When Trump got elected I thought I had a glimpse, a glimmer, an idea of how bad things could get.
And quite honestly, everything I feared might happen has happened with the exception of one thing and I won't discuss that because it's too frightening.
(Did you get your text message?)
The environment, gay rights, women's rights, the rights of immigrants- I feared for all these things.
Check, check, check.
I knew that the man was insane. I knew he was a crook and a liar. I thought he probably had dementia.
Check, check, check, check, check.
I knew he was not qualified to run a Chick Fil A, much less a country.
Check and double-check.
I knew he was a sexual predator and an adulterer.
And he has the canceled checks and tapes to prove it!
I knew he was a bigot and was going to be a huge embarrassment for our country.
And yes, I was right about those things too.
And I knew that he was going to nominate someone awful for the supreme court.
I suppose that what I didn't know was that the Republicans would be, well, I'd say morally bankrupt but at this point I'm just going to say evil and would support him in every horrible ridiculous, terrifying thing he did.
So WHERE is this adult in the room? This famous anonymous adult?
I keep expecting him, Trump, to take out his wanger at one of his rallies and start to wave it around and for his supporters to cheer him on in his wanger-waving, to have the Republicans in Congress still refuse to do anything to stop this man.
When the accusations against Kavanaugh first came out, so many people were optimistic that he would not get that seat on the bench of the highest court in the land for the rest of his life.
I had no optimism at all in that regard.
Lies don't matter any more. Not even under oath.
Horrible, child-like, anger-spitting behavior does not matter any more.
Women and their bodies and their souls do not matter any more. If they ever did.
Children don't matter. Of course. Especially not children of color.
The recommendations of experts do not matter any more.
The wishes of the people do not matter any more.
I wish to fuck I knew what it was that mattered.
Why in hell are these people so determined to get this particular squinch-faced prepboy on the Supreme Court? Is it really to overturn Roe v. Wade? Is it to protect the president from being prosecuted when his illegal dealings with Russia, among other things, finally come to light? Or does that even matter any more?
I don't know.
I don't know.
But I will bet you the damn ranch that he'll be voted in.
I have no optimism. There is no justice any more. There is not even a nod towards justice. She has been bound and gagged and molested and abused.
I am not even that optimistic that these coming up elections will change very much.
Wave that wanger, Trump. Wave it hard and wave it high. Turns out that what you thought of as "great" is exactly what a whole lot of people thought was great too.
Or didn't think.
At all.
Or did think and realize that "great" means great for rich white men. Which is GREAT!
And as you unzip those pants and reach in to try and find the tiny appendage I'll just be looking on and as usual thinking, "Is that legal?"
And somehow, it will be.
And with Kavanaugh on the bench, the next thing you can do will be to shit on the Constitution.
Literally.
Right after you've taken a piss in the Liberty Bell.
Wanger in one hand, flag in another.
I'll try to be more civilized tomorrow.
We'll see how that goes.
Vote, goddam it. Please. Vote.
Love...Ms. Moon
You've stated it very well. I have zero hope for anything good in the future. I am so depressed over all of this, that honestly if they cancel elections in 2020 I will not be surprised. There does not seem to be a bottom, he just keeps going lower.
ReplyDeleteI remember a friend of mine who was at the time addicted to crack telling me that people always talk about hitting bottom but what they didn't know is that there is no bottom.
DeleteAnd there you go. No bottom.
just...wow. Wow...........just that. I'll go crazy writing anything else
ReplyDeleteSusan M
It's all too much, isn't it?
DeleteWell said. My sentiments exactly. Amazed at the fucktitude of it all.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't even seem possible, does it?
Deletethank you, Mary for articulating everything in my head that I can not quite get a grip on, I just sputter...and eat, I am not optimistic at all. this man will be on the highest court and there goes everything down the toilet. If drugs did not make me so sick I would be out on the street right now scoring. and you bet, we can VOTE, have you seen how impossible they are making THAT???
ReplyDeleteI don't trust the electoral process any more. Why would these people even give a shit about vote tampering or whatever? I swear to god, I think that Trump knew damn well that Russia wanted him president and was doing everything in their power to fuck with our election. And yet, I will vote because what else can we do?
DeleteYou've articulated this well and sadly, you are right. My ballot was sent as a photo in my mail today. Was it actually delivered? Nope. I've notified the folks at the post office. If it does not appear by Monday, I'm requesting another one. It may not do much good, but it will be used and I hope counted.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to go early-vote. I don't trust the mail-in. Not that I trust the kind you submit at the voting place but it seems a little bit safer to me.
