Sunday, May 29, 2016

Home, Musing

Well, as you can see we are home in Lloyd now and it was a very nice weekend away and as always, I am happy to be here although after being in the extremely tidy and uncluttered old house where we stayed, I am in despair at the disarray and clutter and dirt in my own house.
So of course I worked outside where the dirt and poop is supposed to be and in fact I dealt with dirt and poop to the betterment of my garden and also to the chickens and goats next door who received a nice bunch of wormy kale which I have finally and at last, pulled entirely.
I spread out composted chicken shit and pulled a few weeds and picked some green beans and fertilized the tomatoes and peppers and squash and as I did all of these things, I thought about the couple we met this morning on the front porch of the guest house where we were all staying.
It's always so odd to me- this artificial throwing-together of people in places where they are all taking accommodation and which is why I avoid B&B's. I am not worth talking to before I've had my coffee and trying to make small talk with strangers in such situations is not relaxing to me in the least but this was a little different in that we were all on the porch and they had their coffee pot from up in their room and we had our coffee pot from the kitchen and we were outside, as it were, and not trapped in some overdone dining room with the smell of scrambled eggs and muffins assaulting us before I was ready.
I do like to meet new people. I truly do. It's interesting. For someone who is as agoraphobic as I am, it's a little strange that nothing makes me more curious than contemplating the lives of others. And I had done so with this couple.
We had met briefly when I let them in when they arrived on Saturday and had crossed paths but that was all. This morning we actually spoke though. He is obviously older than she is and it turns out that she's from Canada and he is from the U.S.,  somewhere in the south and they live in Atlanta now. When we first began talking, I decided that he was a bit of a blow-hard and that she was far more intelligent than I had assumed. And far more intelligent than he, for that matter, but she seemed to be somewhat reserved, a little nervous, but friendly all the same.
We discussed this and that- mostly his work and Apalachicola and the little calico cat who lives on the porch and then we drifted into politics and he was the one who brought up Trump and we all agreed that he's a scary son-of-a-bitch but the man we were talking to has accepted that he might be an alright president because he'll just hire people who are really good at things to actually run the country. 
I said something like, "I doubt it. He's not even a good business man. How many times has he gone bankrupt?"
And the woman said, "Ten that I know of."
"Well, anything's better than that president we have now," said the guy and I felt Mr. Moon tense up because he KNOWS I not only adore our president with all of my heart but that I am also not loathe to speak my mind.
I took a deep breath and decided not to get into the bloodshed portion of such a beautiful morning so quickly and then the other woman said, "I love Bernie!" and I said, "Oh! I do too!" and we were off on that tangent and I did say, "I am extremely liberal," and I said it in such a way that I assumed Mr. Talk-Talk knew exactly what I meant and after that we mostly just discussed where to get breakfast and then we all wished each other well and went off on our separate ways.

So I've been thinking about this all day long, not in any sort of very negative way, but just wondering how in the world a woman like that can be with a man like that.
She told me that she grew up on the coast and loved pulling in mussels and clams and fish and that she loves the water so much, the ocean, the sea. Her eyes lit up as she told me about it and I saw the little child in her, living in a tiny town in Nova Scotia and I told her about how I grew up in a tiny fishing village too and I felt a sort of bond with her.
I hope she is okay. I hope that the man she's with treats her well and with respect. One never knows. He mentioned children from a former marriage and they mentioned a dog they have and it is easy to imagine their life together- she a sort of trophy girlfriend, he the Talk-Talk Man who seemed to be proud of the fact that he collects speeding tickets the way way some people collect art. She's so far away from home. I wonder what she sees in him? She was a pretty woman, but so very thin, and had a nervous habit of pulling at her very blonde hair and has had those lip injections that made her look as if it must be difficult to eat, and thus I assume that she may have issues with self-esteem.
Who knows? Not me. I am not a psychologist but human behavior does interest me to no end and I am endlessly curious about the subject.
As Yoko Ono said, "Everyone has a story to tell."
And it's true. And almost all of them are fascinating.

So here I am home in my life and going about the things I go about here- chickens and garden and yard and catching up with children but I tell you something- I am going to be thinking about that woman for quite some time.

Last night before we went to sleep, as the itching in my feet finally calmed, I went down the hallway to pee and found her, squatting on her heels before the bookshelf where there were books and movies for guests to borrow. I was in my old-lady white cotton nightgown and she was in one of her tiny clingy dresses and we exchanged a few words about how much we loved this old house, how comfortable it was, and wished each other a good-night.
That image is going to stay with me. Her vulnerability somehow in the hallway as she crouched like a child. I felt, for once, no desire to be her age again, to be young again, but grateful with my sturdy older self, my graying hair flying loose, my good husband waiting for me in the bed after he'd gone out to buy me Benadryl and cookies. Simply glad to be who I was, where I was, both in space and in time.

