Tuesday, November 6, 2012


Are you scared? I'm scared. About the election, of course. Mr. Moon just left to go vote down at the Baptist Church which is our local voting venue. I voted last week in Monticello at the place where you vote downtown. It used to be a jail. Now you vote there. I somehow feel more comfortable voting in a former jail than in a working Baptist Church. 
Early voting was heavy here in Jefferson County and also in Leon County, I hear.
I am scared.

I'm so sick and tired of being scared which is how it would seem to me that I spend more than half of my life. I'm scared of just about anything you can think of from shopping for cosmetics to calling people on the phone. Then there are the things which flat-out terrify me- going to the doctor, for instance.

Okay. Maybe I'm terrified today. I'm not going to the doctor but I'm going to see, as are we all, just how insane this nation has become. Please. Let it not be as insane as I fear it might be.

Yesterday Lily sent me a text, asking me if I wanted to go to the fair. It was the night where you pay one flat rate for as many people who can fit in one vehicle to enter and ride. I really didn't want to go to the fair. If it weren't for the fact that my grandchildren were going, I wouldn't have even considered it.
But I do and so I did and we went to the fair.

Owen loved the kiddy rides. He bravely rode the race car and the bumper car and the dinosaur and the stage coach. He liked the petting zoo, too. But his favorite thing, the thing he wanted to do the most, was to catch a catfish.

I'm not kidding you. They have a place where you can go and catch a real live catfish from a big tank with a tiny plastic fishing pole. He'd seen this place when we passed it on our way to something else and it stuck in his mind and he wanted to fish. So while his mama and daddy rode some scary ride together, Boppy and I took the boys back to the fishing place and Owen caught not one but two catfish and then a whole line of onlookers gave him high fives and he walked down that line of guys, slapping skin like he'd been doing it his whole life.
I love him for wanting to catch a real fish.
I don't have a picture of that because I was holding Gibson who desperately wanted my candy apple. Yes, I had a candy apple. Or at least a few bites of it. And yes, I gave Gibson a few nibbles of the apple itself, although not the candy part, and he is a beast who wants to eat ALL THE TIME and while Owen fished, Gibson fought to get to the apple.

I gave him some grits, too. I didn't want any of the food fair. I wanted something cooked by one of the churches. That's real food. Here's the menu of the place where Mr. Moon and I got our supper:

It was great food. I got fried mullet and cole slaw and grits and hushpuppies and they had hot sauce. They fried that mullet when I ordered it. Mr. Moon got...catfish. After we ate, I went back and told the lady who'd taken my order how good it had been. "Thanks," I said. "Thank-YOU," she answered.

That wasn't scary.

Another thing Owen wanted to do was to see the animals. So we did that. I love the animals and in the cattle pavilion, they had this:

Sweet Molly Moo. She is anatomically correct and you can milk her. Again. I am not kidding you. Owen had just watched a woman milking a goat and so he knew how. He milked Sweet Molly Moo. Very seriously.

My heart broke with joy.

So those parts of the fair were good. The parts I didn't like were the horribly crowded midway and all the people. Throngs of people. Billions of people. Okay, probably not billions. But a lot. It was Fellini-esque. You know. You KNOW what I'm talking about. And I don't like it. People crammed together on giant rides that sling them up into the sky while extremely loud music chunks out of speakers and lights flash and then there are those fun houses with people popping in and out of windows and screaming and doors slamming and...no. God, no.

I was tempted to go look at the mermaid. Lily tried to talk me into it.


"You know you want to see the mermaid," she said.
"Not really," I told her.
We didn't go. Owen said it would be scary. I agreed.

Gibson had a great time. Gibson ALWAYS has a great time. Especially when food is involved. Grits, apple. Anything. Plus he had his mama, his daddy, his brother, his grandmother AND his grandfather.

We did ride the Ferris Wheel. That wasn't too scary for me but it was for Owen. He didn't like it very much. Gibson tried to climb out of it. That was scary. Also, it got a little scary when Mr. Moon and I started looking at how it was put together. Oh well. Sometimes you just have to let go and let The Carney. Fuck it. If I die, I die.

