Friday, September 11, 2009

Another Day, Another Diatribe


Yi-yi-yi! It's Friday and there's so much to say and so little need to say it.

That's life, ain't it?

Where to start? Well, a local 12-year old girl who loves the right-wing radio talk show dudes did a winning speech on Freedom and won first place in the Tropicana Public Speaking Contest and now hundreds of thousands are watching it on Youtube.

Not me. You bet not me.

I won one of those things once and I can't even remember what it said because you know what? I didn't know shit about freedom in those days. I realize I probably still don't because I've never been denied it but I'm pretty sure it doesn't have anything to do with what little Sara thinks. She was inspired, by the way, by Sarah Palin's Republican National Convention speech.
Talk about indoctrinating the young.
Oh well.

Then there's the lady who's getting up a petition in the state of Florida to get an amendment to our constitution giving "personhood" to fetuses because that would make abortion murder. She was inspired by The American Rights League, a 30-year old Catholic group which says "it is committed to the protection of all innocent human beings from the moment of creation to natural death." This lady, however, doesn't go along with the natural death part (and WHAT is natural death these days? I don't think anyone knows) because she believes in the death penalty.

This is what the Tallahassee Democrat quoted her as saying today:

"The death penalty is a judgment as a government, where they have that jurisdiction for punishing people who have done something bad. I would say that is consistent with their responsibility."

I think this lady may have been inspired by Sarah Palin too but that was not mentioned.

Okay. Something bad. And let me ask you this- JUST HOW DO WE KNOW ALL THOSE FETUSES ARE INNOCENT? HUH? THEY COULD BE IN THERE FORMING WINGS AND HORNS AND SPIKED TAILS AND RED SKIN AS FAR AS WE KNOW! They might be absorbing their twins. They could be thinking about wool or manikins in an erotically unnatural way. Just check out Ms. Sarcastic Bastard's blog if you have no idea what I'm talking about. She should get an award for public education. I swear to God.

Obviously, I find this whole argument absurd.

Moving on to the closer-to-home, Lily was interrogated by her ultrasound doctor yesterday as to why she didn't want a C-section. WHY? he kept asking.

We are lucky Ms. Moon is not feeling up to her normal self or that doctor would have gotten an earful.

The midwife, on the other hand, a woman who has delivered a lot of babies and who has had six children of her own at home said, "Well, he just doesn't understand."

The doctor is concerned that Lily's baby is getting too big. We have already discussed this. I feel no need to discuss it further.
Meanwhile, Lily and Owen are fine as frog hair and Owen is dropping down farther, putting pressure where pressure needs to be, right on schedule.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Babies come. Big ones, small ones. Big mothers, tiny mothers.
Vaginas are amazing.

And I guess that's all I want to bitch about. Okay. I lie. There's a lot more but really, I have a life and also, I have so much not to bitch about. I have an extra bag of coffee in my cabinet! I have spare paper towels! I have fourteen chickens! One of which lays eggs! (As proof, see the picture above which I took not five minutes ago!) I have friends! I have kids who crack me up and make me weep with the wonder of being related to them! I have a husband who comes home every night!

I have a Sleep Number bed! Not to mention running hot and cold water, indoor plumbing and air conditioning. And electricity to run all that great stuff.

So yeah. I got it good. And I'm not kidding.

And I live in a country which, although vastly imperfect, still legally allows a woman the freedom to decide what to do with her very own uterus and the contents therein. And a country which elected a president who can speak English. Really, really well.

Happy Friday, y'all.
Love....Ms. Moon

P.S. I would suggest you avoid doing bad things. This could prevent having an unnatural death which would really suck. It's consistent with your responsibility.

32 comments:

  1. Vaginas are something else, aren't they? I am eagerly awaiting Owen here in Buttfuck, Ohio.

    A Sleep Number bed? OOOHHH, I am SO JEALOUS. You live in Nirvana, sister.

    SLEEP NUMBER = NIRVANA

    Thanks for linking to me. It makes me proud to be associated with your blog.

    Love you MOST,

    SB

    ReplyDelete
  2. On top of all the other amazingly wonderful things you have, you also have a psychic connection with some lunatic in Idaho who keeps having dreams about you and yours. In my dream last night, Lily and Owen were both lovely and fine, and healthy. And also in my dream last night, your house was very comfy and cozy and beautiful, thank you for letting me house-sit for you.

