Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Repairs, Falls, and Sorrow

Well. Today was a today of repairs and crashes. Okay. Merely one crash. Not even really a crash but a humiliating graceful fall which was not really a fall but sort of a fall in that I did hit the ground.
More on that later.

The dentist got me in and he took a look at my tooth. Part of a filling had come out and he said, "I can patch that right now." And he did. The novocaine, the filing down of the old silver, the insertion of "compound", the tap-tap-tapping. The open wider. And it was done and there you go and there I was, numb and happy.
Tra-la, tra-la, I felt like trilling, and because I had accomplished something so very difficult for me without much pain or problem, I decided to go visit my young friends at the Computer Doctor and get the screen on my iPhone replaced.
Oh dear. I cracked it weeks ago, just a tiny crack, but still- and I had not wanted to tell my long-suffering husband but I pulled up my big girl panties and did and he texted back to ask me to please have them put a screen protector on it as well, and I did, and in thirty minutes- that was done too!
I went to the library and the grocery store. Which is where the almost/sort of fall occurred.
I was hurrying out with my cart and it had been raining and was wet and there are these big white stripes in the parking lot which I KNOW my old crocs slip on and before I could even remember to be careful, I had done a half-split and was on the ground with my right leg stretched behind me, my left leg under me, and my hands still on the bar of the cart!
You know. Falls are so weird. I mean- you have just enough time to know that you're falling and then it is done and there you are and of course your first instinct to is to jump up and declare, "I'm fine, I'm just fine!" and do a little twirl perhaps, and settle your skirts and proceed on with your day.
I am too old to jump up and I did not twirl but I did haul myself up and settle my skirts and wave my I'm okay! to the guy in a car behind me and proceeded to my car and unloaded the groceries and I was okay. I am okay. Simply fine. I may be a little sore tomorrow but no damage done, except to my aging sense of any dignity and that may as well be kicked to the curb while we're at it.

When I got home I put everything away and took a little nap because I had undergone so many stressful experiences. Haha!
Mr. Moon is on his way home and a friend is coming over to watch some FSU basketball on the TV and I have made chili and bread is rising and salad greens are picked and I have the damn darn air conditioner on again because it is still as muggy as a frog's crotch and too warm too.

I have tried to write about Tamir Rice but I cannot. I simply cannot. I don't feel that I have a voice which is worthy to do that. All I can say is that I do not know why I was born in this life, given this skin color which has allowed me to live in the way that all people should be allowed to live which is without fear that neither I nor my husband nor my children will be shot and killed for no reason by someone who will suffer no consequences.

And so, even as I feel so very fortunate in my life, my protected life, I cannot help but feel the great sorrow and pain that so many others, by mere accident of birth, must suffer.

Let us try to be kind. Let us not forget. Let us make whatever changes we can through our daily lives. Let us see each child as our own, let us reach out our hands and say, "No. This is outrageous. This is not right on any level whatsoever."

Be well, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. Glad you're okay, dear Mary. I have had such falls and they are such weird slow motion moments. But all is well, thank the stars. I love you.

  2. My fall at work sounded very similar and I thought I was fine but I was not and it took 3 months to recover. Slips and falls are tricky because we think there can't be all that much damage.

    I was also born with the shade of skin that has allowed me to do so much. And I have food in my cupboards, clean drinking water and access to healthcare. But it is those who don't live this life that causes me so much anxiety and depression. It is hard for me to feel joy with so much going on in the world. People tell my that I can't do anything about it and therefore shouldn't let it break my heart but I think if more people were bothered by it all things would change and the world would be the beautiful place it is capable of becoming.

  3. I usually feel happy leaving the dentist too, a strange high. I hope you are not hurting today. Gail

  4. I'm glad you're OK after your fall! That's scary! It IS weird how they seem to unfold so quickly and yet, weirdly, so slowly. Like any accident, I suppose.

    I am not paying attention to news at the moment. I know I should be but there's just too much going on! So I have yet to catch up with the Tamir story.

  5. Yes. To all of this. The good and the horribly wrong. You say it so well.


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