Saturday, July 24, 2010

Here We Are

Oh, darlin's, what a weekend it's been. And it's only Saturday night.
I am three days and one hour away from turning fifty-six and you know what? I did things today I have never done in my life. I have felt things I've never felt in my life.
And it has been good.
I got home from the Opera House last night (and I did not spill one thing on any person whatsoever at all) around nine-thirty and Lon and Lis got in a few moments later. And at that point, we all decided that it would be a good idea to crank up the martini shaker. See picture above.
And so we did. And it was fine, thus sayeth the Lord.
We had a great time and I was in bed by midnight but woke up around four a.m. and realized that no, it had not been such a great idea, especially maybe the second martini. I didn't get back to sleep until around six and got up around eight only to realize that I had to GET IN THE CAR AND DRIVE LON TO A MIXING GIG HE HAD TO DO IN TALLAHASSEE, which I did, and then Lis and I got a bagel and some coffee and headed over to FC Rabbath's house for some rehearsal. Mr. Rabbath is having printer problems and there were only three scripts for about seven of us, and none of us knew what we were doing but it was so much fun, rehearsing for a movie that none of us had any idea whatsoever was going on in (and I know now that Freddy is reading this blog and so HEY! FREDDIE! IT WAS AWESOME!) and as I said, Natasha came out and took me over and that met with approval.
After a few hours of rehearsal, Lis and I came home and ate some stuffed peppers and I scrambled around in my closet trying to find something for Natasha to wear. It was ridiculous but I did end up wearing the original Natasha high heels and that was good.
Back in the car and down the road to Marcy's house where filming was going on and somehow, it all happened and I did what I was supposed to do. And Freddie was actually filming two short movies at once and he asked me to step in and play another part for the other movie, which I did, and by the time I got home, I was somewhat soaring.
You know what? It's not that I think I'm the world's greatest actress because I know I am not. And I am fifty-five years old (for three more days and thirty-seven minutes) and I don't have one fucking thing to lose. I am not trying to make it as an actress. I am not an actress. Actor. Whatever. And I was surrounded by people with HUGE talent who have lots of experience and training and I know that and I'm not even trying to compete, I'm just having fun.
"Do this, be that, step here, wait two beats, there you go. Action."
God, it was fun.
My Natasha character got killed. I was going to be dead in a scene and the murderers were going to drag me across the yard but it started raining so that scene got canceled.
I was so disappointed. Oh well.

I found out that Freddie (HEY! FREDDIE!) is only twenty-three years old and that his shorts have won awards and that he was a translator in the Marines and I looked at him and I said, "Oh, you are such a baby and look at all you've done!" I hope he didn't take it the wrong way. I am seriously impressed.

And then he was finished with me and I came home and got ready to go to the Mockingbird and Mr. Moon and I drove to town and it was such a lovely night. Billy and Shayla and Waylon were there and Ms. Petit Fleur and her husband their son, Harley, who could not stop dancing. And we ate delicious foods and had another martini and I got to visit with May and the music was wonderful and on the way home, the almost-full moon followed us all the way. When we got back to the house I went out and closed up the chickens and took this picture of our traveling companion:

And now I might take my second shower of the day and go to bed. I have a rehearsal tomorrow afternoon and Lon and Lis are staying tomorrow night too and I think the kids are going to come out and maybe we'll eat cake. For Kathleen. Whom I hope will be here too.

And I just feel so good. I did something today which should have been, could have been very stressful but instead just felt as comfortable as lying down on a couch covered with down pillows.

Look. My face and body are falling apart and I ache everywhere and I'm at least ten pounds heavier than I wish I were but you know what? I don't care. Today I felt like my age was working for me.
Tomorrow I may feel differently about it all but tonight, that's how I feel under this almost-full moon.

And I'm so glad I could write about it. Could put it down so that I'll remember. Three days and twenty-one minutes before I turn fifty-six, I am as happy as I can be with where I am which is in a tiny village in North Florida in a house I love where I live with a man I love and people I love are visiting here and I got to hear them make music tonight and tomorrow I'll see more friends and my grandson.
And eat cake.

Yeah. It's good.

