Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Lis Is The Boss Of Me

I got an e-mail from Lis this morning instructing me to please call her as soon as I was awake and conscious. So I did, of course. Now, there's been a plan in the hopper for over a year for Lis to go to Cuba with a delegation of musicians whom she knows, one of whom has been there many times over the years. Speaks Spanish fluently, knows his way around, etc. 

And there's always been the possibility that there would be a place for me to travel with them. Just the thought of it has been making me anxious for that entire year and suddenly, there's an opening for sure and it's next week and I could go.

I can go.

After I spoke with Lis, my heart going, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no..." I took a walk.
It was a horrible walk. I found someone's debit card. I saw a dead snake.

Pretty little king snake. It started to rain a little. The streets starting steaming. It was so hot. Sweat was pouring off of me. It started raining harder. I came home. 
I'd gotten an e-mail from the guy who's in charge of this whole delegation to Cuba. He's in another country right now but he sent me a flyer of the trip. My heart was already starting to say, "What if? What if? What if?"
I looked at the flyer. 
My heart started to say, "You can't not do this. You will regret it forever if you don't go to Cuba with Lis."

I got in touch with the man in charge via e-mail and then he called me. 
In the three hours since then I've downloaded and filled out documents and printed them on my neighbor's printer because mine doesn't work. I've found my passport. I've called Lis. I've promised the man in charge that unless some dire event happens to me or someone in my family between now and next Thursday, I will be on the flight from Miami to Cuba. 

Cuba. I am going to Cuba. I will be staying with Lis in...a place. I am not sure about that. Not a hotel. A room. Somewhere. In Havana. The shows Lis are playing in do not begin until 11:00 p.m. Did you hear that? I go to bed at 10:00 every night. There will be tours. There will be meals. There will be drinks. There will be...CUBA!

If. Of course. If, all of my documents get to the right place by the right time. If I am approved. If I don't die of anxiety before then. 

I have been feeling on the verge of passing out ever since I got home from that walk. 

What do I need to do now? Outfits? It's going to be hot. I'll take all my linen dresses. Also, my Rolling Stones T-shirts. Will that be allowed? I signed a form saying I won't buy drugs or do drugs or criticize the government or engage in prostitution. Among other things. 
Okay. No problem. I won't do any of those things. 
I need a book about Havana. I don't know anything about Havana except cigars and old cars and amazing music and, that. 

It'll be fine. One small step at a time. I'm going to do it unless there are glitches which disallow it. 

Meanwhile, it's Jason's birthday. We're going to supper tonight to celebrate that precious man, that amazing father, that wonderful husband.

All right. That's all. For now. 

Can you believe this? 
I can't. 

Love...Ms. Moon, who is quaking in her boots, her blood, her heart


  1. I am so glad you decided to go. Anyone I know that has been to Cuba has loved it.

  2. Yay!!!! It's going to be wonderful and I'm so happy for you! I understand your anxiety but it will all be fine--obviously it was meant to be. Lucky you!

  3. A debit card, a king snake. What an interesting trip you're going to have.

  4. Holy fucking shit! That's awesome!

  5. Oh, I'm so happy for you! You're going to fall in love with it like you fell in love with Mexico. Didn't the Stones just play there recently?

    There will be dancing, and rum. Lis will look after you. Put your anxiety in a bag and a set it on a chair next to you. Pat it now and then. Other than that, lalalalalalalala.


  6. Very exciting and nerve wracking at the same time . Get ready to eat a lot of rice and beans .

  7. OMG! My heart is bursting with joy for you! Let it in Mary, the light and joy of this exciting adventure. You and Lis will make memories to last the rest of your days and hopefully we will all get to go along with you. I am thrilled and I want you to be also. Got every thing crossed that it all works out!

  8. How exciting! I'm so glad you said yes!

  9. OH MY FREAKING GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!

    v. excited

    ps. present coming to you via post Saturday.

    X O

  10. Oh that is fantastic! While you are there, wave at Jamaica just to the south for me. Excited for you!

  11. I'm thrilled for you! Hope the anxiety will be overtaken by pure and sheer excitement! Keep checking things off of that *to do* list and next week will be here in the blink of an eye. Oh joy!!!!!
    Susan M

  12. How thrilling, I am so happy for you! When i saw the snake pic I immediately started saying the rhyme red touches black good for Jack, red touches yellow kill a fellow. Gail

  13. Oh this is epic! Can't wait to read about it here. I'd be shaking and quaking too.

  14. Wishing many happy returns of the day to Jason, and Bon Voyage to you!

  15. Holy crap. I'm thrilled for you.

  16. You are a badass, and so is Lis.

  17. I can not believe you're going to Cuba. You are impossibly fortunate to have this opportunity.

  18. This is beyond cool ~ can't wait to hear all about it!!!
    You and Lis will have the adventure of a lifetime!

  19. As a Canadian, Cuba has never been restricted for me. My husband and I have been once, just the two of us, and once with our two children. We did not spend time in Havana, but instead were at resorts. Airports are fine, but the poverty of the country could be seen as we traveled by bus to our resorts. At no time did we feel unsafe. Any people we met there were friendly and gracious. A friend of mine stayed at a very small, not "swanky" resort which was closer to Havana. She and her boyfriend spent a day in which they hired a local man (and he brought along his brother who spoke better English) to drive them around in his old car and show them the "real" Cuba, and Havana. She loved it and from her descriptions, I think if we ever go to Cuba again, we should take the time to see Havana and really discover the country, rather than the fantasy life that resorts provide. I think you will be just fine, and have a sense of massive accomplishment once you come back home. I also feel anxious before going anywhere or doing new things, and sometimes really have to push myself. I'm glad you decided to go! -Jenn

  20. Cuba sent doctors and medical students over to Mozambique. Amazing people and good friends. It was devastated by the US blockade. It isn't all about tourism, it is about surviving and socialism. Eyes wide open?

  21. I'm so excited about this trip. You won't regret this decision. I know this is not in your comfort zone, but it will be wonderful!

  22. OMG! I'm so excited for you! Wish I were going with you!!!
    Take lots and lots of pictures...
    I have been carrying around a tiny pkg for you. Getting to the PO has proved remarkably difficult. Most of them don't have parking lots big enough to accommodate our house!
    I will endeavor to persevere!
    love and hugs and buen viaje!

  23. WOW!!!! How exciting! This is so awesome! I would LOVE to go to Cuba. And yes, you're right -- you can't not do this. I'm so glad you're pushing yourself because this sounds like one of those rare opportunities of a lifetime.

  24. Ack! I love you. It's so fucking hard to do the things that we feel we cannot do, but also so fucking amazing when we do them, even if sometimes they are just waking up. You inspire me, always. I'm so glad you are going. I'm thrilled. I guess maybe I can have a friend over this weekend if you can go to CUBA! love you mucho. Hope it feels more exciting than daunting and scary. Hope you have some xanex just in case. xo.


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