Monday, April 23, 2012

Hot Mess

I'm really getting tired of nights that are almost as active as my days.
Last night I woke up when the electricity went off at two. No big deal. It's rained recently and great branches get sodden and break and fall on lines and power goes. I guess. Anyway, we were thrust into sudden complete silence except for the chirping of the battery back-up power strip in the next room over. No fans to shield us from that chirp-interrupted silence. We are not used to that. The room suddenly black as velvet, no LED lights or clock numbers glowing. Just...darkness.

Before I could get used to that, Dolly the dog started yipping the yip that means she's stuck somewhere. So I got up and blindmanded my way through the house, and yes, she was in the Glen Den behind a shut door. I let her out. Found my phone and activated the flashlight app. Do you have the flashlight app? It might be my favorite. On my way back to our room, I found and flipped the switch for the battery-backed up power strip.

Deeper silence and then back to bed and to sleep and then Dolly began yipping again. This time Mr. Moon got up and he used his miner-light to find his way across the approximately forty miles of house from our room to wherever Dolly was. He came back eventually to report that she'd been on the porch, just barking, and so he'd taken her to her bed and settled her in and then cleaned up three dog poops.

Back to sleep again and the next thing I know, the fans are on again and and Mr. Moon is setting his clock. His clock was purchased at Big Lots about ten years ago and I swear, it's bigger and more complex than the console of a 747. I've never figured out how to use it. This took awhile. It was 4 a.m. by this point.

And cold. Cold, I tell you. In April. In North Florida.

I finally really and actually fell asleep after that and although Mr. Moon got up at six to go to the gym, I slept until eight-thirty, got up feeling guilty as hell, and here I am. Another beautiful day in Lloyd, Florida, crisp and blue and I'm slowly working my way through my morning despair and anxiety.

Jason has a day off so Lily doesn't need me today and I miss those boys. Here's a picture that Lily sent me last night of Gibson after his bath.

She sent me a picture of Owen too and I'd put that here but it shows his pee-pee and well, you know, I am a thoughtful and tasteful Grandmother Blogger.

I need to go to the library, I guess, and the branch library on MY side of town isn't open on Mondays so that means I'm going to have to go all the way through town but it must be done. I finally finished listening to The Nineteenth Wife and it was sad to hear it end. I saw a thing on Huffpost last night about a female Episcopal priest who visited a Mormon temple before it had been sanctified or something and she talked about how she'd felt the presence of God in this room:

That cracked me up so much. God hangs out in a room decorated like a forties dream of interior design? It's called The Celestial Room and sitting in it is supposed to be like a foretaste of heaven.
Do you see any books in that room?
Well forget it then. If heaven is about sitting on uncomfortable-looking couches and staring at the chandelier with an empty cut-glass candy dish on a table then count me the fuck out.

They did give her a "chewy snickerdoodle" at the end of the tour.

I've said it before and I'll say it again- there's a god gene and I don't have it.

I'm not sure I have the sanity gene, either, but that's another story.

I need to get busy. I need to do laundry. I need to let the chickens out and I need to go to town. I need to take a walk, I need to lose twenty-five pounds. I need to call the dog groomer. I need to put on some damn long pants. I need to get my hands on some little boys I know.

I need to get a good night's sleep, go to the beach, get that garden weeded, figure out what to do with the two gallons of not-so-fresh-anymore soup in the refrigerator, force my husband to take me on a small and intimate vacation, write a novel, a screenplay, a stage play, a poem, figure out what to do about that United Nations of Eggs that Flopsy is attempting to hatch out.

I need to buy more coffee, find a purpose in life, have a drink with Keith Richards.

Yeah. That should do it.

Happy Monday, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. cold here in atlanta too. weird weather continues.

  2. I need to do ALL of that. Minus the chickens because I don't have any. But maybe I need to get chickens, too?
    That room reminds me of a line from a Laura Marling song - "They put money in their hearts and God where their mouth is."

  3. I am definitely feeling the presence of Liberace, but not necessarily anything of the divine. Unless you count all the atoms and molecules it takes to make up all that gold and white, but this morning I'm not counting that. Maybe tomorrow.

    The first time I felt the presence of God (or whatever you want to call it, a good force of nature, a higher power, whatever) was in my front yard in Marietta when I was a girl. Red clay, pine trees, broken concrete driveway, God.

