Thursday, August 12, 2010
Arthur, I Love You
Mr. Moon has no idea sometimes how close he comes to seeing me go up in flames. This morning was one of them.
He stayed out late last night, playing poker while I stayed at home, which is fine with me. I got a lot done and went to bed pretty early.
But this morning he came out to the porch to tell me that although he noticed I did remember to shut the chickens in, I had forgotten to turn off the porch ceiling fan.
"I know it's hard to remember," he said sweetly.
"Arthur," I thought to myself. "Oh, Arthur."
I read a book once, an autobiography by Gloria Stuart, called I Just Kept Hoping. Ms. Stuart is a remarkable woman who played the very old woman in Titanic. In the book she said that when she got really mad at her husband she would say, quite reasonably, "Fuck you, Arthur!"
And that amused me and so our code, Mr. Moon's and mine, for not being amused when one of us does or says something that pisses the other off is simply, "Arthur!"
Yes. I forgot to turn off the ceiling fan.
But. I weeded, I did some plant trimming, I did some laundry, I cooked an entire meal so that he could have a lunch and a dinner tonight while I'm at rehearsal and cleaned up the kitchen and oh, who knows what all else I did?
And thus, the "Arthur." Which I did not say out loud but sat and just looked at him and nodded and said, "Oh yeah. I'm sorry."
I sat and seethed a bit for a few moments, thinking of all the things I DO remember, such as to do his laundry and buy food and then remember to prepare it. I remember to buy toilet paper and sometimes even remember to put it on the holder when he, for some reason, forgets. And I remember to buy the dish washing soap and the laundry detergent and light bulbs and cat food and his supplements which I also remember to hand to him because he never remembers, and I remember to take the trash and do whatever housecleaning gets done around here and all the things I do but that no one ever even thinks of because...well, it's done.
ARTHUR!
And then I stop and I think about the fact that he works so hard to make the money for all of these things and he remembers to go to work every day and he remembers to go work out every day and he remembers to thank me for the meals I make and cleans up after sometimes and how he always remembers to buy chicken food and dog food and beer and how he takes such good care of Owen and even changes poopy diapers and how Owen is in such bliss when his grandfather kisses the back of his neck with his beardy face and then, and THEN, when I took the dogs to the groomer this morning and came back and found this note:
well, what could I do?
Sigh and say, "Arthur. I love you."
Marriage. It's a funny thing and there are bumps in the road and then there is such sweetness your heart melts all over again.
Good-morning, y'all.
Love...Ms. Moon
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
And these posts are the reason I refuse (today) to give up on the idea of love. Really.
ReplyDeleteArthur indeed!
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with Shirley Valentine on this one, "Marriage is like the middle east. There's no solution!"
It is sometimes hard to remember to see all the good.
ReplyDeleteI love you, too, Mary Moon.
Ms. Moon, Thank you. Now I have something funny and sweet to think the next time my husband makes me crazy with his commentary on the things I didn't do. I always feel like I have to prove myself or please everyone and I always, always fail. And I get so mad when I'm told I forgot to do something, like close the garage door, or lock the house. I feel so inadequate. But there are times, like yours, when he does something so sweet I could just cry. It's crazy and it makes no sense, but it works. That's how love is, and thank you for putting such wonderful words to it. And thanks also for the lead to what looks like a great read. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteI have been away from all of my favoritest people who live in my computer for awhile and this was the sweetest place to come back to. The place of Arthur...
ReplyDeleteI also just watched your film debut. You are glorious and what a treat to hear your voice.
Kori- There is absolutely no need to give up on love. None.
ReplyDeleteMs. Fleur- I'd forgotten that line! I need to watch that movie again. It's so wonderful.
Ms. Bastard-Beloved- It's pretty easy to see the good when it comes to Mr. Moon, I have to admit.
Mel- I actually read that book with my ears- listened to it on tape read by Ms. Stuart, which made it all the better.
And made "Fuck you, Arthur," that much more delicious.
