Saturday, November 12, 2011

A Killing Frost

I really screwed the fucking pooch last night.
It froze. The ground is carpeted in pecan leaves. They must have all dropped off at once in the night. I am almost surprised the sound didn't wake me up. The banana leaves are that dark-green color of dying chlorophyll lying limp against the stalks.

I didn't wrap or move one damn plant.

I hardly have the heart to go around and look and see what I've lost.

I guess that later I'll take my cart and my clippers and cut everything back and hope that the plants themselves are not truly dead.

Oh well. I wasn't paying attention. And truthfully- some of the plants are in pots so big that it takes me AND Mr. Moon to bring them in. But I could have tried- I could have brought some in, covered the rest up.

And now I have a project. I have cart and clippers, I will wear overalls and gloves. I will spend time outside in the sunshine. It's already warmer out there than it is in here. And by next week, it's supposed to be in the eighties again.

It is good for me to have a project, albeit such a depressing one. I am struggling with this stuff going on in my head. I read an article the other day about how depression may actually be connected to physical inflammation. I believe that. When I am feeling like this, my eyes feel strange, heavy somehow. They do not hurt or ache, they just feel heavy. Different.
And of course there is the need to sleep. There is a lack of appetite. But I just ate an egg with a yolk as golden as the sun from any planet and a piece of toast and I have talked to three people on the phone and every one of them told me they love me and I told every one of them that I loved them and I have thrown some things away and tidied some areas of the kitchen and so I am okay.

I am going to move about the yard in the sunshine, I am going to cut away that which is dead and hope that the roots are good. I am going to be as gentle with myself as possible, physically and spiritually and emotionally. I am going to remember that there is a strong tie between all three of those and that no matter which part becomes ill first, healing can occur from all directions. To treat one aspect is to treat all three.

Yes. That sounds right. And tonight I will put on my serving clothes again and perhaps I will stay for the show but whatever it is that I need to do, I will do because I have been given this gift right now of time to do whatever that is and the quiet to listen to myself to know what that may be.

Does this make any sense?

I hope so.

Love From Florida Where It Surely Froze Last Night...Ms. Moon


  1. Yes, it makes sense. I read that article -- Dr. Andrew Weil, I think -- and have thought about starting that anti-inflammation diet. Interestingly, too, I've also been reading about the spice turmeric and its anti-convulsant, anti-inflammatory properties. I'm thinking about giving it to Sophie.

    Here's to anti-inflammatory thoughts.

  2. It all makes perfect sense, and it is all very good for me to hear. Thank you.

    That's interesting about depression and inflammation. Have a great day!

  3. Ditto about the garden.
    I didn't expect that kind of knockdown frost last night. I guess it's clean-up time!

  4. Seems so early for frost but even we have had a bit of frost on the roof.

  5. no frost here yet. it's another nice balmy day after two days of cold.

    Our biggest error is thinking body and mind are not connected. Of course they are connected! I wonder if depression is the result of some kind of allergy.

  6. Can I just tell you - I find it comforting that you didn't end up covering stuff. Because I always marvel at the industrious people of the world they show on the news, getting their yards ready for frost. If I had a garden, I would totally be the one who didn't know and didn't prepare and then felt lame about it. So in a perverse, possibly-unhelpful-to-you way, your forgetting to prepare for the freeze reassures me that I am okay.

  7. Maybe there is a life-lesson in this. You said it yourself. "I am going to cut away that which is dead and hope that the roots are good." Your roots are good. This depression is so hard but maybe when the frosts come in our lives and when life cuts away things that our dead we can hope (know) the roots are still good.
    That is what I got out of reading this post. I hope my roots are still good when I start to recover.

  8. Yes, first and foremost be gentle.
    I had terrible infestation of whitefly this summer. I did not rinse them off every morning as I should have. I did horticultural oil--but not at the proper intervals. So in fit of frustration, I did pesticide and oil. Mistake. Carnage.

    Mother Nature can be harsh. With our bodies, too.
    That's why we need to be gentle.
    Wishing you all the best. And sunshine.

  9. Physical, spiritual and emotional well-being is so important. Mine has been challenged lately but I am doing okay.

  10. The last couple years I've really started to pay attention to the way I feel depending on my diet. I used to think it was all psychological that I felt bad when I ate junk but I'm now thinking there's a physiological link too.

    Funny how when I'm feeling low I crave the foods that make me feel worse.

  11. Elizabeth- That's the one. I don't think I can do that diet. But it's an interesting idea. I seriously DO think there is a physical component to depression.

    Rubye Jack- I am holding you tenderly in my thoughts. Believe me. I am.

    Food And Brew Love- Amen. And I did. Clean up, that is. Looks all naked around here now.

    Ellen- It was crunch, crunch when I walked outside this morning. Damn frost.

    Ellen Abbott- I have often wondered that too.

    Amna- They predict frost and it doesn't happen and then the predict frost and it DOES happen and shit. What's a girl to do?

    Birdie- Believe me, baby. They are.

    Denise- Thank-you. It was a good, gentle day with lots of sunshine. Just what I needed.

    Syd- I am thinking of you and of all that you have to deal with right now. Bless you, honey. One day at a time, etc.

    Mel's Way- I used to be more apt to eat crazy when I was younger. Lately, food just doesn't seem so important which is why I am not sure about that diet-depression thing. But. I know exactly what you mean. And there is nothing wrong, ever, with eating the best foods we can.

  12. Rudy and Togi and I felt a little frozen Friday night, I can tell you that.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.