it all sat.
I am unsettled.
I need to go get those baby chickens and bring them in. They are growing so fast. A few of them look to be likely candidates for roosters with bright red combs coming in. Miss Flopsy is still on the nest and by god, I wish I'd never let her start this mess. Her pile of eggs increases. There are thirteen there now and this can't be right. Some of those eggs must almost be ready to hatch and some are freshly laid.
Chickens are not THAT smart. Believe me.
Brenda told me that when she was a child, she had a teacher who would give her duck eggs to bring home and put under a setting hen and the hen would actually DIE because the gestation period for a duck is longer than for a chicken and those hens just sit on those nests without eating or drinking and eventually, yes, they die.
So if any of those eggs under Flopsy hatch, I am going to throw the rest away and let her GET ON WITH HER LIFE!
Someone needs to educate hens as to their reproductive choices.
Pfft. Blah, blah, blah.
I want to bake something but what? And there's no one here to eat whatever I bake but me. No one I know personally actually needs baked goods. Neither cake nor cookies nor pie nor anything at all. Recreational baking is not a sensible thing to do no matter how sensuously satisfying it is to mix butter and sugar and flour and eggs together. I have an entire bag of lemons. I could make a chess pie. I could make lemon bars. I could make lemon meringue pie. God knows I have the eggs. Why in hell did I buy a bag of lemons? They looked so lovely, so fresh, they smell so good.
Now what?
Now what indeed?
Put them in a damn vase and pretend I'm Martha Fucking Stewart?
Yeah, no. I don't think so.
HA-HA-HA-HA-HA!
I have half of a whole pompano which Mr. Moon ordered last night for his supper. With corn relish and yams. I don't even have to make my supper. I am just going to put all of that deliciousness in foil and seal it up and put it in the oven and then eat it like an animal.
I am unsettled. The sun is going down. I need to go get those baby chickens. I have taken to transporting them in a canvas shopping bag. This pleases me. "Look!" I say. "I have a bag of chickens!" They don't care. I handle them gently and talk to them. All they care about is eating and drinking water. And growing and becoming big.
There is no one here to say, "Look! I have a bag of chickens!" to. Well, you. I just said it to you.
I suppose I better make it true.
I am NOT going to make a pie. Or a cake. I swear.
But I might put those lemons in a bowl. But then again, we are having a terrible problem with fruit flies right now.
Does Martha Stewart ever deal with fruit flies?
I have no idea.
I am unsettled. But here's the good thing- if I wake up tonight and can't sleep, I won't have to worry about waking Mr. Moon. I can just turn on the light and read. My insomnia is good in that I have read so many books lately. I just read and read and read.
I just looked up kohlrabi on google images. I realize I have two of them in my garden from when I planted my mixed mesclun lettuces. I thought it might be kohlrabi.
Goodness gracious. I lead such an exotic life.
Chickens. Bag of chickens.
Gotta go.
Love...Ms. Moon
Chicks in a bag.
I did not know that about chickens about the roost til you die notion. I know about sheep tho. We had a sheep on the ranch and every single day of her life she'd come running around the corner and be startled by the same giant rock. We'd just stand there and wait for her. It was very entertaining not much happened on the mountain except for animals and baking what the heck is chess pie I think I need me some and also what the heck is pompano? Sorry about your wrist.
ReplyDeletexoxox
dynote
BAH! I just wrote a comment and blogger ate it.
ReplyDeleteIt basically came down to ignoring Martha Stewart and thinking instead on what would Lucy Ricardo do? (Remember the episode when Lucy brought baby chickens into her house?) I say bring the chicks into the house for the night! And make something with the lemons and eat it all.
Madame King- Our dogs bark at us when we walk into the room sometimes. Jesus. Animals are awesome but they are not freaking geniuses.
ReplyDeleteChess pie is a pie made of nothing much more than sugar and butter and vinegar and buttermilk and eggs. And lemon juice if you are making lemon chess pie. It is a sin.
