Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Tell Me Something Good (And I Won't Believe It)

My dreams had a theme last night. I was in Mexico but it wasn't my Mexico, it was some weird 80's movie version of Mexico and it was all bizarre and ridiculous with things like ancient Aztec spells and I was in some sort of travel group (nightmare in and of itself) and every time I'd wake up and think, boy, that was weird, I'd go back to sleep and have the next installment.
It was enough to make me rethink sleep as my favorite activity.

And I'm in a mean mood this morning. It's a perfectly beautiful day and I have a million things I should be attending to and I don't want to do any of them. The yard needs attention badly. All of summer's growth is tattered and done and I need to pull and cut and haul and pile the detritus and the garden is a shame and a sin and if I was a normal human being I could paint a bathroom, at least. But I feel so gloom-and-doomy that I just want to jump off a bridge and get it over with and that's not a good way to feel.

I saw this magazine cover in the grocery store the other day

and dammit, why can't I ever do that? No. I can't wake up slim. I wake up mean as a snake and it's a good thing no one's here to bite.

Well, I guess I'll stop now and go take a walk. And if the damn Sheik crosses my path and tells me that I'm out late today I might just smack the crap out of him.

I'd say good morning but it's just not.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. Good god--don't paint a bathroom, whatever you do. I tried that and it was a fucking nightmare.

    On a brighter note...the day is beautiful Go sit by the chickens and contemplate your navel. Or something. It's raining and cold and dismal as fuck here.

  2. Sit on your porch with a good book. That's what I would do. Oh, and no guilt allowed.

  3. They can fuck right off with their wake up Slim, Mary. You're well within your rights to wake up pissed off and lardy.

  4. Akannie- If it was less beautiful here today, I'd feel more appropriate.

    Angella- Sigh. I might actually go buy my husband new underwear. Sounds fun, right?

    Jo- Haha! Lardy is right.

  5. I decided in the bathtub last night that I think that MAYBE my life has taken a very wrong turn because I made a piss poor decision to go into government relations. And if I hadn't taken an internship my junior year, and if I hadn't decided on this being my particular path, I wouldn't be so tied and bound to DC. And what if, what if, what if.

    SO yeah. It was that kind of night and it's still this kind of morning. Off to a conference call. Argh.

  6. How about this?


    Yep. Some mornings are like that.

  7. Wouldn't you like to know the person who bought that magazine with the hope that she'd wake up slim? It would probably be either the purest or dumbest soul in America.

    Love you, honey.

    Denise- Dang. That girl plays a real mean banjo. She's awesome! Thanks!

    Elizabeth- Hope springs eternal. For some.

  9. Ah, I understand waking up cranky. It's a family trait, and my daughter gets it sometimes too. I think it should be allowed, to feel what you feel and let it out. I'm sure we make up for it in our nicer moments.

    What Elizabeth wrote cracked me up :)

    I'd use underwear buying as an excuse to get out of the house, despite the potential for being more pissed or depressed by shopping. Sometimes it's good to have a goal and accomplish it, no matter how small. And buying your hubby some new underwear, a mean snake wouldn't do that small but true act of love. xo

  10. Those fucking magazines have the power to make us all cranky. Actually, I just took a closer look at the cover and now I am in a bad mood!

  11. My husband's grandfather was named Slim - maybe the story is about waking him up? No?

  12. My dear, don't jump off a bridge. So very many people love you so.

    I wake up mean as a snake sometimes, too.

  13. You sound as bad as me in the mornings. I can only imagine how bad I'd be if I woke up in a tour group. Hell on earth springs to mind ....

  14. Still painting here. WTF--can't wait for it to be over. But the results are spectacular.
    Planted some beautiful blackberry vines. My others died because Ty Ty Nursery is terrible and a bunch of rip offs. But the plants that I ordered from the nursery that shipped my blueberries are beautiful. Happy to think of fresh blackberries in the future.

    No bridge jumping allowed!

  15. Mel- I agree about the goals for sure. They do help, if they are achieved.
    Mine are always just so..achievable.

    Birdie- Who buys that shit?

    The Bug- Uh. Maybe!

    Ms. Vesuvius- I think it is a human trait. Sometimes we just wake up mean.

    Wayne- NO KIDDING!

    Syd- I can plant things but I can't paint. This is the truth. I am very happy that you got good vines. Blackberries are so wonderful.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.