Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Lots Of Nature Report


As you can see, it is quite green here and I love that but under the heading of too-much-nature I have to admit that I do not like finding a two-inch long beetle (not counting the antenna which added another inch in length to the entire bug package) in my kitchen sink drainer. I would have taken a picture but I wanted to get that fucker outside post haste in order to start the process of forgetting I'd ever seen it.
Last night there was a bug flying around the bedroom and I sort of just ignored it until it hit the ground and it's body sounded like maybe it was as big and hefty as a water buffalo and I went and got my glasses and tried to find it but I couldn't. Maybe that's what was in the kitchen sink.

This little guy kept me company as I was writing last night.


And he really was little. Smaller than that beetle, I'll tell you that. Isn't he darling? 
Still, though, I did not want to touch him nor will I ever willingly touch a frog. This is just an irrational thing but I admit to it. I don't even touch the pretty little lizards although, as with the frogs, I have no fear of them at all. 

I just talked to Owen. He and I miss each other desperately. There is a plan for us to go to lunch, hopefully with Hank and Elicia and May and Matt but despite modern technology and all of its gifts, we can't seem to coordinate this shit. We need a damn event planner around here, just to arrange a lunch for all of us. Owen's pretty excited about the prospect of going to lunch with all his beloveds so we better figure it out. Yesterday he and his brother and his mama went to lunch with Boppy and gave him a Father's Day card and from what I hear, they had a swell time. Boppy reported that Gibson ate approximately twenty-seven of his green beans. "Mo-ah?" Gibson says, meaning, of course, "more" and it's just the most charming thing you've ever seen.
Like a jealous lover, I asked Mr. Moon if Owen had asked about his MerMer.
"No," said my mean husband. "Today was all about Boppy."

Harumph.

Anyway, I need to get dressed and on my way. Lily and the boys and I might go do a little resort-wear shopping at the Third World Slave Supported Old Navy store. I AM going to a resort this coming up weekend. For me, of course, resort-wear would be a new pair of men's cargo shorts. I already have plenty of flip-flops and one bathing suit which will DO if you know what I mean, and if you don't, that means it fits on my body and until the elastic completely goes, that is the suit I will be wearing because I would rather cut off my nose than go shop for a new one. 

Someone asked me yesterday if I'd lost weight and I laughed. Please. This is always an awkward question, especially if you HAVEN'T lost weight, implying as it does that you NEED to lose weight, although the woman who asked me is about the sweetest lady ever and I don't think she meant anything by it (except that I do need to lose weight). 

So that's the story from Lloyd, Florida this morning. It's green and a veritable Apocalypse Now of crazy wild nature and my ant bites have risen up into red pus pockets and sure, you needed to know THAT. 

I watched about ten minutes of Magic Mike on the TV last night and it reminded me of how much fun it was to go see that movie with girlfriends, sitting in the front row of a movie theater on a Sunday afternoon, whooping and hollering as the men took off their clothes and I wish I could find a decent clip to embed here to get your blood moving this Tuesday morning but I don't have time to do all the research necessary plus, I would get way too distracted and I need to go be a grandmother and grandmothers aren't supposed to be having thoughts like the ones that clips from Magic Mike engender. Again- no logic, no rationality. Still. There you have it.

Love...Ms. Moon


9 comments:

  1. Our animal population is large around here too. About the only critters that I loathe are roaches. Cannot stand them!
    The little frogs are cool.

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  2. I have a lot of critters in my back yard, and there's Harvey, the groundhog that lives in the gully and comes out every spring and eats the peaches off my tree... the little stinker.

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  3. i can be your social coordinator and get you all organized and shit!

    xxalainaxx

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  4. I swear to god, Boppy and MerMer. It's so fucking cute! :)

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  5. Syd- Roaches are obnoxious as hell.

    Nancy- That is a bad, bad groundhog. Eating your peaches!?

    Mrs. A- Could you?

    Jo- We're pretty cute all right.

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  6. If I saw that bug in my sink, I would be dead. I swear to you. Sweet Jo

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  7. You know? I really can't stand Matthew McConaughey and that's the main reason why I haven't watched Magic Mike, but maybe I will now. Maybe I will.

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  8. Better a big beetle than a big roach. I'm not sure why that's true but it is. Love the frog.

    Magic Mike was a silly movie, but I admit I spent money to go see it in a theater!

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  9. Sweet Jo- Aw, no you wouldn't. I swear.

    Elizabeth- If you don't like Matthew, there's really no reason to watch it. Did you hear the interview he did with Terry Gross? He's hysterical.

    Steve Reed- It was worth the ticket price!

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