Wednesday, June 8, 2011

No Title

Very odd beginning to a day.

Mr. Moon was going to get up early, as he does, to go to the gym but every time I looked over to his side of the bed I thought I saw him there so I just kept going back to sleep thinking that oh, he needs his rest, bless his heart and then I would begin to dream again.
There was an audition at the Opera House in this dream and they were going to do the Sound of Music and there were literally thousands of people there. Just swarming with people wanting to be nuns and soldiers and Maria and her charges and I won't go into all of it but Owen was there too and I needed to watch him and I couldn't decide whether to audition- even in Dreamland I know that I cannot sing.


I finally woke up for real and realized that what I had thought was Mr. Moon in the bed was really only a pillow and that yes, he'd gotten up early and gone to the gym and here I was, being lazy and driving myself crazy in the Land of Dreams about whether or not to audition and toting around a baby and a HUGE diaper bag full of god knows what (and don't bother trying to analyze THAT for me, thank-you, darlings, I can do it myself) so I got up, feeling discombobulated and late and lazy and crazy but not too bad.

I am sore today and my foot hurts and I think it's because I wore shoes that weren't Crocs most of the day yesterday and also, the yard work I did yesterday evening was a little brutal. I went out and cut some thorn vines that are as big around as bamboo and pulled them from the trees when I could- some were just TOO wrapped around things up there to get- and cut the pieces up and hauled them away. I sweat like a pig and then it began to rain but not enough to make any difference except that I was wetter than I already had been. Sort of. I was already pretty soaked through with the sweat.

When Mr. Moon got in last night it was already dark but the fox was out at the neighbor's fence and he had a perfect shot but no gun in hand. Mr. Moon talked to the neighbor and they've been losing chickens like crazy. Unlike us, they don't have a secure hen house and coop, the animals just lounge about all day in a big fenced-in area with various places for them to get in out of the sun and the smaller chickens get out of the fence and run around the border areas and I'm sure there are none of those adventuresome chickens left.

Mr. Fox has found his honey-hole and that's for sure.

In a perfect world I'd just leave him a nice big bowl of Fox Chow behind the garage and he'd leave our chickens alone but this is not, my dears, a perfect world. Far from it, although we do live on a planet with an awful lot of water and that's a sort of perfection.

Before we went to bed last night I helped my husband trim the back of his hair with the clippers and I held his head in my hand, or at least put my palm on it as I ran the clippers back and forth and used my fingers to smooth it back down to see where I needed to go next and I hope I die before he does because I couldn't bear to lose him and have that memory, my fingers smoothing down his hair, him sitting in a chair in front of me, his warrior body and head, me kissing the top of his head, him thanking me, this life together, these small moments, his hair in a newspaper in the sink, this dreaming life, his shoulders, his ears, his neck, the crown, the crown of his head.

When you get older, you think about things like this as well as what to make for dinner, whether or not to audition for something, and thus, the mind becomes ever more crowded and no wonder it finally settles on the story of the tool box, the recitation of that which has been given to us and which we now have to let go.


  1. Ah, Mary, that description of trimming Mr Moon's hair is just exquisite. This is what love looks like. Oh yes.

  2. If dad shoots the fox, will he keep the hide?

  3. Angella- And we are lucky who know that.

    DTG- It's a pretty mangy fox. I doubt it.

  4. Aw, I thought Owen could have a fox hat.

  5. I still feel sorry for the fox. He is only hungry, poor soul. I understand how you feel, too--your chickens are like my cats are to me
    --but it still kills me. I'm too tenderhearted sometimes to live in this world.

    I love you Mary Moon.

  6. I hope I die before he does because "I couldn't bear to lose him and have that memory, my fingers smoothing down his hair, him sitting in a chair in front of me, his warrior body and head, me kissing the top of his head, him thanking me, this life together, these small moments, his hair in a newspaper in the sink, this dreaming life, his shoulders, his ears, his neck, the crown, the crown of his head."


