We're leaving for Cozumel in one week, say it again: ONE WEEK and no, I am not ready. I was thinking last night about how it always goes when we get to Cozumel which is that you get off the plane (you, if you are you, are already crying) and stand in line to get your passport stamped and then wait in line to push the button to see if you get your luggage checked (green light, go, red light, search) and then wait in line to get the pass for the van to take you to your hotel and then get on the van and I am quivering, quivering, already beyond endurance of ecstasy- there it is- the water- and you look at all the changes and the same-same-as-it-ever-was as you drive to the hotel, or are driven, to be precise, and you get to the hotel and they unload all your luggage and you go to check in and then you see your room and no, it will not do because the bed is too small, they promised you a large bed and your husband is very, very tall, or the view is not good, is there a room with a better view? and finally, in hours, you are in perhaps the proper room (and this ALWAYS happens, always, no matter where you stay, and it is part of the experience) and you are, by then, a little bit overwhelmed and emotional and what-have-we-done?
There may even be tears.
But then maybe your husband gets to the grocery store and buys a bottle of rum, some coca-cola, some limes and back to the room where you have unpacked and then there is a drink on the balcony and Hola! Hello! You are back. The water, blue, green, teal, violet, starts to go orange, gold, silver with the sunset and the sun sets early there and you know where you are going for supper because it's where you always go the first night, not the best place, maybe but your place for the first night and you get dressed and you get a taxi or walk, depending on how far you are from town, and you enter the Zocalo and it smells like home, it looks like home, the people, the children, the lights, the trees, the clock tower, and is that man going to be there at Plaza Leza? The one who always smiles like a grandfather, who says to you, "Welcome home?"
Will he be there?
Oh. I hope so.
And then I will begin to melt, well and truly and maybe the musicians will come by and I will ask them to play the Cozumel song and then I will cry and I will hold my husband's hand and I will say, "Thank you, thank you, thank you for bringing me back," and we will drink a tiny lethal margarita and after dinner we may stroll around and end up renting a scooter which we should not do but we always do and joke with the scooter rental guys and I'll be in a dream and we'll put on our helmets and drive down the road through the soft air, the ocean to our right this time to our hotel and we will be back. We will be back. We will be back and home.