    Clearly I need a vacation, or to stay away from CNN AND NPR for the next two days, because I am cracking up.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I wonder how one has an unnatural versus natural death? Isn't death the same thing either way?

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think an unnatural death involves more plastic.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Ms. Bastard- Yep. The Sleep Number bed is pretty all right with me. And Mr. Moon too. So are all-cotton sheets. Bedding is one of the most important things in life. Duh. Pillows included.
    And no, you do not love me most. I am older so you just can't.
    Love you!

    Kori- I must represent something to you which no doubt is based not on reality but your idealized version of reality. Which I find delightful! My home is actually very cozy and comfy and it is beautiful (to me) and you may house sit any time. You come down here for vacay and Mr. Moon and I will go somewhere else. Of course, not any time soon. I can't leave my grandson. I wonder how old I'll be when I CAN leave my grandson?
    Oh dear.
    Anyway, I love you for dreaming of us here in our little village, our little world.
    Oh- suggestion- go to the library and check out some Garrison Keillor books on CD or whatever you listen on and listen to them instead of the news. I recommend the ones which are all News From Lake Wobegon because you will be so soothed, listening to them.

    Marsha- I think unnatural death would be like getting killed by a car or a murderer or oh, yeah, the STATE. Also, to me, it is being allowed to linger far past the time when death would occur if not for the use of respirators and other life-sustaining equipment which will, in the end, not PREVENT death, but will cause it to happen in a highly medicalized, unnatural way.
    Which is the way most of us go now.

    ReplyDelete
  6. DTG- Well. Of course. That is it exactly. More plastic. God, you're smart.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yay for vaginas!

    Lily is being very brave to stand up to her doctor. I hope the birth is everything she's hoping for.

    I had big babies, too. It's the heads that are the annoying bit anyway. The rest seems to pretty much slip out. I'm glad no one pressured me to have a c-section, because I'm not sure if I would have felt secure enough to make the right decision.

    Sending many good wishes to your daughter and grandson, and the new grandmother of course, from afar.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm past the age of squeezing a baby out of my vagina, but I hope to use if for something, sometime before I die a (hopefully) natural death.

    ReplyDelete
  9. The doctor said WHAT?! Oh, let me at him. Asshat.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Aaaack to stupid human mouthpieces. Is everyone getting dumber or is it just me? And doctor know-it-alls! The more doctors I meet, the more I'm glad I'm watching my own back! They only know what they know, ane that's not nearly enough sometimes.
    Amen to the gratitude for plumbing, pretty eggs, comfy sheets, love.
    Best of luck and good wishes for the new baby and mama! I miss the smell of babies...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Owen! That is a fine, Celtic name. I heartily approve.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I hope that Owen makes his appearance without a lot of fuss and intervention.
    I'm not using my vagina much these days, but I remain optimistic. sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Thanks for everyone understanding my side of things. Sometimes doctors sure know how to make you feel selfish for doing things naturally. Oh well I know i can have him naturally, if my momma can do it I can do it. She is really tiny compared to me! Love you mom.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I love vaginas, especially mine.
    (funny how Firefox doesn't know 'vaginas' is a word. can't we have more than on in one place? i should write them a letter.)

    The hypocrisy the nutjobbys exhibit is mind-boggling. But dammit if you point it out to them or their minions/cohorts/sheep or you're labeled a Commie or Heathen. Which, considering the source, I'd proudly take the label.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Mwa- Thank-you, dear girl. Are you feeling better?

    Ms. Lucy- This is why you can't quit blogging. We must know what happens with your vagina!

    Nola- Can you go with us to our next appointment?

    Ms. Mel- I can't wait to smell the velvet back of my grandchild's neck. Ah....

    Ms. Jo- Really? Good.

    Rachel- I have high hopes for your vagina. Thank you for the good wishes.

    Lily- Do you see how many people care about you and your baby? You have an entire community out there. And Owen will get here one way or another and I have no doubts about your ability to birth him naturally if at all possible. I love you and am so proud of you I can't even begin to tell you...your mama.