We ended up on the Merry Go Round which is the best part of the fair besides the animals in my opinion.

Then we drove home. Owen wanted me to come in the house and see his Power Rangers. "I don't know, Owen," I said. "Mer Mer is pretty tired."
"I help you walk," he said. "I help Mama walk, I help Daddy walk, I help you walk."
Then he fell asleep in the car. He got carried to bed but he woke up and still wanted me to come see his Power Rangers. So I did. I made it on my own. He didn't have to help me walk. Then he snuggled down in his bed. "Are you cozy?" I asked him. "Uh-huh," he said. "Cozy."
We kissed him good night and came home.
We went to sleep and I woke up in the middle of the night and it was raining a little bit. We haven't had rain in so long. It sounded sweet and lovely, falling on the tin roof. Better than anything I heard at the fair. Better than anything I'll hear on the TV or the radio today.
Unless it's when they say that Obama was re-elected.
Then I'll be less scared.

I want to live in a country where we help each other. Owen already knows this is important. Not only did he offer to help me walk, when he was riding in a little race car thing, the little boy sitting behind him was scared and began to cry and Owen spent most of the ride twisted around in his seat trying to comfort him. That made me so proud.

I want our country to make me proud. Again.

There. That's all I have to say right now.

Yours in hope...Ms. Moon


  1. Oh Ms. Moon, this post makes me choke up in the most beautiful way. That Owen. That Lily, a daughter who invites her mom to the fair on the night before the scary day. Grandsons with hearts full of love. This is the very sweetest of posts.

    And yes, I'm scared, too. I truly believe Obama will win, but I worry about the election being stolen. This is the thing that scares me.

    But I'm doing my part! I'm off to vote!

    I love you, woman.

  2. I am getting myself ready to go out to vote for our Obama. I vow not to watch TV until late tonight when it's all over.

    Your time at the fair with your adorable grand children sounds fun. I love that Owen comforted the child behind him. I also like your ornaments in the previous post -- especially the tree one -- and taping the tail on the donkey. I gave up on trying to leave a comment as I could not get thru security! S. Jo

  3. That picture of you and Mr. Moon on the carousel is precious.

    Pleaseohpleaseohplease tell me our country has the sense to keep that misogynistic religious zealot out of office.

    I'm scared too.

  4. We are anxious with you Ms Moon... When it rains in the States it pours in Europe, so we are keeping an eye on things. I think Obama might be the least harmful of two squeeky possibilities... It's high time that we can start to trust our governments again, right now they are making a good mess of it! I love you and Mr Moon on the horse at the fair. Brave!

  5. They say you have to hit rock bottom before you can begin to rise. I guess the question that will be answered today is if we hit the bottom yet. Will we continue to sink or have we begun to rise?

  6. You are one of my favorite people. Truly, really, you are.

    I woke up this morning feeling less scared. Like it would be okay. Harry and I fought the torrential downpour here and took the kids to the polls with us. That Zachary got right into that booth with me. He insisted that I let him push the box to pick Obama, and his face just lit up when that 'X' marked his spot. He marched out and asked the volunteer lady for a sticker because "I just voted for the very first time for Obama!" And she gave him a sticker,too, and shook his hand hard. Isaiah voted with Harry in his booth.He's an old soul so I could tell he was a little worried about how it will all turn out. Then we left, us in front, them in back. Together.

    I pray they remember this day. Going with their mama and daddy to vote for (to use Isaiah's seven year-old assessment) "the one that cares about everybody even the people who are homeless."

    It was perfect. And right. And not scary at all.

  7. I'm scared, but hopeful.

    The fair stories are great and I'm proud of you for going. I hate the noise and crowds, too, but I'm sure the grandsons made it all worthwhile! The photo of you and Mr. Moon on the merry-go-round is precious.

  8. Angella- GW's first "election" is still fresh and painful in my mind. So I understand. I love you.

    S. Jo- Well, I don't actually have that tree one. Billy sent me the picture. He knows me so well.
    I am afraid I am glued to the radio today. Not that it's helping.

    Ajax- That's him exactly. Although he sure has toned down talking about his Mormonism for this election. Hell, that man would obviously do ANYTHING to get elected. Except, oh, make his tax returns public.

