Friday, September 23, 2011

Assumptions And Faith And Just Complete Assholiness

I have a terrible, horrible habit of assuming for no reason whatsoever that everyone I meet, if they seem reasonably intelligent, feels the same way I do about things.
Which would be oh, you know- politics, religion, the basics.
And it can be a mistake to think that way. A grave mistake.

No, I didn't make any major faux pas today but boy, I could have. It's so odd to have a group of people, many of them complete strangers, in my house. It's stressful, I have to tell you. First off, my damn dogs keep shitting in the house which is not only embarrassing, but it stinks. Damn fucking dogs. I mean, really. Really? Really.

Secondly, I feel like I have to apologize for everything. The stink, the dogs, the traffic in Lloyd when there's filming going on outside,

the electrical outlets which are name it, I'm apologizing for it.

And it's also stressful because I'm afraid I might say or do something that would offend someone. I'm not as bad about this as I used to be but I'm still pretty worried about it. Luckily, there was a fifteen-year old girl here and so I kept my profane mouth in check for the most part which I was glad of later when one of the actors, a gentleman approximately my age, said that he dislikes profanity.

I did tell him that I love profanity and use it as much as possible but I hadn't actually been DOING that so it didn't seem as bad somehow. And he probably thought that I dislike profanity too, being surrounded in my house by about fifty images of the Virgin in every room. It's so easy to make assumptions. I could completely understand how someone could make quite a few about me from all those Virgins and also the little kid toys and the dog shit and the industrial-sized bottle of Tito's vodka in the kitchen, not to mention the chickens on the porch.
I am not sure what those assumptions would be, but there could BE some assumptions made.

The father of the fifteen year old stayed around for awhile to make sure his daughter wasn't in the hands of axe murders and child pornographers, I suppose, and then he took off to go to a meeting so I assume he assumed we were all right and that she would be relatively safe here. Then I came to find out that he's the husband of a fairly famous writer and now I'm REALLY wondering what he thought of my house and oh, boy. I don't know that I really care, but I do wonder.

But it was a pretty good day. I haven't been a corpse yet. That'll be tomorrow. Or Sunday. Two of the actors were talking and they had never worked with Freddy. They were asking why he did this and why he did that and I said, "Look. I've learned two things about Freddy. One, he is always behind schedule. Two, don't bother to question what he's doing. He always works it out."
And he does.
And whenever I'd get tense today, I'd just remember that and also remember that it's not my fault that there's traffic in Lloyd and I am not the center of the universe and I am just lending my house for this effort and no, it's not a perfect house in any way, but Freddy will use it beautifully and it will work out. I have faith in that. And having faith in that, I can just step back and go collect eggs or hang out and hold something or do whatever it is that needs doing and it's all okay. It's even sort of funny when Freddy says, "Quiet on the set!" and the dogs start barking frantically.
Probably not to Freddy but sort of to me.
When they left today they were on their way to film at the animal shelter and I begged Freddy to take the dogs with him. He refused. So if they shit and bark tomorrow it is HIS FAULT!

And I guess that's all I have to say about that. And I will try for two more days to not assume that people think like me or believe as I do and I will keep my mouth as clean as possible and I will also do the best job I can do pretending I am dead. I did pretend I was dead in Disconnected, but my head was down on a table and so my eyes were not involved.
We'll see. Freddy's a good director and he'll help me be a corpse. I don't just assume that, I have faith in it.

And once again, life has pulled me out of my despair and set me relatively to rights as I assumed it would, or at least distracted me enough for me to get my head out of my ass.

And then has nothing to do with anything but if Rick Santorum and the people who booed the soldier in the video here ever cross my path, you may have perfect faith that I will gladly inform them that they are not even remotely reasonably intelligent. If I was Rick Santorum's mother, I would whip his ass with a hairbrush and cut him out of my will. And those homophobic assholes who cheered him when he made that insane little speech should be ashamed of themselves.

Okay. That's all.

Have a good Friday night, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. It is a poor assumption that people are reasonably thoughtful and enlightened in this day and age. I like to think that some of the people I am around are. But sadly, not enough.

  2. OMG you made me howl with laughter !!
    I LOVE profanity and every room in MY house is filled with Virgin Mary's....birds of a feather :)

    And thank you again for that kind comment today - you have made such a lovely difference in my life !

