Friday, November 1, 2013

The Wind Is Talking Big In The Trees

It's gloomy and doomy here today, wind picking up and a gray sky. I woke up to almost no pain after four solid days of thinking I couldn't bear it much longer and I have no idea what makes this pain come and what makes it go. Yesterday was horrible until I laid down for about forty-five minutes and something happened in that time and it was so much better when I got up and then today, the same.
So I took my walk and it was a completely different experience today than it was yesterday and I just give up on trying to figure it out.
But I sure am grateful for the break.

It looks like rain and maybe we'll get some. We need it badly. The dirt is powder dry and the plants are drooping. Seems like forever since we've gotten rain but I know it hasn't been that long. The temperature has gone up and it feels more like late summer again than fall.
This is the way of it. Get the heater fixed and you need the air conditioner.

It also seems like forever since I've had the house to myself although I'm sure that's not true either. But still, I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. I seem to be able to fill up the time with nothing much and end up not doing a damn thing that I think I will do if I get the chance. I feel itchy and twitchy and unable to commit myself to anything which requires me to stop moving. Maybe it's this weather. Maybe it's worries, whether justified or not. Maybe it's the fact that Dia de Los Muertos is upon us and it's just a slippery time in the universe when unseen doors crack open to allow the dead to come and go. I have no idea but I do know that I would not mind being in Mexico where altars for the dead are everywhere, tables filled with food and candles, with flowers and beverages, with images of the deceased. There is a sense of humor and joy about it all there, and the cemeteries are busy with people sweeping and cleaning and preparing for the celebration to come.

I miss Mexico.

But here I am and not in pain and that is a very good thing and whether I decide to sew or write, to mop or nap, it's not going to make one damn bit of difference in this world. I think that when you spend your entire life at the mercy of everyone else's schedule, it is very difficult to grasp the concept of doing something that makes you yourself happy when you do get the time.
Or maybe I'm just a lazy ass with zero motivation.

Oh, let it rain. Just let it rain and I will feel more at ease.
Or so I think.

Happy Friday, y'all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. Thank the goddess for a no pain day (s).

    XXX Beth

  2. Pain sucks. Good for you that it's stopped.

  3. I am glad that your pain has vanished, constant pain is absolutely distracting. Enjoy your rain - I hope it does rain for you! :)

  4. I am glad you are not in pain today. It sounds awful when it comes over you. I hope it stays away forever. Sweet Jo

  5. Well I can certainly relate to reaching your limit with pain and itchy twitchy unease. I'm glad you woke up feeling better. I try to go to sleep every night visualizing waking up ok. Last night my fit bit says I woke up 18 times and I watched the clock from 3:30 until almost 5, trying to stay calm and breathe and not add stress to the mix. It's hard damn work, isn't it?

    I've always liked the idea of Dia de Los Muertos, it makes so much more sense than our rituals. I also know what you mean about not knowing quite what to do with down time. I may be a lazy ass too, or maybe just too tired to undertake the next thing.

    I hope your rain is a soothing one. We're in day two, and it's been lovely, but it can leave now.

    Happy Friday to you. I'm going to try to read this weekend. It's good to have goals. :)

  6. It's so hard to just do nothing. But sometimes just being is more useful than all the busyness because it lets you go within and recharge. No need to feel guilty about that. I'm glad to be here. Recharging.

  7. I am not trying to change the subject at Heart. I Thought you might kinda like this song I just heard.(Yes I am slow on things,If you have heard it ignore me.) If you haven't check it out. "All Kinds of Kinds" by Melissa Lambert. I am a Rolling Stones, Areosmith Lady,I gotta admit some of this new country ain't so bad.Thanks for listening,Ms Moon. Thank You for just Being Hear/Here... :)

  8. Beth Coyote- And it may BE the goddess. I sure don't know.

    Bob- Yep. Agreed.

    Jenny Woolf- And it's exhausting.

    Sweet Jo- Well, I'm not counting on forever but I'm happy for the moment.

    Mel- It IS good to have goals. I agree. My goal for the weekend is to clean out the junk drawers. So far, they have gone undisturbed. I think if I had one of those fitbit bracelets it would make me crazy.

    Angella- I wish I could just get rid of guilt. I am pretty sure I'd be a lot better off.

    mary i- I do love Melissa Lambert. Good song. Billy turned me on to her. She's something special.

  9. Sounds good to not have pain. I just took an Advil so perhaps that will help.


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