Sunday, November 17, 2013

Complete And Utter Mystery (Too Much Nature)

Mr. Moon got home and was in and out the back door, bringing stuff in from the truck and I was laying on the bed, reading.
All of a sudden, he called to me.
"Come here!" he said. "Now. You have to...I can't explain...just, come here."

I had no idea what I was about to see but I knew from his voice that it wasn't something normal. Not even normal for around here like chicken eggs in the potted ferns.

I got to the kitchen door and he was standing there holding the screen door open. "Look," he said, and pointed.

A turtle. A weird, mud-caked turtle with a pointed nose.
At the top of the steps. 

We both stood there and boggled. Words failed us. We tried.
"How?" "Why?" "Did someone...?"
We had no idea. Like I said, my husband's been in the yard and through that door for the past two hours and saw no one. The dogs haven't barked. They're blind but they can still hear and are a fairly reliable alarm system. So, the theory that someone dropped it off for us is not a very valid one. Just in case, though, Mr. Moon texted our across the street neighbor. "Did you leave a present by our back door?"
It's a Florida softshell turtle. It is almost entirely aquatic (can you see its little fins?) and it only comes out of the water to "bask and lay eggs."
It ain't basking today. 

The chickens too, were mystified.

They couldn't figure it out either. I called my go-to guy, Hank. He laughed and laughed. "I have no idea," he said. His only theory is that for some reason the turtle had left his (her?) watery abode and found itself in my yard and climbed the steps to get at the toad who lives there. Or maybe one of the many lizards or skinks.
But seriously? Can a turtle climb steps?

Oh, who knows? Another Lloyd mystery. He crawled over to the edge of the little porch, obviously looking for a way off. 

Mr. Moon came and carefully lifted him up and set him on the ground. 
"The water's that way," he said, pointing. 

Dear god. 

I hope it makes its way home. 
I just checked, it's disappeared. 

Life in Lloyd. Always something. 


  1. You should have offered him a snack. A little ground meat perhaps?

  2. Maybe he reads your blog :) Was just visiting...

  3. Sylvia- It's a "snorkel" nose.

    Mr. Downtown- I did. I offered him some sliced turkey. Of course. But Luna The Cat came and snatched it away from him. I am not kidding you.

    Jo- I thought that myself. I swear.

  4. turtles are actually very good climbers. you would not believe.

  5. I've never seen a turtle like that!

  6. You are so often chosen by the Animal Gods whether you accept them into your heart like Jesus or not. They know where goodness lies. You have a good heart, Mary. This proves it.

  7. WTF?! How did that dude get to the top of the steps? Or dudette. That is crazyweirdness and a total mystery. Ha ha ha ha.

  8. Oh yes, they climb. I've watched Ellen Abbot's videos of her resident turtle, Big Mama. Now, what was the little guy looking for on your porch?

  9. Oh good lord, I never saw a nose like that on a turtle! Or, come to think on it, on any other creature. We get little baby turtles (turtle-ettes?) crossing the lane in spring, so of course, I stop the non existent traffic and escort them to the other side. And we have snapping turtles, but that's it, I think.

  10. Ok, you know me and critters but that was the coolest thing I have ever seen, I think I agree with Rebecca. Sweet Jo

  11. You're like Snow White or sumpin'!! LOL!

  12. Sounds like a very lost turtle! Glad he found his way back.

  13. I thought I knew my nature pretty well, but I've never known a turtle to climb steps to come a calling. Amazing. Your home is haven to so many creatures besides the humans. Hope it found the water and enjoyed the visit.

  14. Okay, the way I figger... it's either your animal spirit guide or his name is Vinny the Shell and the mob sent him. And I'm not so sure that spirit guides have beady little eyes, but let's keep our fingers crossed.

  15. Ellen Abbott- I believe now. I just wish I'd seen the climb.

    Elizabeth- The wonders of evolution.

    Radish King- I was wondering if he wanted me to fry him up a deer burger or something. I always suspect it's my food the animals want rather than my heart but your words warmed me. Thank you, sweet woman.

    Gradydoctor- Your boys would have loved him. Or her.

    Joanne- I have no idea what he or she was looking for but when we got home last night the toad was still there so we can eliminate that possibility.

    Mrs. F With 4- Thank you for coming by and commenting! I am constantly amazed at the wildlife we have around here which I am still, after a lifetime of living here, ignorant of.

    Sweet Jo- It sort of creeped me out. It's shell was really soft. And it's neck, when it stretched it out, was really long. ARRRGGHHHH!

    heartinhand- Where are my seven tiny men who will do my bidding?

    Jenny Woolf- Yes. Lost. That's what I would say. Maybe going from one low-lying area to another?

    Mel- Mr. Moon suggested that perhaps we could let it come in and stay to eat the mice. I nixed that idea.

  16. Nancy- He did have beady little eyes! Our neighbor suggested he was an omen. Then he said, "Wonder what that means?"

  17. I too was thinking he reads your blog and wanted to be part of a post.

    I haven't read blogs for a few days and I an happy to read that your love has returned to your side.

  18. Totally ancient looking, that turtle. And the nose is like some kind of Pinocchio turtle. It must lie around a lot--LOL.

  19. Birdie- As much as I hate to admit this- I am not myself when he's not around.

    Syd- I get it! Funny, dude. I thought you'd have some thoughts on how he got up my steps.No?

  20. No! That thing could NOT have climbed the steps up to your porch. I just can't believe it. I hope he made it back to the water!

  21. OMG, Florida. You and your critters. You freak me out.

  22. This is a strange turtle! Its nose is


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