    Photocat- I know that who we elect affects the entire world. I hope with all my heart we make the right choice, not just for us, but for our planet as well.

    Ellen Abbott- But didn't we do that with the two Bush terms? I thought so.

    Gradydoctor- That's the way to do it, Mama. That is the way to be.

  9. lulumarie- Yep. I have hope. I sure do. And the only reason I put that picture up of me is because it's only half of me. Haha!

  10. I'm not going to be scared -- maybe a little nervous. It's easier to not be scared in Los Angeles, though, where you're a freak if you vote for Romney. Honestly, those people skulk around in these parts, which probably isn't so nice for them --

  11. Yes, I'm scared. I have a nervous stomach about this election which was only settled for a few minutes after I voted. Errrrrg.
    My grandma had a toy Molly Moo Cow that you could really milk too. I loved that thing.

  12. Yesterday, I was scared. Today, after going to vote and hearing a woman yelling Obama's name in the parking lot made me a little less scared. I'm mustering hope. We can do this.

  13. That Owen. What an amazing sweet child he is. What a good person you just KNOW he will always be.

  14. I'm not scared. I've been holding my breath since Sunday night though.

    I'm more comfortable around a carnival midway than I am almost any place else.

    That of course speaks volumes about me. I don't care though. I totally would have gone to see the mermaid.

    Not scared. To superstitious to be scared. Just holding my breath holding and holding.

  15. I'm so curious about the lines and the whole situation in Florida. I think it's all gonna be okay, though. Breathe.

  16. Thanks for going to the fair. People are nie to each other there usually. Like we're supposed to be. And nobody knows who you voted for or what church you go to.

    Pax on us all.

    XXX in fear and trembling

  17. Fellini-esque - perfect description of state and county fairs.
    I'm scared too...don't know what I'll do if that whack job Romney wins.

  18. I love this post. I love the picture of Mr Moon and Ms half Moon on the carousel in velvet shirt and jeans.
    I could just about brave the Carousel too, anything more wild would scare me . . . which I suppose is the point of scarey rides. But, like you, I spend half of my time scared and need nothing more than day to day banalities to bring on some anxiety. Ah well - sigh.

  19. I am up here hoping, hoping, hoping.

  20. Beautiful fairground post. Owen catching his fish and slapping hands... gah. Gorgeous.

    I'm fucking terrified too. But I have no interest in tenterhooks, I'm going to sleep, will wake up in the morning and see if the beginning of the end is nigh.

  21. Elizabeth- Yes. I would imagine that I have a different perspective here in the Deep South. Here's a confession: when I was driving to town and back today, every Romney sign I passed got a heartfelt finger by me raised in disdain. I let my Southern Lady manners go and let 'er rip.

    Lora- Oh. My. I wonder if I could find a Molly Moo for Owen. Although his mother right now is slightly desperate to find a place to live with enough property for two goats that she can milk. And Owen could help her.

    Rachel- I hope, I hope, I hope. I do so hope.

    Jill- Well, he sure has started out that way.

    Madame King- Well, you can have the midway. I'll take the barns with the animals and their shit. Between us, we have it covered. I know you're not scared. You are the bravest woman I know.

    Betsy- I think so many people in FL early voted that the lines were not so bad today. Mr. Moon got in and out easily.

    Beth- This is true. The fair is the Great Leveler. We all vote for fried dough. We all love the light.

    Lucy- Hopefully, neither you nor any of us will have to figure that awful shit out.

    Bugerlugs- I always think of Emily Dickinson. We who stay close to home can see the beauty right here and report in on it. Maybe that's important. I hope so.

    Birdie- Thank-you, Sister In Canada!

    Jo- Well, this election will affect you but not quite so directly or immediately. So sleep well. Thanks for caring. I mean it.

  22. Ha on let FO and let the Carney. I don't really trust rides put together by people who don't brush their teeth.

    Also, hoping for the President.

  23. I love to see that photo of you smiling! And yes, I was terrified all day yesterday. Terrified, but hopeful, and so proud and glad that I live in a blue state.


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