I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed this morning and something got into the trash that was outside waiting to go to the trash place and I had to clean that up and that is just not a good way to start a day, much less a week but the sun is shining, finally, and at last, and so we can play outside today and we will.
I have not been sleeping so well but wake up over and over and over again and my dreams are just horrible and I'm feeling like the world's worst mother and am fretting and worrying over things that threaten to overtake me if I let them and I need to stop and just...breathe.
Breathe. Let it go. Be mindful of this beautiful day, the light fully back, the clucking of hens next door, the calling of birds, the richness of my life, this cool, sweet air.
I have a rose vine which I didn't even prune this year and it snakes and climbs and drapes and catches you if you accidentally brush it on your way out to the hen house and year before last I cut it back to the nothing and still it grows and the tiny, baby-pink roses on it are a wonder and they smell exactly like roses should smell.
Here they are.
And now I need to go take the trash and make the bed and get ready for Owen and Gibson and pray that they are not too jacked up on yesterday's candy and let the chickens out and remember to be thankful that this is my life and that it is filled with beauty, both great and small and that all will be as it will be and it is not mine to control the world.
Or something the fuck like that.