Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Big Wheel Keep On Turning. Proud Mary Keep On Burning.

Good Lord.
What a day.
I thought it was going to be my "off" day. No rehearsal and Owen wasn't coming out.
Things change. Jason had a deer to clean and then wanted to make sausage and he needed Mer to watch the boy while he did that. It was a vague plan. I moped around this morning and then took a walk and when I got back, I found Jason and Owen in the dining room, playing Scrabble.

They'd already had a game of chess.

Owen refused to stay in the house and help me make spaghetti sauce and instead, demanded to go out and help his daddy cut up the deer. And so he did. I busted ass in the kitchen, making the sauce and the dough for two loaves of bread. Owen came in to help me with that one- he likes to pat the dough and poke it and lick his finger and pronounce it good.

At this point, it was nap time. He did NOT want to take a nap but needed one desperately. He wanted his daddy to lay down, too. His daddy washed his hands and laid down on the bed with us and Big Bear and Zeke and listened to a few books and then Owen kissed him and hugged him so that he could get back to his work and then he and I settled down for the Mr. Peep story and he was out.
I slept too. Hell yes.

We got up and smashed down the bread dough which had risen lovely and then the games began and there was playing and greens-gathering from the garden and goat-feeding and Jason was grinding deer meat in the kitchen.

You know, back when I was a young woman, having a man grinding deer meat in my kitchen was just not something I ever thought would happen.
And yet.

Bop came home and I finished up the supper-fixin's and everyone had bread from the oven with butter and here's a picture of Owen after I said, "Show me how you eat bread."

He's an expert.

Bop ate his dinner and Owen had a few noodles of his own.

And juice. He loves to drink juice out of that tiny coke glass. I think he can drink about forty of those. Or at least thirty-nine.

Tom came over to meet up with Mr. Moon as they were going to a basketball game in town. He had a slice of bread too. Who can refuse bread from the oven? No one I've ever met.
Gluten is our friend.

Owen entertained us with massive burps.He would burp and then laugh like a hyena and then say, "Excuse me." Tom said, "Could he be a little more cheerful?"

There was a lot more. Animal pictures on Youtube. Owen is obsessed with Spirit, who is some damn cartoon movie horse. I have seen enough of Spirit to last a lifetime. But...we watched some more. Spirit being born. Spirit in the snow. Spirit being captured by white men. Spirit running through the prairie with an eagle. Spirit jumping off a fucking cliff. Spirit nuzzling his wife, another horse whom I believe is named Rain.

Here's my idea to make a million bucks: Make movies about the deaths of all of those horrible creatures which children love. Barny Bites It. Spirit Becomes A Spirit. Elmo's Eternal Rest. Etc. Put them up on Youtube so that parents and grandparents can show them to their tiny darling ones and say, "See? Spirit is dead. No more Spirit. Let's watch reruns of The Honeymooners!" And if they insisted that they needed to watch animal videos, we could just show them The Crazy Nasty-Ass Honey Badger, over and over again.

Not only would we not have to watch these abysmal films anymore, the wee tot would learn about death. An important lesson we should all learn before the age of three.

Okay. Just a thought. From a tired old grandmother.

Time to go clean up and tidy up. And eat some spaghetti. And the rest of that apple which Owen started and did not finish. Those apples are $2.49 a pound! I ain't wasting that apple.

No. I never thought I'd marry a hunter and I never thought I'd have a hunter-butcher-sausage maker in the family and I never realized how much I could love a grandchild.

You just never know. That's all I'm saying.

Which is probably a good thing.

Thank god I have rehearsal tomorrow. It'll be restful. Like a walk through fields of lavender.

Night, y'all.
Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I will help you produce those movies.

    And also, I'll hit Barney in the head with a blunt object, and I'll even run Elmo over with my car.

    I'm not usually prone to such violence, really I'm not. But how 'bout we lock Elmo, Barney, The WonderPets, Pokemon and Spirit in a cage with the honey badger. (Also, you should know that a few miles from our house, deep in the country, some fabulous stranger I'm in love with has marked his driveway to his singlewide with a homemade sign reading "honeybadger lane" and I LOVE HIM SO VERY MUCH).

  2. That was a Good Grandmaw Day. Like you said, "You just never know."

    Glad rehearsal has taken a turn for the better, too, not that I had any doubt that you would be able to get the lines down in the end. Now for the fun, acting, part.

    x0 N2

  3. OMG. I am laughing out loud here are Elmo's Eternal Rest.

    How about,

    Dora Drowns (As a Result of a Brick in her Backpack)

    Pokemon Perishes

    Blue Bites the Big One

    Caillou Checks Out

    Mr. Rogers is a Rotting Cadaver (Updated annually)

    Bob the Builder's Gets Crushed by a Tractor

    Sponge Bob Suffocates

    OK, I am having way too much fun with this but I think you are on to something. I bet FC Rabbath could help you.

  4. Sara- Yeah. Honey Badger don't care. He could take care of all those critters. Uh-huh. Honey Badger rocks my world. I love your neighbor.

    N2- I am getting there. We all are. Thank god.

    Birdie- I am with you except for Mr. Rogers. I love him with a passion as hot as the burning surface of the sun. Seriously, I think he was a saint in the real meaning of the word. I think that FC Rabbath needs to think about this, too. He could do the world a favor.

    DTG- You KNOW what I am talking about. I love you, baby.

  5. Oh my what a sick twisted group we are! Sitting around planning the death of those characters...I love it!!

    I remember that I had a certain plate at one Gma's and it was the only one I would eat from. At the other Gma's I had my favorite cup; one of those aluminum ones, green of course. Who knows why we focus on these things.

    Sweet dreams Ms. Moon.

  6. Oh, my god. Spirit was one of Henry's favorite movies. We recently rented it for old time's sake, and even though he's thirteen he cried a little bit. Dead serious. How about the hideous voice-over on that? WHAT was Matt Damon thinking?

    And I love Birdie's comment. I would add: Caillou Cracks Up

  7. Loved this post! You are such a good writer. Thanks for entertaining me this morning. I needed it. It is my birthday and everyone is being mean to me.

  8. You are funny--Elmo's Eternal Rest--LOL.

  9. I'm all for the death of obnoxious animals - cartoon/costume animals that is.

  10. Mel's Way- Maybe it is important to children to have special things at the grandparent's so that we always know that we are always welcome there and have a place.
    A sort of totemic magic?

    Elizabeth- I've never seen the movie. Thank god. Only the clips on Youtube which are musically accompanied scenes from the movie.

    no one you know- Well, happy birthday!

    Syd- I wouldn't kill off Sid The Science Kid. I like the way he dances.

    Magnum- Right. Uh-huh. Sure.

    Jeannie- I can think of a few obnoxious real animals I wouldn't mind seeing step over the rainbow either to be quite honest.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.