Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Only That Which Must Be Done, And Slowly

I took a walk and did not die. I saw wild grapes, spilled onto the paths everywhere. I stopped three times. Once to change my cassette tape, once to pee, once to tell a dog who was charging me to "go home." There were puddles in the dirt roads and the tracks of 'coons, like the prints of tiny children, walking on their hands.
I saw a man sitting in the long grass by the truck stop, holding a sign. I did not read what it said.

I came home and hung out clothes. I ate leftovers for my lunch. I read more Annie Proulx. She is talking about Indians now. Reading about what white people did to Indians is not apt to cheer one up at all. I need to go to town to the library. Things are due and overdue. A good citizen returns library items in a timely manner. I try to be a good citizen although I have not picked up trash in awhile.

Mr. Moon has said that he would take me away this weekend. I cannot even think of where I would want to go for a weekend. It is so hot everywhere near here. Maybe any hotel room would do, just a bed and an air-conditioner. Maybe. Any place where I do not have the option of working around here, feeling guilty when I do not. I am flat. I am feeling washed out and everything I do is done slowly. Reach for the wet clothes in the basket, shake them with a pop to unwrinkle them, pin them to the line. Walk slowly back to the house.
Wait for the next load to be done. Carry it slowly to the line. Repeat.
This is how I hang the clothes:
All the towels together in one place, all the napkins in another, the dish towels and dish cloths in another, Mr. Moon's clothes on their own line, my clothes on mine. The shirts and dresses which go on hangers in the closet are hung on the line on hangers. This way, when I take the clothes in, I can fold into the basket and everything is together to be put away in their own places. This is how I learned to do it. This is how I still do it. This is something an old woman would take pride in. I rebel, though, by not keeping my clothespins in a bag that ties around the waist that I can keep in the house so they will not rot in the wet and in the sun. I just leave them on the line and yes, they do rot.

I need to buy new clothespins.

I have rethought the library. Why drive to town and all the way across it to return items? I renewed online. I am still a good citizen.

I think I will go take a nap. I will probably dream, as I constantly seem to do now, of babies that I need to protect. I am getting very good at that in my dreams. I do not leave them and forget them the way I used to do in dreams. I keep them close, I watch over them well. The world is full of threats for babies, or so it would seem in my dreams.

A skink just ran across the porch. I wish I could get a good picture of one but they are quick and not as apt to pose as our anoles. They run and hide before the mind even registers what it saw, scampering across the floor. Some skinks have bright crimson all around their mouths and they look as if they have been drinking blood. It is a fierce sight and if I were a predator, I would beware.


  1. The world *is* full of threats to babies.

    Yay for online renewal!

  2. Take it easy Ms Moon. A lot of babies have good parents that take good care of them. And you take good care of the babies trusted to you. Taking a nap sounds like the right thing to do when it is so hot.
    I wish you a pleasant dream.

  3. If you go, can I watch the house?

  4. Yes, take it easy. Walk outside barefoot. Go back in and dance in the mirror. I like to dance like Beyonce but you can pick your own muse. It works just as well.

    Feel better, Sister Moon. You are loved because you are love.

  5. If I could go anywhere this weekend, I would start in Atlanta, in a big air-conditioned car and pick up Grady Doctor and then we'd road trip it down to your place and go on one of your walks with you. Then we'd sit on your porch with some iced tea.
    Yes we would.

  6. Stephanie- Ah yes, but in my dream world, they are new and strange ones.

    Photocat- It was a sleep too deep, for once, for dreams.

    DTG- Of course.

    gradydoctor- I am not sure there is any dancing in me today. But the barefoot part- oh yes- I have that covered.

    Lisa- That would be something, wouldn't it? Oh me. We could solve all the problems of the world, or perhaps just of the heart. Same-same.

  7. I think a getaway weekend with the Moon Man sounds like a good idea. Pick somewhere cool, even if it _is_ only a hotel room. x0 N2

  8. N2- I am actually thinking of the island where the AC works well and the water surrounds.

  9. It sounds like time to get away. I get away as much as I can to the water. No AC but nothing better than water and beach.

  10. OMG, I have no fucking idea what a skink have enlarged my life.

    X Beth

  11. I just love the word skink. Not sure why. I have dated skinks. I'm quite sure of it.

  12. I just love the word skink. Not sure why. I have dated skinks. I'm quite sure of it.


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