  3. it's all i can do to keep my swears in check when at work.

    if your filmmaker friend ever wants to make a great lakes zombie movie hook me and tony up. we would so work for free!


  4. liv- Well, here we are. We profane Virgin-Imagers. I wonder what sort of DNA rules THAT shit? Whatever. It is nice to know we are not alone. XXOO

    Mrs. A- Working for Freddy for free is the only way to work for Freddy! We are supporting the arts.

  5. I'm just sitting here with my shoulders shaking, the image of you whipping someone's ass with a hairbrush just about the best image I can think of right now in these crazy times.

    I can't wait to see the new movie and you as a corpse. Although you will have to be the best actress of all time because you have so much crackling life to you, it'd take a real pro - FESHIONAL -- to be Ms. Mary Moon as a corpse.

    And out here in Los Angeles, everyone is always hoping that movies are shot in their houses because you get paid a shitload of money and they clean everything up for you! You need to talk to Freddie about that! :)

  6. I am never surprised by the depths of ignorance I encounter when I venture out into the world, and I am pretty sure there are a lot of people who think I am a jackass. However, I just don't understand how people fall victim to propaganda and outright lies spewed by politicians, and Rick Santorum can go suck it. He is elitist douche bag who preaches discrimination, and most of it is done out of fear. Open your hearts and minds you morons. Sorry for the tirade, Ms. Moon. Good luck with the movie and take care.

  7. Because I live in such a Third Worldy kind of place and there are so many odd assumptions about Africa even in different parts of Africa, I expect blog readers or posters on forums to NOT share my beliefs or views.

    But there is also a great deal of commonality in human nature and sometimes I find kindred spirits -- over the years I've also come to understand the differences better.

    Virgins in every room and lots of prafanity sounds wonderful.

  8. I pretty much assume that everybody in the world is gay, married, religious, and has a bunch of kids, and since I'm a straight childless atheist who runs through men like drinking water in the Sahara, it's always a revelation to find somebody more like me.

    It's not that I *need* people to be like me, but sometimes it's a little treat to not have to explain every damn thing.

    The worst experiences in my life are because of people assuming I think like them - being trapped on a boat with a bunch of racists, that kind of thing. And me assuming that we were more similar than not. I know there are racists, but I shield myself from people who unashamedly vent hate.

    I think it's why I'm most comfortable where it's OBVIOUS that I'm different. I'm very often the only white person in the room, my friends' only white friend. It's not that I reject being "white" (there is so assuredly not one definition of what that means), but it's easier for me if people don't just assume I agree with them.

    With you Ms. Moon, though, I very nearly always do agree! And even when we don't, there's a recognition that we come from different perspectives for a reason. (How you find Bill Murray attractive, I will NEVER know!)

  9. It bothers me so much when some people get so superior about themselves and announce that THEY do not like profanity and assume, therefore, that everyone should just shut up and not offend them. They are only words after all. And not usually hateful but born out of frustration or anger. Perhaps they have lead charmed lives that have not required the use of profanity but why assume that others don't get some release or satisfaction out of saying a few explicit words? Would they rather we get a gun, or a knife and vent with those?

  10. I love profanity too. so I moved to a small Texas town where everybody goes to church. so far nobody has asked me to go with them.

  11. Elizabeth- My entire life is done for love and for free. YOU KNOW THIS BY NOW! And this is Lloyd, not LA. I know, it's hard to tell the difference sometimes.

    Mr. Shife- THAT WAS THE BEST RANT EVER! Thanks. I agree with every word.
    You take care, too.

    Mary LA- Well, Lloyd is sort of like a third world country in and of itself. Maybe a second world country. Ha!

    NOLA- "I'm a straight childless atheist who runs through men like drinking water in the Sahara..."
    Love it! Love you.

    Jeannie- Well, he was a service man in Korea so I guess he can choose whether or not to like profanity as he likes. To each his or her own. I just happen to have been a sailor in a former lifetime.

    Ellen Abbott- My advice would be to continue with the cussin'.

  12. That quote probably encapsulates my essence far too well. :)

    Love you!

  13. Rick Santorum is a horse's ass...and if you'd like a 'definition' of santorum, Google Dan Savage.

    Love and kisses,

    Beth, who lives to swear, Coyote

    PS. With a hairbrush, ow!

  14. The asshole republicans are unbelievable, and I don't care who I offend when I say that. Not one iota.

  15. You are so refreshingly hilarious, Ms. Moon.


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