DeleteNo hope. But I appreciate this post. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteHow'd we get from "Hope" to hopeless? So quickly?
DeleteI like that, wanger. The English have a word, wanker which suits that sad, pathetic, excuse for a human.
ReplyDeleteIt's about money. And fear of death I think. They think money will protect them. Money can't do that. We will all die. To have so much and not share with those who need help is reprehensible.
Oh, yeah. I think that money is behind most of it. Money and ego and pride and vanity and yes, the fear of death. Always that.
DeleteAnd share? Why would the richest of the rich want to do that? Of course there are exceptions. But mostly, the filthy rich just want to hold on to what they have and make more of it and damn the rest of the world.
Yes, I know. Sigh. I’ve been furious but tonight, before the next vote on Kavanaugh, I just feel beaten down. I’ve already voted. I’ve sent many messages to our POS Senator Ron Johnson (every one unacknowledged and unanswered), I’ve spread the word about Resistbot as an easy way to send electronic messages to key legislators, I’ve read, I’ve watched, I’ve shared, I’ve talked, I’ve written, and I simply feel like I’m screaming into a void. So, I’m with you, except that I’m just so tired.
ReplyDeleteAnd you deserve to be tired because you have fought! Thank you for that and even if you are shouting into the void, you've not given up and I respect that. I feel as if that's what I'm doing too.
DeleteGet some rest, rise up and fight some more.
I am in awe of the people who continue to fight; it means they have hope. I am working with one such right now. She gets tired and then she gets back up. I am in awe of her bedrock commitment to not giving up. Her and the women in the senate building today, they are the ones who give me hope. But yes, I never imagined the whole damn party would fall in line. Not a leader among them. Cowards all.
ReplyDeleteCowards all, indeed. "Craven" as they used to say which somehow sums it up better.
DeleteYour post title really resonated with me tonight Mary and everything else you wrote perfectly summed up my feelings. We are fucked. Beyond fucked. I can barely stand it and feel like I'm going to explode or something.
ReplyDeleteI know. I know.
DeleteLet's hang in there, Jennifer. Let's try.
I am so tired of Trump ( I have stopped writing but my son has kept up) and Kavanaugh I am so tired of all the noise and talking heads.
ReplyDeleteYour Painting is not what we see here at the Border.
Please move downhere and live in a Border Town like I do. Not for a day but for many years.
The mom would be 15 or 16 or in her early 20's and pregnant. There is no boyfriend/husband with her. She will have a child or 2 with her and after getting here have an anchor baby. That equals section eight housing, aid to dependent children, healthcare, food stamps.
The majority of Hispanic children going to school do not speak any English at home ( not even the TV) even after starting school.
The Tucson School District, one of the largest, last year had to hold back half of all the third grade in the whole district. They could not speak enough English to pass on to the Fourth Grade. The High School dropout in this district is huge. They dropout at 15 because that is what the parents did.
They come for the free Breakfast/Lunch plus computers. No matter how many ESL classes they have they only speak Spanish with very little English.
Right now the cartels are coming over with more drugs and violence.
My Democrat party is backing Garcia who is running for Governor. He want no borders, no border police, sanctuary city/state and free health care and free tuition or resident tuition to University. I am at a loss.
My taxes need to go for the First Nation People, who we have marginalized, Police, Fire Department, Teachers, Veterans, Aid for Elderly, Women who are now the biggest group of citizens who are now homeless, Mental Health help and help for the Handicapped like me. We need to take care of the American Citizens first. People who are in need. I pay taxes and see no or very little help for them.
I think you will delete this comment which of course you can as this is your blog but I had to comment your painting. I hope you are not very upset I didn't want to add to the noise.
Hope Jeff Flake sends Kavanaugh along with Trump back to where he came from.
cheers, parsnip and badger
Why would I delete your comment? I don't expect everyone to agree with me. And I am sorry that your life is made so miserable by immigrants and I do respect your point of view which has been formed from experience.
DeleteBut. I'm sorry. Even if that painting does not reflect ALL of the immigrant experience, it shows the fear, the desperation that anyone who risks coming to this country must feel. How much more desperate and fearful must a sixteen-year old girl with a baby or two be than a couple with a child? And as I am sure you may know, applying for housing and food stamps and public assistance and health care is not a magically easy experience.
