Sunday, August 30, 2015

WTF?

I've done it again. I've almost killed myself, weeding in the hot sun. I took plenty of breaks and drank lots of water but fuck if I don't feel like I might die.
Why do I do this? Why do I get so OCD about things that I lose my mind?
My hands are completely worn out. I have the grip strength of a newborn kitten. My forearms are burning from the twisting, pulling. When I close my eyes, I see nutgrass. My knees hurt, my legs hurt, I'm sunburnt.
I'm crazy. That's all there is to it. Just crazy as a betsy bug, crazy as a loon, crazy as an old southern woman who is crazy.
Cue up the gin bottle and nylon slip with the yellowed underarms.
I'm walking around whimpering and here's the stupidest thing- two days ago I was walking around whimpering because I ached so much and felt so shitty. So then I feel better and I seem determined to make myself sick again.
It's not even time to put in the fall garden yet. The watermelons are still going crazy.
I will say this- all that mulching I did earlier in the year sure does make the weeding easier. That is the truth and I want to do it again. I want to have the prettiest fall and winter garden in the world!
I won't.
It'll look just like it always does with some collards and arugula and a few weird looking lettuces.
I sure would like to grow some more of those purple carrots this year though, along with some beets.

I found an old, rusted plow point in the garden today. I always get a bit of a thrill when I find relics from the past around here. I'm not the first person to sweat on this dirt. I also found a few potatoes sprouting from some we missed when we dug them up. I let them be.

I'm going to go make some supper. I'm going to have to drag Mr. Moon in from the garage. He's been out there all day building deer stands. Yes. Deer stands.
He came to check on me at one point and said, "I love to build things."
"I wish you'd build me a table," I said. "Or an outdoor sink."
"I will," he said. "Some day."

Harrumph.

Love...Ms. Moon





13 comments:

  1. oh how I love you.
    You are definitely NOT crazy.
    And you make me crack up sometimes because you are SO normal, well, in my book you are!

    And what's for dinner?

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  2. Liv- Mr. Moon brought home some of the tiniest shrimp ever and then actually sat and peeled them last night. I'm going to make some sort of sauce and with them and serve them over pasta. Should be easy.

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  3. Omg I just love you so much! I needed this post!

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  4. Oh Mrs Moon , I relate to this . Truly we women can be complex creatures.

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  5. Had episode #374 here today of "we are only 60 & 61, how come staying out last night till 11 wiped us out?" And I weed whacked our front yard for 30 minutes last week and both hands were trembly most of the next day, I had to use two hands for my coffee mug. Annoying, tiresome, and frustrating. But dinner came out well and there are leftovers. Good enough.

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  6. Oh, an outdoor sink will be wonderful, we found a plastic one, kinda like one would see in a laundry room and stuck it to the side of the garage over in the chicken yard...himself plumbed it with garden hose all the way from the outside tap on the front of the house...we have to unhook it all for the winter of course. Then I haul water out to the birds in a big watering can, well and the brook only freezes over in the coldest days.

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  7. Honey bunch-I love you so. And I have another Keith thang to send you, aha!!!

    I pulled so many weeds I got tennis elbow, so stupid, and I iced it and took arnica and ibuprofen but I insisted on continuing to weed, swim, live goddammit.

    You just go on being yourself. And we will go on loving you.

    XXX Beth

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  8. Maybe one of those big parasols like they have in holiday resorts....

    Hope you feel better soon.

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  9. I haven't found anything in the dirt around here besides an old diaper pin but I used to dig up all kinds of stuff when I lived in the city...lots of marbles that I kept in a jar. one day my young grandson, who was in the habit of wanting everything and if you wouldn't give it to him he would just take it (I'm pretty sure he lifted a butane pen that blew out hot air for smoothing wax that went missing a few days after he asked me to give it to him), wanted me to give him my little jar of marbles and I wouldn't do it telling him these were mine and I had already given him many marbles. The next weekend or so, the marbles were on the sill of my kitchen window when we left and when we got back it was gone. I was so furious. We had quite the row over it with him insisting he didn't take my marbles. they never did turn up.

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  10. Heartinhand- When are you going to post again? I miss your unique perspective.

    Leisha- Truly, truly.

    Denise- Weeding a garden is ten thousand times easier than what you do every day.

    Cathy H-S- It's sort of unbelievable, isn't it? Well, good for leftovers!

    Big Mamabird- I want a sink with space to wash vegetables from the garden and so forth. It would be so lovely!

    Beth Coyote- We do continue on. I mean, if we stop, we are done for.
    I adore you. Another Keith thing? Oh my god. Thank you.

    Jenny Woolf- I have thought of that. I should try it.

    Ellen Abbott- I have a little jar of found marbles too! Oh. Sometimes littles just can't help but take things. Owen is pretty good about asking if he can "borrow" things. And I generally let him have whatever he wants. I'm a sucker.

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  11. I wonder how long that plow point has been there? Show us a picture! I don't even know what one looks like.

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Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.