Lisa- I'm so glad you're back! I love visiting you and your amazing son, Bob Rosenberg. I love him. Did you really watch the video? There should be a new one up soon.
I feel awful when I have been a pill to my Love...of course it is when he is gone to work and the tears start to flow that I realize I was being that way...I want him to drive home for me to give him a big ole' kiss and tell him I love him.
ReplyDeleteand Mr. Moon and his love note...so sweet.
Oh and your comment to Lisa...another video? Yippeee!
You've captured it perfectly. So, so perfectly. I have my awful Arthur moments as well, with my sweetheart.
ReplyDeleteYou've got a good man in him.
PS---I love that my mom is a hippie type. I don't think that there's anything dirty about them, or you. My poor attempt at humor.
And yes, women and women, and girls are girls.
Not mad?
Ellen- Even REALLY good men can be Arthurs now and then. Just as really good women can be too.
ReplyDeleteNancy C- Are you kidding me? Mad at you? Never. I'm just a little nuts on the subject of pubic hair. Each to her own! I have my issues and I admit it.
Good. I think you're aces.
ReplyDeleteNancy C- P.S. I swear, that curried eggplant was the best thing ever. It was so good on the third night that I wanted to weep because I was finishing it up. I will be making that again and SOON! I added portabellos (I had some) and used hot peppers from the garden. Lord, it was awesome.
ReplyDeleteI get my full Sunday name when I'm in trouble:
ReplyDeleteAlan Leslie Shaw...
My dear wife,before she sold her soul to insurance, was a Primary School teacher (what's that over there? kindergarden?) and she has this look that only teachers can give... ;)
Also we have by the wonders of technology an internet enabled TV with Youtube so I've just seen Ms. Moon on the big screen:
http://www.bigalsplace.co.uk/images/msmoon.JPG
How ace is that?
Fat Lad
The things that we say, and immediately wish that the words could be taken back. I have an idea that he knew as soon as he said the words, he regretted them. We are human and humans mess things up. It is the mark of a humble person who can admit when they are wrong. Good for both of you.
ReplyDeletehere is my love note for you....
ReplyDeletei love you mrs. moon. you grace my life with wicked laughter, deeper sighs, beauty and wild abandon.
i am off to a small lake with lots of time to dream and rest.
i will think of you when the loons sing.
xoxoxoxoxoxo,
rebecca
I love how you can see both sides! Look how wise you are! :)
ReplyDeleteMr. Lad! How good to see you and then...uh oh! To see ME in that picture. Odd. I look creepy, don't I?
ReplyDeleteYes. I know that teacher-look. Now THAT's scary. And the full name? You must be a bad Lad sometimes.
Syd- I think the "Arthur" thing keeps it light for us. We always laugh when the other says it and then we are fine.
rebecca- Oh. That makes me so happy. The note and the idea that you are going away for a good rest. I love the sound of loons. We don't have them here but I love them anyway. You are precious to your very bones.
NOLA- OLD, maybe. Not so wise. Wise ass. Yeah. Old wise-ass, that's me.
You ARE a wise-ass, I will not object. But you are also wise. Really. I think the real wisdom is in the doubting - but your ability to see multiple sides is also great.
ReplyDeleteYou two kill me. In the swooning kind of way.
ReplyDeleteThese are the kind of posts that leave me wanting more more MORE.
ReplyDeleteI love the rawness and madness and tenderness and love.
Love this and love you two! Off to writing camp tomorrow. It's been a crazy wonderful week.
ReplyDeletex0 N2
NOLA- If realizing I don't know shit is wisdom, I am one of the wisest people on earth.
ReplyDeleteElizabeth- We're pretty funny. Just look at us standing together and you'll realize that the universe has a wicked sense of humor.
notjustafemme- You shiver my timbers.
N2- WRITING CAMP??!!
I bet you won't even have to sing around a campfire. I want to come! Have great fun and WRITE, WRITE, WRITE!
Yes I watched it! Really, really watched it. Lovely and creepy and resonant. And you were the perfect mama.
ReplyDelete