Monday, October 15, 2012

Crazier Than Usual

This old lady is going to the dermatologist today. I have a place on my leg that is ugly and getting uglier. It's scaring me to death. And when something is physically going on with me I get anxious. Today the anxiety level is busting the glass on the meter so I'm glad I'm going to get this checked out.

It's times like these that make me realize just how crazy I am. Like...I have a crazy worm inside my head and it's always there, just lurking and ready to burst forth like some cheap damn horror movie and all the locals are running terrified, screaming their heads off as the giant sand worm arises from the ground to catch and eat them all.

Or something like that.

But before my appointment, I'm going with Lily and the boys to the Costco which you know I love more than almost anything so there is that.

I keep thinking about how at the beach one evening when I went into the water and after I got out, May told me that she'd had a plan if a shark had attacked me. She was going to run in the water and beat it in the nose with her fists.
This is somehow comforting, even now.

I'll let you know how it goes.


  1. May, aren't you meant to punch them in the eye? If only we had trained dolphin-friends to sort out these problems for us.

    Good luck at the doc, Mary x

  2. May could advertise that service and make bank. She could likely bomp the crazy worm on the head too, if you need.
    Then again, if you move to a different rhythm, the worms can't get you.

  3. I'd punch the anxiety in the nose for you if I could. I know what it feels like, mine comes and goes with a mind of its own. The infinite number of possible awful things that can happen is never far from my mind. It must be such a gift to have a personality that doesn't dwell on the worries. I'll never know.

    At least you can write about the anxiety, let off a little pressure. It's something at least.

    Hope all goes well at the doctor and you have fun at Costco. I swear at mine you can eat a full meal just from the food samples.

  4. I hate the doctor because it means a stranger will have to get really really close to me (like close enough we can hear/feel each other breathing) and then poke at my insides, but by the time they get close enough to me I'm already sweaty and beet red which makes the whole ordeal plain awful for both of us I'm sure.
    You are not alone in crazy. Not one bit.

  5. Ah, so I see May has a brain like ours. Always good to plan for worst case scenarios!

  6. It's good you have someone to kill your sharks. The worm will get smaller soon and seem funny.

  7. I agree with Angella that May's brain is a beautiful thing (like ours, of course!).

    I'm not much of a one for anxiety, but this is nothing to celebrate as I do, instead, a sort of creative denial.

  8. Jo- Wouldn't that be so, so nice?

    Magnum- I KNEW I should have tried dancing.
    May probably could make bank doing that. She's so awesome.

    Mel- I, too, would give anything to have one of those minds that can shut off the stupid crap. I'm actually thinking of going to a hypnotist.
    And damn Costco! They had hardly any samplers out and one that they did have was for lamb shanks. No thank-you.

    Rachel- That truly helps- to know it's not just me.

    Angella- She does. Poor baby.

    Brother HWB- Already. It's happening already.

    Elizabeth- Oh god. I wish I could do that. So much.

  9. confession: I'm a doctor and I hate seeing the doctor. Being a patient bites. Even when it ends up being nothing.

  10. I go to the dermatologist once a year. He clucks over my being a sailor and marine scientist but so far so good. I have learned to wear a shirt and to slather on sun screen.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.