Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Siri- Where Am I?

I woke up to rain this morning which around here is a good, good thing. I came out to the kitchen and said, "Morning, baby!" but no husband was around.
I said to the walls, "Husband?"
No answer.
So I put on my hat to protect my glasses from the rain and went outside and there he was with an umbrella and the paper, smiling to beat the band.

Husband. Soul.

He can hardly keep his hands off...the new iPhone. This delights me. We are getting old, you know, and it is a good thing when we learn new things, whether lines or technology. There was an editorial in the paper today by a guy about our age who got a new iPhone and he can't figure out shit and he was bitching about it. I understand. I bitch about technology all the time- especially the functions on clocks and ovens and coffee makers. They're STUPID. But the iPhone- SO not stupid. It has occurred to me that although the iPhone is probably marketed mostly to the youngs, it may end up being a godsend to the olds.
Just as we are forgetting everything, we suddenly have access to this auxiliary brain.
"Did you know," Mr. Moon asked me as he was playing with his phone this morning, "That I can say, 'Siri, remind me at ten to call John,' and she will?"
We can literally ask Siri where we are and she will tell us.
"You are in your yard," she will say. "You are going to feed the chickens."
Okay. Maybe not quite but maybe.
Here's another thing I love about that device, especially for my husband- he has always been intimidated to write although I cherish the letters he has sent me over the decades with all of my heart. They are beautiful letters. And here he is- plugging away with the texting to Jessie and to Lily and with every little thing he writes, he will feel more comfortable. In a way, it's astounding to me that we're depending so heavily on texting these days. It's a step BACK in communication, right?
Ah. Not for those of us who love words with all of our hearts.
And no, a text is not a poem or a story or a novel but it could be.
I don't know. I just think it's sort of a crazy miracle, this device. Twenty years ago if you had said, "You're going to have a tiny computer that will fit in your pocket and it will take pictures and movies and allow you to communicate through voice and written word and it will answer your questions with a human voice and it will give you access to encyclopedias and dictionaries and movies and it will tell you where you are and how to get anywhere you want to go and it will tell you the time and the weather and it will keep track of all you need to do and when everyone's birthday is and you will be able to point it to the stars and it will tell you which constellations you are looking at, and, and, and..."
We would have said, "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"


It's just something to think about on this morning in December. I've let the chickens out and two hens are sitting on nests already. Mr. Moon has taken Siri in to work. I wonder what she looks like in Mr. Moon's mind's eye. I bet she has big breasts.
I wonder what my Siri will look like to me.
A goddess, maybe. The goddess of information. Will she tell me what to cook for supper? I hope so. I sort of wish that Mr. Moon and I did not have to eat at all before we leave for Mexico. I am so weary of coming up with things to cook. Frankly, I am not even interested in eating at this point. My belly is a bowl of nerves and I go all day and then suddenly realize that my blood sugar has dropped to a bad point and that I have to eat something RIGHT THAT SECOND and that never works out very well. I am tired of salads and vegetables and I am tired of beans and of meat, both. I am tired of anything that my hand has touched to prepare.

I think I am a bit weary of everything right now and what I am looking forward to most of all about Mexico at this very moment is lying down on a bed with the doors to the balcony open and being able to hear and see the water and sky. Just that. Being in a place that is ours but not ours, everything open to us but nothing required.
Yes. That.

Why does it take so much energy to get to the point where you can relax? I do not know.

But I better get off my ass and start today's busyness in the direction of that relaxation.

Would it kill me, do you think, to get a manicure and pedicure?
I am going to consider this.

And you know what? I apologize for my posts lately. They are pretty darn worthless. I realize that I am doing some fairly serious disassociating and my mind skips along the surface of things like a stone over the water, touch, touch, touch, gone...and it shows here. I know it does.
Well. So it goes.

In just a few days I hope to have mind and body firmly back in the same place, eyes looking out, everything I am seeing, hearing, feeling, tasting, smelling, doing all feeding my one soul.



