Tuesday, July 12, 2016

Thou Shalt Not Take Thy Lloyd In Vain

I tried to kill myself today although not really. I waited until it was good and toasty out there to walk and decided to go the sidewalk route today which is hotter than the woods-and-meadow route but easier on the feet with less chance of contracting a tick-born illness. 
Oh, you stupid bitch, Ms. Moon!
I got to the county line which is one mile from my house and where the sidewalk ends and decided to just keep going, maybe up to the little bridge which is one and one half miles from my house and I did get to within sight of the little bridge but by then I knew I'd screwed the pooch and turned around, praying I'd not slump over and die from the heat. 

I did see these. 

And then got in closer to see that two of the black-eyed susans were wearing bees like matching accessories.

Can you see them? 

I also saw swallow-tail kites, soaring high, high up in the blue sky, always a wonder to behold but my feelings of imminent death made them a little less interesting. 

As I was within a third of a mile of home, I passed a church where a man was outside painting. He waved and held up a finger and ran into the church and so I stopped, standing in the sun, until he came back out with two cold bottles of water. He tried to give me both but I only took one, saying, "I'm almost home. Thank-you so much!" 
And then he hugged me, his body as sweaty as mine and said, "God bless you!" and I, standing there in his hug, said, "And God bless you too!"

And by the power of will and water I made it back to my shady yard, took off my shoes and my pants and got into the kid pool and all was well with the world again.

Well, relatively. Summer is going to try and kill us here no matter what. The tiny ants that somehow find their way to my personal body to sting me have arrived again and Mr. Moon has such horrible poison ivy that I'm not sure how he functions. I'd be in the emergency room whereas he's down at the auto auction in Orlando which is a whole other sort of hell, about a million acres of asphalt and cars. 

What can you do? Sit on the porch and drink water and find the tiny ants and squish them and wonder where in HELL they come from and listen to the rooster talking to the rooster next door and occasionally go get in the little plastic pool and plan a trip to the river and hang out the clothes and be grateful, be grateful, be maxima grateful for cold water and for its application both internally and externally and for strangers who look out for you and call down blessings upon you from their god and for air conditioning and ice cubes and refrigeration and also for babies who learn to clap their hands and for their mamas who send you videos of said hand-clapping and for the joy of all of that and more. 

The swallow-tail kites soar on the thermals of heat and we can only do our best to do the same.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. Be careful out there, Mary Moon! You have all those little grandkids relying on you to do so! Poison ivy doesn't sound like much fun at all, poor Mr Moon.

  2. I thought the church man was going to bring you a free bible or a pamphlet. The water was a thoughtful thing to do.

    I don't know how you live with all those creatures biting and stinging you. I don't like to squash bugs, I really don't but they all deserve to be squashed.

    I hope Mr. Moon feels better soon.

  3. jenny_o- There is part of me that probably hopes that when I die I'll just keel over. Perhaps this is simply testing.

    Birdie- This guy was a good Christian- he gave me what I needed! Okay, the hug was more than I needed but I appreciated it to a vast degree. And honey- these ants are tiny. Like a pencil point. Smaller than fleas. I think their entire bodies must be made of stinging potion. When you smush them, they sort of just disappear.

  4. I guess you could have done without the sweaty hug, but it sounds like a lovely moment even so. Getting in the pool was a great idea.

    Can we see the video? *pretty plz*

  5. Weather victims, you and I .Come and visit and you will see what I mean!

  6. It's effing 107 here today. I want to step into the fridge.

  7. Jo- It probably saved my life, getting in that pool. It was so cool and brought my body temp down quickly. Felt like heaven.

    Angela Lambert- I loved that post. Wish I had a piece of that cake, too.

    Ashley- It only FEELS like 107 here. Owen tried to get in my refrigerator the other day. Then the freezer. I would not let him. Mean Mermer.

  8. it is so hot. I'm setting up the pool today. had it up and ready to fill and saw right away it had a little hole so I had to patch it. you must have looked like you were ready to keel over. I remember one time I was so hot I stripped down and jumped into a clear pool off the river in front of the group of friends I was camping with. had been out hiking and climbing in the trans-Pecos region and all I could think of was getting into that cold water as fast as I could before I keeled over myself and for some reason I didn't want to get my clothes wet. I did not notice the two people sitting over to the side or I might not have stripped down. a few more joined me for an impromptu skinny dip though one of the guys wouldn't take his boxers off. I did shock the shit out of everybody though. it was stupid about the clothes though. in that desert air they would have dried in no time.

  9. I. Would. Die. Being Canadian and all. Hell, it's too hot for me today and it's only 28C!

  10. Beautiful post, Mary. God bless that nice man for being nice to you.




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