    Oh, Sister Moon. I so agree with Angella. Oh yes. Love this. Love you. You rock. Mr. Moon rocks. Love rocks. The fox, not so much. . . .

  7. A gorgeous description of love and its moments.

  8. I have no idea why the neighbors just don't leave their big ass dogs outside at night..? I'm sure this would provide some kind of deterrent.

    I mean they run out to snarl and bark at Harley and me when we feed the goats... I think ole Mr. Fox would be at least a little intimidated by that.

    Sorry about the chickens though. And we have no animal control out here so there's no way to even trap it and move it... although, we did borrow a trap from the humane society to catch the cat living under our house...? Maybe the folks at St. Francis have some ideas about how to deter him?? sigh.

    Well Damn! I hope you have yourself a good day despite our the terrorist in our midst. And THANK YOU for our yummy gifts. I can't wait for dinner!

  9. Oh God. I think about my husband dying before me all the time (he's ten years older)...I don't think about moments like our wedding either; it's those little moments like him grabbing my waist while he's swimming out of sleep that I just know will cause me to grow still and quiet...

    another lovely post, Ms. Moon.

  10. i miss you.
    as this week of auction consumes me. just a quick love note to say i'll be back on my daily wake up with ms. moon constitutional!


  11. Wow. This is an incredible piece of writing, Ms. Moon.

    I had a weird dream, too, last night -- I dreamt I was getting ready to go on stage to read some of my writing, and there were thousands of people in the audience.

  12. And the description of the hair cutting was achingly beautiful and tender.

  13. For a good meal and $20, I'll relocate that fox to my State office, 'cause lord knows this hen house is getting raided like a mofo!

  14. I do that - think that Babes is still in the bed with me. Always very strange when I realise he's not.

  15. The other day I was daydreaming and imagined going on vacation to Florida with my whole family and staying at your house. I pictured us drinking and having dinner and you holding Ever and talking to Lola and making Mr. Curry blush and your tall handsome husband going out to hunt and Ian being so excited because Ian LOVES to hunt and has done so in the summers, and Dakota trying to find out where the cute girls are and me fussing at Dakota because he's being saucy to Lola and then I just felt really happy. One day!

  16. Honey words and thoughts...dripping all the heart of our love for our men...

  17. DTG- Not from THIS fox. Believe me.

    Ms. Bastard-Beloved- And that is why I love you. Among many other reasons.

    gradydoctor- Mr. Moon does indeed rock. All I do is take care of him the best I can and be aware of the gift of him.

    Lisa- Moments. Yes.
    They add up.

    Ms. Fleur- We have chosen to live in this place where there is no animal control. And so it is. Glad you liked the veggies.

    silverfinofhope- There are no promises. We make some, yes, but we have no way to keep many of them.

    rebecca- You are changing the world and as such, you are excused from regular duty.

    Elizabeth- Oh! That's a wonderful dream and you know- it could very well happen. I don't see why not.

    Bethany- He's my sweet.

    Mungam- Ha!

    Mwa- I was trying to be so quiet too!

    Maggie May- Sweetness. One never knows...

    Beth Coyote- Poor things. But we're animals too and so are my chickens. Somehow we have to figure out the living arrangements, right?

    Ellen- And for all of those whom we love so deeply. Yes.

  18. I feel the same way. I cannot imagine my life devoid of my love. It would be too much to bear.

  19. Haha! Not the toolbox again, the running gag is good though.

    You've answered my question from the other day about the chicken run. It's annoying they can't roam free but at least they are safe and you care for them so well.

    What beautiful words about Mr Moon. I know how you feel and I think the same thing too. Love you Mary xx

  20. PS. I've been having really vivid dreams lately too. I don't usually remember them. I think it's the nicotine patches I keep sleeping in! xx

  21. Hahaha... So funny! I suppose you were tired and just needed your rest.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.