Pompano is a delicious fish. You wouldn't eat it because it is a fish. My wrist will be fine. It's just the wrist that I broke when I fell off a roof once. I was roofing and fell off the roof. Really. I was. Oh well. That was a long time ago but today I just twisted it weird and it did something painful. It'll be fine.
Birdie- The babes are in the house. I cut them up some apples very finely to see if they would like them. I MUST have something to tend. That's just who I am.
Martha's house is hermetically sealed - no fruit flies or house flies.
ReplyDeleteLemons look good any which way, and preferably should be set in the middle of anything.
I am prone to kidney stones, so I drink a lemon a day with Stevia (I mean I make lemonade out of it) and it keeps the stones away. They're very good for your liver too and as aroma therapy (whatever that is) just smelling a lemon can make me feel better about life and the world in general.
ReplyDeleteThat cracked me up..."no one I know actually needs baked goods" so true, but how we love them.
Sleep well x
Rubye Jack- Well, my house is not sealed in any sense of the word. Did you know that when Mormons marry, they are "sealed"? I am listening to a book on CD about Mormons and so I know these things.
ReplyDeleteliv- I had a kidney stone once. It was hell on this earth. I am sorry you have had to go though this sort of torture. If I were you, I'd drink lemon juice too.
Lemons are just sort of irresistible because of their looks. I buy them for water mostly.
ReplyDeleteHa! I bought a bag of lemons for my new house the day before yesterday. I had them out on the counter thinking I would do something with them. I didn't--just stuck them in the fridge when I left.
ReplyDeleteLemon chicken might be good....
Kidding.
I am laughing at Radish King's comment and then your response to her comment -- laughing out loud, actually, about the sheep and the dogs.
ReplyDeleteI'm still laughing.
Lemons? I adore them. Put them in the fridge. Take off the peel in big strips and make salted lemon peel -- put it in jars with more salt -- save for the winter and use in your cooking -- with pork, with venison, with chicken. If you need a real recipe, I'll send you one!
Or shuck a bunch of oysters like Susan Sarandon did in "Atlantic City," and then cut the lemons up and rub them all over your naked body.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, why not?
I think of the Dr Suess story about the elephant that hatches the egg. Horton sticks with that egg and wins out at the end of the day, as all good egg hatching elephants must.
ReplyDeleteYou sound a bot weary here, Ms Moon. Take care of this tendency to look after others. you do not want to burn out. I reckon we women have a tendency to over do the care of others at times and we run the risk of winding up like your chook.
Take care, Ms Moon and get some rest.
Nicol- Lemon water is a delicious beverage.
ReplyDeleteDenise- We were suckered in by LEMONS!
Elizabeth- Oh god. No way. I already have bottles and jars of pickled and preserved things crowding my refrigerator. But that does sound intriguing.
And sadly, I have no oysters. That was an amazing movie scene, wasn't it?
Elisabeth- Oh poor Horton. I remember him!
I'm being pretty lazy, actually. And will be until I get Owen today. And after he goes home, I'll be lazy again.
Gahdammit why are you people talking about chess pie? I haven't eaten yet!
ReplyDeleteMs. Moon, am reading this in the morning...but I hope you just said eff it all and went to bed with a good book and a fluffy pillow.
My dog barked yesterday at a leaf blowing around in the neighbors yard. She is sweet but she sometimes dumber than a box of rocks.
You can just do Nothing but read and take a nap. That sounds just fine to me. It's a wonderful life you have with bags of chicks, the kohlrabi, the little paints which are cool for all kinds of projects, and good left overs.
ReplyDeleteMartha GLARES at fruit flies til they go away. She might even have death ray laser beam eyeballs.
ReplyDeleteThis recipe is a delight, so fluffy - I made it without the essence, just the zest and a little juice. Did normal buttercream but it would even be nice without, I think.
http://www.beachsidebaker.com/2012/01/lemon-cupcakes-with-lemon-swiss.html
We have to make fruit fly traps with water and vinegar and a piece of citrus and a drop of Dawn dish detergent. It works.
ReplyDeleteHope you had fun with Owen.
http://simplyrecipes.com/recipes/how_to_make_preserved_lemons/
ReplyDelete