Sunday, June 2, 2013

One Of THOSE Sundays

Well, it's Sunday and one of those Sundays where I feel rather leaden, not Sabbathy at all and the sky is iffy and I'm tempting fate and trying to make it rain by hanging clothes outside.
Yes. I do laundry every day. Multiple loads. Yes, there are only two of us living here. Don't ask me to explain because I don't understand it myself. But thus it is, thus it has ever been, and thus it will be.

Anyway, I think I dreamed of the Asshole last night and had other dreams, the themes of which are so well-known to me that they have become nothing more than dreary and boring. Perhaps they are what have set the tone for this day. I do not know but it feels like Sunday and not in a good way. We've had our pancakes (apple, peach, sweet potato, pecan and flax- I know you need to know this) and I've cleaned up and Mr. Moon is back out to attend to his project and I am feeling grumpy with a small slice of bitter on the side about his projects which never seem to involve things which I need or want and I tell you this not to complain about him but to remind you that yes, I am human as hell and so is he and in many ways, we are completely typical of any long-term marriage although of course, being human, I like to think of us as unique and special. I am quite sure that if pressed, he might well admit that there are plenty of things he wishes I would do rather than spend so much time sitting here writing and reading.
Probably scrubbing the mildew in his bathroom, for one thing.
Ah-lah.
Well, not all dreams can come true.

I have no idea what I'm doing today besides hanging laundry on the line and hoping for rain. There is plenty to be done in both the house and the yard but I do not feel especially inclined to do any of it. I feel that there is, however, no way to escape the fact that the kitchen and laundry room need mopping and so I shall probably do that but so what? So what, so what, so what? Who will even notice and who will even care?
No one but me. And so, in a sense, why do it?
Fuck if I know.

Oh wait. I had threatened to talk about side boob today.
Hmmm....
Let me peruse the Huffpost Celebrity section. Hold on...

Nope. No side boob today. However, I did look at the "Celebrity Bikini Bodies Over Age Fifty (Photos)" and now I just sort of want to either
(a) Kill myself now and get it over with, or
(b) Poke certain over-age-fifty celebrities in the eye with a very sharp, pointed object.

Or perhaps, first (b), then (a).

With the exception of Rita Rusic (and who the HELL is Rita Rusic?) because she obviously needs to have a chat with her plastic surgeon.


Okay. I looked her up. She appears to be a woman who likes to wear bikinis. A lot.
Good for her.

In local news, Miss Baby, my sweet little banty hen, appears to have gone broody. Mr. Moon reports that she is sitting on her eggs on a top shelf in the pump house (a place I can't even see without a ladder) and I am in a bit of despair over that situation. As far as I know, the poor dear has never once known a rooster in the Biblical sense and so she could sit up there on those eggs until The Rapture and nothing is going to happen except that she's going to starve to death or die of dehydration.
Sigh...

All right. Just got a text from Mr. Moon. An Airstream trailer should be appearing in my yard within the next hour. Oh boy. Maybe we can fix it up and rent it out by the night. We could list it on Travelocity.


The Downtown Lloyd Inn. 
Minutes away from the interstate and not much else. Private, small accommodation for one person or a close couple. Peaceful country surroundings except for the train which passes by frequently approximately ten yards from your bed and the lovely, bucolic sound of roosters crowing from well before dawn until sunset. No wireless, iffy electricity and funky plumbing. Kitchen-equipped. Bring your own damn food because ain't no one going to cook for your damn ass and the only place to eat nearby is a Subway at the Truck Stop. WE DO NOT RENT TO RELIGIOUS FUNDAMENTALISTS OR ASSHOLES. And we do not share our liquor.
For information, room rates and to make reservations call:
(850) 997-XXXX.
We may or may not answer, depending on our moods.


Yep. Sounds like a new project.

Have a decent Sunday, y'all. 

Love...Ms. Moon



14 comments:

  1. I would stay in your trailer in were it not for the heat and insects, and my inferior sideboobage.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I will rent that trailer and live in it as I am soon to be destitute. I know that's slightly negative thinking which I'm trying to sidestep away from but the gleamy roundness of Airstream trailers appeals to the gearhead in me. Ever since my warn notice at MGJ I have been eating badly i.e. mostly ice cream and pasta and I think I am developing a pretty awesome i.e. STATE FAIR BLUE WINNER AWESOME case of sideboob or perhaps I need new underwear. Nevertheless.
    Yours,
    Rebecca

    ps. WV 5th tenbroa
    that almost reads ten bras if you squint.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jo- I am pretty sure that so far there is no definitive definition of what makes for superior sideboobage. So that part's okay. No worries. Plus, I would never discriminate on the grounds of such piffle.

    Madame King- Please post pictures of the sideboob. Because, you know I don't love you enough already.
    You would hate Lloyd. We do have storms but not nearly enough and it's so hot. Well, you know about this having lived in NOLA as well as Key West. Didn't you? We do not, however, get a coastal breeze. Other than all of that, you would love it here. Plenty of Animal Gods. That I can assure you of but no salmon. Airstreams are awesome. There's no doubting that.

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  4. That damn Asshole!

    And Miss Baby - I am now concerned. Keep us posted.

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  5. Fucking Asshole. Seriously hate that you have to have him invade your dreams like that, after all these years.

    I am as low as it goes today, too. Fucking Sunday.

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  6. I would stay there except for the no wireless part. I get kind of panicky when I am in places without WiFi.

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  7. That's a great ad. It should bring in just the right person. I have always had trains near except for just a few years of my life. Not 10 yards near but from a few blocks to a mile, always close enough to hear it. Trains don't bother me. It's the noise from the traffic on the first business route into town about a half mile down the road. It rained here today so that excused me from any chores outside.

    ReplyDelete
  8. completely off topic, but maybeuseful as a Diversion:
    http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2013/jun/01/natural-birth-childbirth-midwife-ecstasy

    from Britain via Switzerland to Lloyd
    Regine

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  9. I'm obsessed with Airstreams and would very much like to rent yours in Lloyd. Seriously.

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  10. It sounds like a great little guest house. Hope that Miss Baby figures out about her eggs not hatching. No sense waiting for the rapture. Although some times I think the world might end in our lifetime. But not because of the rapture--just because we humans mess everything up.

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  11. Jill- Yeah, well. What are you going to do? I'm worried about Baby too but she'll probably survive. We may take her eggs and force her off the nest. I need to research this a little.

    SJ- Sundays are the Doom Days, aren't they?

    Mr. Downtown- Uh-huh. Big and shiny.

    Gradydoctor- I am the same way.

    Angella- Truth in advertising.

    Ellen Abbott- We never did get the rain. Dammit.

    Regine- Hello! Great article! Thanks so much.

    Elizabeth- Probably not this one.

    Syd- I fear you may be right. And "rapture" is hardly going to be the word.

    ReplyDelete
  12. LOL! I would be HAPPY to rent your trailer for a Lloyd getaway.

    Maybe Miss Baby has been up to some after-hours chicken fun that you're just not aware of?

    As for your grumpy spell, I can certainly identify! We were on the same wavelength, apparently.

    ReplyDelete

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