Monday, August 30, 2010

When You Need A Friend

Oh shit. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit.
What have I done?

For some reason (and good morning, y'all! happy Monday!) I decided to get back on Facebook.
What a fucking mistake.

I wasn't drunk, I wasn't stoned, I just caved to the damn Social Networking Frenzy which has overtaken this world of ours and I forgot why I got OFF of Facebook to begin with which is that every person in this world wants to be your "friend" on Facebook and really, I don't have time for that shit.

I don't have time, do you hear me?!

What have I done?

It seemed like every five minutes someone was asking me if I was on Facebook. And every time I very primly and yes, condescendingly said that no, I was not. I had been but I hated it and I got off. Done. Felt good about it, too.

And then Lily started talking about all the pictures of Owen on her site and her friends' sites and Jessie told me I could go see pictures of her new sweetie and Freddie was putting up pictures of the filming and I wanted to see them and our old friend, Daddy X said that he had tons of pictures up of his darling girl and of course I want to see THEM and all of that is good. All of that is valid.

But then come the friend requests. And okay, no problem. I like friends.
I like REAL friends. People that I may have known briefly in not-real-friend contexts thirty years ago are not actually friends, are they? Do I need to know what they had for dinner? No. Do they need to know what I had for dinner? No.
Do I love my blog with all my heart and the community we have here?


So why, why, WHY did I feel the need to unleash the beast known as Facebook upon myself? Not once but TWICE! I can't even figure that shit out. My wall? My wall? Who writes on a wall? Hell. I don't know. It's Monday morning and I'll feeling all out-of-sorts and I need to take a walk and go get my grandson and go to the library where I will get books on tape.
Yes. Actual cassette tapes.
I might as well go find some stone tablets with stories chiseled into them.
And my telephone isn't working. Oh, it works. You can call out on it but it doesn't ring when someone calls here. Which is sort of peaceful. BUT WHAT IF ONE OF MY KIDS NEEDS ME?

And since I've been writing this, I think I've confirmed four new friends.
Ah lah.
It's here for the good, it's here for the bad.
And I just went over to Jessie's sweetie's page and listened to a recording they did a few months ago with Ben Sollee and really- that's not bad. That, in fact, is rather awesome.

Well, I'm a hypocrite and I'm a stupid doody-head and I can't text on my phone and I don't Tweet and I listen to books on tape and it's cooler today and I want to go get in the garden and pull out weeds and plant cabbages and greens and onions and I want to go get my grandson and bring him here and play with him and take him out for a walk in Lloyd and I want to live a peaceful, well-intentioned life and be all mindful and shit and yet, I've joined Facebook (again!) and I can feel parts of my brain matter spread out and splatter on a wall.
The Wall.
We don't need no education.
We have Facebook.

I have submitted, I have surrendered. I have gone and given my soul to the devil and hey!

Wanna be my friend?


  1. My criteria for accepting a 'friend request' on FB is that I had to have actually met the person at least once in my life - even if it was back in high school.
    So, no, I never met you and won't
    'friend' you there. Sorry, my loss, I'm sure.

  2. There there...

    You know you can always use an alias and friend people as you like. When you friend them tell them that you are you, and nobody else will know and want to friend you! Not as much anyway.

  3. I already am your friend, and I don't need damn Facebook to cement the deal. I hate the Facebook. Shit sucks.


  4. You should always be wary of anything that begins with F….. Foliticians, Fecond Hand Car Falesmen, Facebook, and Farts….

    All the best, Boonie

  5. I don't do Facebook. It seems like a bigger waste of time than I already waste time on.

  6. Honestly, for me, FB not a big deal. It's something I check once a while to see if there are new pics of my friends, but I never try to keep up with anyone with it. It can be a total waste of time, but I probably only spend five minutes on there each day.
    You certainly don't have to get sucked into any crazy Fb world if you don't want to.

  7. Heavens! An awful lot of angst over this thing. I read that most people interact with only 4-6 others on FB, commenting, etc., no matter how many friends they have on it. I have enjoyed reconnecting with old old friends, seeing pictures of their families, etc. as well as using it for just a low-key way to give a nod to each other, like saying "hey" in the hall. And I don't accept every friend request. Mary, just hang a few photos there and forget about it. I'll even unfriend you if you'd like and not even have my feelings hurt. :)

  8. Lucy- You go, girl. I like that rule.

    Ms. Fleur- I tried. The alias I wanted to use was unacceptable to their software. Ms. Moon? Okay.

    Ms. Bastard-Beloved- And I love you too!!!!
    And you're right about FB.

    Boonie- Well. That gives me plenty to consider.

    Syd- Sigh. True.

    HoneyLuna- Yes. That is the attitude I want. Thank-you.

    Lopo- No! Don't unfriend me! I want to be your friend! I feel like we ARE friends, already. And you're right. I'm being way too dramatic about this. Phew. I need to breathe.

  9. You can make it as big or as small as you like. My family lives all over the country, so it helps.

  10. Aah, the FB angst =o]. They may need to add this to the dictionary, as they have "unfriend" I read the other day. Just don't get sucked outta here to there, Mary Moon. We need you here. x0 N2

  11. Um yes! And just for the record, I doubt you need to ask any of your readers if they want to be your friend! lol
    Sending out a request if I can find ya...
    Tiffany Bowman

  12. Aww! I love facebook. I leave it on all day and every once in awhile come back and see a little message from a friend. I think it's neat.

    I also have a very large extended family and friends that have moved all over the world so facebook (and my blog) is a nice way to share our lives with people who aren't close enough to enjoy my kids. etc..etc...

    I'll be your friend without facebook, but it's pretty neat on there too!

  13. I would so love to be your facebook friend. I'm obsessed with it - often checking it while in court even. I'm shameless. I love all the articles people post that make me think about things - I learn tons. And I like to make announcements there, that sort of thing. I keep up with people so much better there than in real life. I use it as a transition tool when I'm at work - finishing one case, check FB, work on another. Rarely do I just sit and stare at it. I just don't have time to read blogs, but I always have time for Facebook.

  14. I finally submitted to FB when my brother and his family moved away but I'm hardly ever there.
    I've reconnected with a few people...but then the idiot who propositioned me found me too. *sigh* As dear SB would say, it's a curse to be so damn popular.

  15. Oh, for you I may actually cave and make myself a blog page. But my personal one? Better not - I'm still in the closet about being a blogger. And still scared to come out. So never the twain shall meet. But for you? Oh now I may have to...


Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.