Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Renewal Of Sorts

We got a little bit more rain last night and it's so apparent. Amazing how just a small amount can give us all relief. The leaves are shined up and good to go again, perhaps the figs will make it.

Of course, the odds of us getting enough to make a pint of preserves is slim- the squirrels and birds are faster than we are and not as picky about ripeness.

But. There they are and here we are, a morning of relative coolness and it's a joy. The cardinals are flitting about the yard and I can hear a mourning dove (or is a morning dove?) cooing her song.

For who knows what reason, I feel more at peace today. Nothing in this world has changed except for the rain last night and maybe that's all it takes. I do not have that feeling of despair, wrapped around me like the strands of a spider's web, inadvertently walked into.

Elvis walks in and out of the hen house. I fear that my chickens have been traumatized by the fox's visits. Mr. Moon says he will take care of the fox but what are the odds of him being here when Mr. Fox comes 'round, ready with a weapon? I have noticed my eggs are smaller and whether that is because of the stress of the fox or because of being kept cooped up, I do not know. I only know it's true.

Well, the day has begun. It is beginning to warm up, I have taken the trash and recycle, and I am going to town for Kathleen's retirement party. I need to call my mother's doctor's office and see if he has those forms ready that I need to take to the assisted living place. Her doctor is sweet but notoriously bad about form-filling out and I don't blame him. One doesn't enter med school to spend one's weekend filling out forms but it's part of the job, whether he likes it or not. I will be so relieved when Mother is moved. Her memory loss is getting worse by the second. I swear it is. In the space of one phone conversation, I have to remind her of things two and three times because she's already forgotten. I can't begin to understand this. It's just too fast, although I suppose it's been going on for a long time and as my brother says, any normalcy she's displayed lately has been a facade.

"Who took my good china?" she keeps asking me, forgetting over and over that she gave it to May.
And yesterday she told me that my brother had stolen some pictures, taken them home in his suitcase and I had to remind her that she has given me at least some of those pictures. I have them right here. She was so indignant about this supposed theft, too, and I see how bad this could get.

Well. It will be what it is and I need to get ready to go to town.

We go on and today, freshly renewed by the rain which we've had and it's like the reverse of Noah, receiving the olive branch as proof that his god had caused the rain to cease. There is such relief in knowing that the rain's cessation is not something which will last forever. That it comes again and the olive branch, the fig tree, the wild phlox, will all bloom once more.


  1. It's so nice to start my day, here, with you. I'm glad it rained and even more glad that the despair that was wrapped around you seems to have dissolved.

    Love to you --

  2. It's hard, about your mother. I hope she can relax once she's moved, and feel less stressed about it all. I hope it works well for her.

    I'm torn, about the fox. It might have babies! I want you to have your hens too, though... I'm no farmer, as you can see. Too soft hearted to live...

  3. I'm glad the despair has lifted.

    Thank you for the photos of your lovely place. I enjoy them so.

    I love you MAS.

  4. Glad you got rain. We've had only 3 inches in 7 months and now it's 100+ every day and I'm anxious all the time about everything...plants, birds, animals, aquifer, etc.

    Hope your depression stays away and life is good.

    Can you fence the chickens instead of killing the fox? Foxes are so beautiful...

  5. I just wish the fox would go on his / her own and leave you be.

  6. Oh Mary, the day started so well...

    The pictures are lovely, your place is so beautiful.

    When I was a kid and had rabbits my dad built this panelled frame that he made look really attractive with wire between each panel and on top with a trap door type gate. It was about 12 feet by 12 feet. The rabbits could at least run around without worrying about getting eaten. I don't know if this would work for chickens?

    I feel for you with your mother, it probably was a facade. At least you've done most of the arranging and she'll be in her new place soon. I can imagine it's frustrating especially when she can't remember who's she's given all the stuff to.

    It was sunny with a breeze here today. I felt a bit flat so I went for a walk which cheered me up. I have set aside tomorrow and if it doesn't rain I shall definitely mow my lawn and get back in touch with my poor neglected garden. Saying that it has thrived with no help at all. It's like wild English country garden and it looks rather pretty even though the grass is a foot long in places. I need to get back to nature a bit and you always inspire me.

    I love you and love your writing so xx

  7. It is hard to deal with--the memory loss and increasing dementia. I think that with people living so long due to medical advances, there will be more problems with dementia.


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