I agree with you that the First People have been tragically treated and marginalized but damn! We, a bunch of immigrants took this land from them and now we have the audacity to refuse to let others in? To a country built on the bones of the people we stole this land from, not to mention the bones of the slaves whom we tore from their original homes and brought here in chains to do our labor? Is there not irony in this?
I don't have answers and I'm sure that you have made many valid points and I'm sure that some people do absolutely scam the system but the amount of money we spend on these issues doesn't begin to compare with what we spend on the military.
And lastly- children in cages separated from their parents?
No. That I cannot and will not see as anything but what it is which is the most heinous cruelty imaginable. The Nazis did it and we called it unthinkable. We are doing it and we shrug our shoulders and ask, "Well, what can I do?"
Again, I don't know but right is right and wrong is wrong and this is absolutely wrong.
And I agree with you about Kavanaugh but of course Flake flaked.
Deletewell, my rant was focused more on Kavanaugh but you are so right. where are the fucking adults. I never thought, when Trump was elected, that the Republicans were completely morally bankrupt. Yes, I knew they liars and cheaters but to go as low as they have gone. I am speechless. what has happened to this once proud country. even if democrats do get a majority in one or both houses, something that I am not very hopeful of today, it will take decades to recover and even so, this country will never be the same. I hope to hell all these energized kids get out and vote. they may be our only saving grace.
ReplyDeleteI won't dispute Parsnip but Tucson, that whole area, used to belong to Mexico. people spoke spanish there long before they spoke english. just sayin'.
DeleteAin't much here I disagree with, Ellen. I think that you and I are both drained of hope. I wish we weren't, but I think we are.
DeleteAnd yeah, Americans not only stole the land we live on from Native Americans, they stole it from the Mexicans too. To the victor go the spoils!
Perfectly said sister- I guess I was wrong in thinking some shread of decency was lurking somewhere in the dark hearts of Republicans- the crazy thing is this all should be so easy, a little kid could figure out this stuff. This is what happens when money is allowed to literally highjack our democracy-that, and, as Bill Maar used to say, there’s an awful lot of stupid people in our country-
ReplyDeleteWell, you're right about that, White. This should be so easy to figure out. "Is this guy qualified to sit on the Supreme Court?"
Delete"Uh, no."
"Okay, move on."
But no.
Nope. Not going to happen.
Ram him on through.
I had no idea how many stupid people were in this country but I now certainly have a much more accurate idea.
Brilliantly written Mary! I have to take a small break from the news to gather the strength to push back. It’s all too much. I did write a thank you to Lisa Murkowski today and Heidi Heitkamp. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteXoxo
Barbara
Thanks for writing those letters. You done good.
DeleteTake the break you need. You won't do any good at all if you kill yourself in this fight.
This is plenty civilized, even more so when compared to what we see on the national stage. No, I had no optimism and have even less now. Did we ever imagine disgrace of this magnitude? Keep writing, Mary Moon, whatever needs to be said, please.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Marylinn.
DeleteI did imagine such disgrace but of course there was a secret part of me that hoped that Trump would somehow man-up and not be the complete idiot and evil asshat that he obviously is and that if that didn't happen, then someone, SOMEONE would step in and take over. Legally.
That's not happening.
But I'll keep writing.
As a sexual assault survivor I have been watching this circus unfold dispassionately, insulating myself as best as I could. I've read your blogs and your comments Mary, agreeing with them all, but trying to keep my distance. And then.
ReplyDeleteI saw POTUS mocking a sexual assault victim at a rally, on a stage in front of the world. He's a always been a misogynist so I figured that was business as usual for him. Then I saw the crowd of people at his back screaming support for him and Kav, laughing at his humiliation of her, supporting his jeering at her, and I just lost it. I haven't stopped crying since. Watching 50% of Americans treat a sexual assault survivor like this has been more traumatizing than my original assault (which I reported to the police, but alas, no one believed me).
I don't know Mary, how you have been able to write and blog and comment, and continue the conversation. I applaud you for it. I have been able to do nothing but lock myself up tight, and then fall apart when I realized that indeed, nothing has changed for women since my assault decades ago. And I can't figure out how to stop being so sad, but your blogs about your family and your chickens helps.
Voting is all we can do.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your passion. I knew you would have wise words. I hope people will also register voters, join a phone bank, volunteer to get people to the polls, etc. All are also important. Organize, organize. We all can do so much.
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletegood post!!!
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