    Angie- Girl. I can't wait to meet you.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Oh the hypocrisy. Abortion is a sin, but the death penalty is justice.
    I. don't. get. it.
    The arrogance and self assuredness is astounding to me. All I know is that the older I get, the less I know. And I know EVEN LESS about what's right for OTHER PEOPLE
    I do know that you have an awfully pretty house, though

    ReplyDelete
  17. for once i'd like some kid who's not a parrot to the right wing to win one of those things....


    i have no problem with people who respect LIFE. my issue with the pro-lifers et all is that they don't seem to give two shits about LIFE once the baby comes out of the vagina. i respect ALL life as well as peoples CHOICES and it has nothing to do with any tone of god or brand of religion, it's commom sense and darwinism all at the same time- we have to care about one another to ensure survival of the species!

    hope all is well for your lily and these last few days of pregnancy stir craziness will go quick for your family.

    xxalainaxx

    ReplyDelete
  18. Michelle- I am completely with you. I don't know shit and the older I get the less shit do know. But yes, I live in a very pretty house.

    Miss A.- Can I call you that? I can never spell your name, even though I do find it funny.
    Yeah. Unborn- sacred. Born- get up and take care of yourself because WE WON'T.
    Thank you for your good wishes for Lily.

    ReplyDelete
  19. You note that the woman in Florida has a bit of inconsistency in her views on the sanctity of life, and I happen to agree with you. I wonder, however, if you noticed your own inconsistency. You refer to the "choice" a woman has concerning her uterus and the contents therein, but in the same post refer to the contents of your daughter's uterus by a name, as though it were not merely contents, but an actual human being. My question is, at what point did your daughter's child cease to be "contents" and become human? Or is it human because it is wanted (and therefore not human if it were not)? I'm really trying to understand the mindset of those on the other side of this issue, so your input would be helpful...

    ReplyDelete
  20. Debi- I really don't want to get into this debate. My opinion about abortion is this: If you don't believe in them, don't get one.
    Let others determine what is right for themselves. An acorn is not an oak tree. A fertilized egg is not a bird. An embryo is not, in my opinion, a human although the potential is certainly there. It is a human embryo, not a dog embryo or a shark embryo.
    On that we can agree.
    The Bible says, "Thou shalt not kill." This can be viewed as injunction against abortion but it can also be viewed as an injunction about going to war where actual living human beings ARE killed. Often the very most innocent of humans.
    You see what I am saying?
    There is no black and white in this argument.
    That's why I believe in choice.

    ReplyDelete
  21. You didn't really answer my question...

    ReplyDelete
  22. The answer to your question is different for every mother. That's why they have that choice open to them.

    ReplyDelete
  23. DTG- Thank-you.

    Debi- And I will never answer your question to your satisfaction because you don't really want to know what I think.

    ReplyDelete
  24. I do actually want to know what you think. What I want to know is when your grandchild ceased to be a potentially inconvenient blob of tissue and became a member of your family.

    ReplyDelete
  25. Do you think a question like that can be answered in a few written words? That's the sort of question that needs face to face discussion, preferably with something to drink and maybe some food.

    And, frankly, what mama thinks about Lily's fetus hasn't got anything to do with what Lily thinks and her actions concerning being pregnant. Again, that's why the choice is important.

    ReplyDelete
  26. DGT- I love it that you defend me. You're my shining hero-knight of the internet. Thank god you weren't just an inconvenient blob, huh?

    ReplyDelete
  27. Well, if I had been, I suspect I would not have known otherwise.

    ReplyDelete
  28. DTG- I'm fairly sure you're correct in that assumption.

    ReplyDelete
  29. My point really wasn't to get a solid answer, but to encourage those who think abortion is OK to think about the question and its implications. If you tend toward an answer like "as soon as I knew she was pregnant", then how can you tell another woman that her child is less than yours, or your child's child? Every life is precious, and should be treated so.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Debi- "My point really wasn't to get a solid answer, but to encourage those who think abortion is OK to think about the question and its implications."
    Yeah. See. Somehow I knew that.

    ReplyDelete
  31. You have a Sleep Number bed? Well, Hell's Belles! I didn't see that coming.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Ms. Windy- Yes. I have a Sleep Number bed. We have had it for years. When one sleeping partner is six foot nine and outweighs the other sleeping partner by a lot (not as much as I wish, though) a Sleep Number bed is heaven sent. Believe me.

    ReplyDelete

Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.