  1. Don't apologize. This bit knocked me out: lying down on a bed with the doors to the balcony open and being able to hear and see the water and sky. Just that. Being in a place that is ours but not ours, everything open to us but nothing required.

    Heaven. Right there.

    I don't think texting is a step backward. Or at least it doesn't have to be. It's been interesting for my mom and me. We talk in person or on the phone pretty much everyday still, but texting helps us take care of some things in a more non-linear way in addition.

  2. You make perfect sense to me, and all you have had to say has such worth.
    I'm also now dreaming of Mexico :)

  3. Tell that little phone hussy to, "please don't take him just because you can..."

  4. Yes, we want manicure and pedicure. Yes. Now.

  5. Mexico?? I missed this info along the way. How wonderful. Where? I love Mexico. I love the way you describe that luxury of open door and ocean beyond. Oh god lovely.

    And the iphone, okay. I'm sold. You sold me. You better get a commission if it happens. I'm just not sure we have the right kind of internet connection to make it work. HOw does it work in the boonies?

    I've had one manicure in my life, and one pedicure, but not at the same time. I say go for it!

    xoxo dd

  6. You know what? You're feeding my soul, nearly every day. And you've described perfectly what it's like to feel tired of everything. I was thinking yesterday how I'm tempted to start buying all our meals out -- even fast food, because I'm just sick of thinking of what to make and attempting to be healthy, etc.

  7. My iPhone has become an essential appendage. It doesn't replace THE appendage but it is pretty awesome and orgasmic in its own right.
    Yes, to relaxing and yes to doing whatever you want with the hands and feet. It is almost time to fly to your piece of heaven on earth. Enjoy the last few days in your own heaven in Lloyd.

  8. I still look at my iphone with a mind of having a bit of magic in my hands. I am looking forward to swap my 4 into the 4s... So no Siri yet on my phone now.
    It's funny that Mr Moon is so smitten with it.
    A manicure sounds great, have some relaxing things to do and then slowly pack your suitcase and off you go.
    To the Land of ZZZZ. Cozumel. Mariachi. Beach. Happy people!

  9. If you ask Siri whether or not you should get a manicure and a pedicure, I bet she will say yes!

  10. auxiliary brain. i need one. now.

    oh, that Siri.

    don't apologize for your posts, mary. they have been speaking to me loud and clear. i am in the same place but i am not writing much. i think you are braver. writing is the way through.

    love you.

  11. Stephanie- Sometimes I think our fingers can say things that our vocal cords cannot.

    Affirmed- I am not sure who you are but I sure do like your name. Come back anytime, sweetheart.

    Magnum- Not breasts as big as Dolly's! But yeah. Don't do it, Siri!

    Rubye Jack- Manicure no, pedicure yes. It was good.

    21k- Uh, they work on satellite like cell phone? Mostly? I think? Shit if I know.
    Cozumel. Island sacred to the Mayan goddess Ixchel. That's where I'll be.

    Elizabeth- So it's not just me? I swear- I am DONE. For now.

    Syd- I love it when you talk dirty. Sort of.

    Photocat- Three more nights. That's all.

    Denise- Or at least she'd give me a host of options of where to get them.

    Angella- Oh honey. If I wrote EVERYTHING I was thinking, feeling...
    well, there you go.

  12. I love my iPhone and Siri. Just for fun have Mr. Moon say "I love you" to her. She comes back with several pretty funny responses. It's hilarious. I hope you have a great trip. I just got back from a week in Chicago and it reminded me why I like living in Florida.

  13. Oh honey-

    I love your blogs---they're not superfluous or what did you say---worthless.

    Meander away, lamb chop. We, your faithful fans, applaud you.


  14. Lois- Chicago? Yeah, great place to visit.
    Glad you're home.

    Beth Coyote- I surely do meander. Thanks, you sweet woman.


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