And I still do. And I wish her well.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I too always wonder how a, seemingly disparate, couple wound up together. I can imagine so many reasons, but who knows - it's so hard to tell...although I'm dying to know!
    I just know that I would never be able to live with something like that. I need a cloned Mr. Moon and they just don't make those.

    What a lovely place to stay. And I agree, it is so much better to eat out on the porch in the fresh air! I ponder sometimes the whole oddness of a restaurant - a room full of strangers eating together. Munching their food next to strangers - everyone glancing at each other - strangers!
    It seems so odd to me sometimes. I think too much.

  2. and so this is a ghost that lives in the house? I don't think I've heard your speak of her before.

    so yah, I would be thinking about her and worrying about her myself.

  3. I, too, try to imagine the lives of those we meet during our travels. It's kind of fun sometimes. I'm about to 'unplug' from politics altogether....yesterday a long-time friend posted some horrible things about Obama and his family because he apologized for Hiroshima. I asked her to point out the excerpt in his speech where he apologized for anything, because I couldn't find it. She said....'well, maybe he didn't come out and say it, but it was in his tone.' I went apeshit on her! So, yeah, I need to unplug before I become unglued! Oh, and Welcome Home!!!

  4. It's sometimes really hard to imagine how some people wind up together. I guess we can never see inside anyone else's relationship, right? I consider the plastic surgery a very bad sign, but then, that's my own values talking, I suppose.

  5. Generally I agree with Steve about the plastic surgery, but I've toyed wit the idea of trying a lip injection just for fun. I have very thin lips which is not the aesthetic ideal where I live, and I think it would be interesting just to see them plumped up for a bit. Like getting a new hairstyle or a pedicure.

    Anyway, I immediately thought when you started writing about them that they are in a sort of BDSM relationship and he is dominant. It may not be by-the-book BDSM, but she may well be comfortable with a relationship where he sets the rules.

    How could anybody think that about Obama? I was just musing abou the horrible stock market crash - look at all he has done to improve our economy, our lives. People are idiots for not adoring him as you and I do.

  6. well, OK, I read your last paragraph again and realized you were talking about the house you stayed in and the wife of the other couple. I can be so dumb sometimes.

  7. when we went to the cabin in the UP, we ended up hanging out at the bonfire with the other couple who was staying there who we never would of spoken to otherwise, but they were nice- from the west side of the state but both grew up by where we live.

    you can be friends with someone for a lifetime or just a day, or even just an hour.


  8. If she's from Nova Scotia, she's a hardy girl, deep down.
    Does it shock you that people you barely know blurt out their strong and hateful opinions? It's happened to me a lot lately where people I've just met share their opinions without solicitation and I've been frigging gobsmacked! WTF is wrong with people?!

  9. Liv- I do too. Think too much. But it's okay. This is who we are.

    Ellen Abbott- You are not dumb. I am too wordy. And I told someone on FB last night that she was an angle.

    Catrina- And so what if he DID apologize? It's about fucking time someone did. Jesus. Yeah. Unplug.

    Steve Reed- Yeah. I agree. We never really know what the inside of a relationship looks like and honestly- sometimes I am not quite certain why my OWN relationship with my husband has lasted the way it has. There are still many mysteries.

    NOLA- Well, this woman was a conundrum because she was obviously not afraid to speak out. But her presence, posture- these seemed so submissive. I am glad that her words were NOT. And I noticed that she often drove. So perhaps I am reading far more into this thing than should be read.
    And yeah- the man she was with discussed the economic crash quite a bit and the recovery. He seemed to not think that Obama had anything to do with that. He did, however say, "Not sure I'd like to see another Bush in the White House."
    As to the lip injections- I've had allergic reactions which made my lips swell and it was horrible. I can remember that feeling and it was not good.

    Mrs. A- That is completely true! I agree!

    Heartinhand- Yes! When she spoke of her childhood, I could see that hardy, happy girl in her.
    I WAS shocked when the man just came out with his anti-Obama rant. How DARE he?

  10. I have a pregnant client who has botoxed lips and it's all I can do not to stare at her mouth when she talks. her mouth looks like two pieces of rubber flapping together. So weird!!

    A friend told me she had her 'waddle' removed from underneath her chin and now her ears and face are numb. They also took fat and put it in her face so if she loses weight, she won't look strange.

    I promise I will not react the next time I see her and her new immobile face.

    We've come to this, apparently.

    XXXX Beth

  11. Dear America, it's 'wattle' not 'waddle'. One's a saggy neck like poultry has, the other's a funny walk.

    And while I'm being an inexcusable spelling correcter, it's not 'shutter', it's 'shudder'.

    Knives in the eyes, folks, knives in the eyes.

    Ok, I'll run screaming into the darkness now, and you can throw things at me as I go.


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.