I am wearing my great-grandmother's tiny pearls around my neck, my old, wrinkled neck, and they are laying on my old sun-spotted chest and I am as content as I can be with this life, this time of this life, and all that it is in it and the people I am sharing it with.
And I have to say that Kathleen and her cancer has already taught me some things about enjoying it all and being comfortable in who I am. How strange to say that a dear friend's cancer has made my soul float freer but it has.
I would trade her good health for my not learning this lesson in a heartbeat but I can't do that. And I am not one to find meaning in everything that happens. I am just reporting what I am learning.

Three days and six minutes. I'll be fifty-six years old.
I feel like an old dog learning new tricks.
Roll over. Play dead. Oh wait. It's raining. Get up. Don't play dead. We'll shoot something else.

It's all fine with me. Here we are and ain't that something?
Ain't that something?
Yes. I think it is.


  1. You sound so high on life and you are lovely. I am so happy it is a good full moon weekend for you and your friends.

  2. your neck looks fantastic. seriously. your skin looks better than some 30 somethings here in Cali.

  3. i love you sweet miss moon. you know i do. so much.

    daddy b

  4. you and your great-grandmom's tiny pearls and the almost-full moon and lis and that martini shaker all look beautiful.
    you are going to rock fifty-six like nobody's business. i just know it.
    sweet dreams, moon mama.

  5. I am just praying I have some of your beauty at 56. That is all.

    But, Freddy, so fabulous even his shorts have won awards? Woo! :)

  6. Sounds like what we used to appreciatively call being turned on---a very good way to live!

  7. I'm tired just thinking about your weekend :)
    Sounds marvelous. Every bit of it. So glad you embraced the fun!

  8. This just made me smile the whole way through. And your neck is beautiful.

    Love ya bunches, Ms Moon


  9. Your neck and your tiny pearls are lovely. Your twinkly eyes take years off your age, you're just seeing it wrong!
    Your weekend sounded just about perfect, except for the second drink costing you your sleep. That's just not fair.
    I love that the moon followed you home after all that fun. Hope your weekend just keeps being amazing.

  10. I am turning 53 on Monday. I know the feeling all too well. But the summer birthday's are the best, don't you agree?

  11. I am so behind on the Geesh I am gone those 10 days and so much has happened at Ms. Moon's home...I must go back on read those previous blogs...

    Birthday girl...soon to be..age spots...yeah, okay, us sun lovers do get them...but your neck looks great to me...somewhere in the mid 40's the eyes play tricks on our vision...I avoid magnifiying mirrors. Shows too much...

  12. It was a precious evening indeed. You looked like a fairy princess. I don't know why a fairy princess, but that IS what came to my mind. Maybe you were sparkly and twinkly!

    I have to meet this 23 year old whose "shorts" have won awards! ;-P Sounds like some serious fun.

    Speaking of fun, Harley was out before his head hit the pillow.
    Good times.

  13. It's the moon mooning you. It makes us all feel a little high on life. Your neck looks good with the pearls.

  14. Woohoo, what a trainride! It's true, every day is a gift. And every birthday.

    And Ms. Moon, 56 isn't old, even in rural Florida. 90 is old, unless you can still dance, in which case it isn't.

  15. Ah, what a whirlwind.
    You are such a teacher.
    I love you just entering the world in this new way. It's invigorating and amazing and miraculous.

  16. It is something, indeed.

    Your necklace is lovely and so are you.

  17. Michele R- It was a pure wang-dang-doodle.

    Maggie May- Not in the light. But thank-you.

    Daddy B- I don't have a corvette. Heh-heh. I love you. I do.

    Notjustafemme- After this weekend, I hope I MAKE it to fifty-six.

    Lisa- As in "grand-mother is a crazy fool."

    Jo- I KNOW! His shorts are awesome. (Frankly, I don't know if he wears shorts or not.)

    A- You can say that again.

    Corinne- I did my very curmudgeonly best.

    Michelle- Love you bunches AND bunches.

    Mel- Oh it was.

    Sandra- I like summer birthdays. Might as well, huh?
    And happy birthday!

    Ellen- I got a magnifying mirror, looked in it and threw it under the counter in horror.
    It is now covered in dust.

    Ms. Fleur- He was a hoot, that Harley!

    Syd- I need to wear those precious pearls more often. They are very old and natural ones.

    Kathleen Scott- I love your definition!

    Bethany- I am being dragged kicking and screaming but it's pretty cool.

    Ms. Bastard-Beloved- Thanks, darling girl.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.