    It's chilly here, too. The heat is on and I'm wearing a scarf, all the while reminding myself that when I lived in Alaska 55 degrees in April was considered tropical. Am a wimp now, I guess.

  4. It's cold in West Virginia today with so much rain. My sinuses are revolting and the cats are pacing. The flower beds are going to go crazy with the weeds and the vegetable garden will probably never dry out enough to till. But the coffee is hot and the dog doesn't mind occupying my blanket when I do get up off the couch to fold a bit of laundry. It's an ok day, I guess. I'm blessing my husband's heart for taking his lunch to pick up my little gal from play school and delivering her back here. We're probably going to spend the afternoon with a good coloring book.

  5. OH I was tired just reading about that night, and bravo Mr Moon for cleaning up dog poops and getting up to go to the gym. He deserves a chewy snicker doodle. And you always do.

    You don't look to me like you need to lose 25 lbs, but I've lost 32lbs since Jan using an app on my iphone and I'm having a blast, myfitnesspal. Super easy, counts your calories for you. I feel SO much better, going for 20 more. Yee haw!

  6. Poor God! For some reason, I don't think he likes his room very much and must wonder where he went wrong with his people.

    I never feel guilty about sleeping late. If there is something that needs to be done, I get up. But if there is nothing pressing and you're sleepy, why not sleep. I'm a bit hedonistic though.

  7. My aunt had a room like that. No one ever went in there unless there was a death in the family, and even then, you had to take off your shoes outside, and kids couldn't come in with food.
    Some of us never got to see that room, which, is good as far as I'm concerned.

  8. I'm listening to Nina Simone via twisted knickers and now I'm laughing over her sublime voice and now I think I'm going over to my blog to riff a bit in your vein --

  9. I don't have the religious gene either. I have some kind of genes though for electronics, computers, statistics, and blunt honesty.

  10. I need to do most that stuff. Not the chickens or little ones...yet. And not the 25 pounds either. My black tie event was last Saturday. I didn't loose the weight, I lived thru it nicely if a bit too tightly, and I don't have anything on my calendar to loose weight for for months. Yay! Back to eating what I want and exercising when I want. For now.

  11. Just want to remind you that when you go to Publix, buy coffee.
    I will remind you again tomorrow, Be sure to tell me when to stop.

  12. Kristin- I have no memory of the weather ever being like this in April.

    Rachel- Hey girl. I like your place. Chickens are good for the soul.

    Chrissy- I guess my first sense of the divine came from lying on my back and looking up at the sky. Endless.
    You should have seen me in Denver. Nah.

    Ms. Fleur- No kidding!

    Dayna- West Virginia! Hello and I hope you and your little gal had a good coloring book afternoon.

    Bethany- I'll check it out, baby. I could definitely stand to lose some weight. I'm glad you've found a way to do it if that's what you wanted and it sounds like you're enjoying it too. Yay!

    Rubye Jack- Aw, well. It's my grandfather's genes that give me this sleeping-late guilt. I know it.
    As to that room- shee-it.

    Magnum- They made that woman priest put booties over her shoes to protect the carpet from dirt so yeah, you nailed it. God is a fussy old aunt.

    Elizabeth- And you did it so well.

    Syd- Those are useful genes as far as I'm concerned.

    Kathleen Botsford- Enjoy!

  13. Lo- I bought six more bags today! Thanks, sugar. You can probably stop now. Love you.

  14. I need some goals like those. Maybe we could have a drink with Keith as a three-some--he's probably got a full calendar, and well, you know, it just might be easier for him.

  15. hahaha, i love what you say about God in that designer room with no books anywhere in sight. yeah, i don't think God would be very comfy there either.

    i meant to tell you, and your mention of long pants reminded me, Owen's grandma has some very fine and strong legs! love his photo of them.

    hugs, dear mary.

  16. Denise- Works for me. The three-way with Keith, that is.

    Angella- They still look okay FROM THE KNEE DOWN.

  17. Mary I'm gone for a few days of reading...I try to catch up...I read this and I laugh. I share it with my daughter who is staying here for a bit...I laugh. I'm ever so happy to read your blog.

    Darnit...write books...then again if you write a book you may not what to do? Write a book. I'll be reading it.

    I'm going to write my book one day and hold onto it till I can attempt to get it published (hahaha) after the main folks won't sue me.

    I do not like the power going out in the dark of night. I don't know why but I still have a fear of the dark that pops up from childhood.


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