Sunday, June 10, 2018

Another Birthday And It Is Fine

I find myself a fishing widow tonight, all alone although not really. I have the chickens and the cats and they are good company, although the chickens will be going to bed soon. I took that picture this morning to show you how long Hawkeye's neck is. She or he (and I have no idea) is also turning the most beautiful colors. As you may recall, I seriously debated buying the four Jungle Fowl that the Ace Hardware in Crawfordville had but they were the only four chicks they did have and when you drive all the way to Crawfordville to buy chicks, you might as well get what they have.
Which I did.
And I'm glad.
I think they will be very interesting birds to observe as they get older. They seem a bit wilder than the regulation breeds and they are quite lovely to look at, not to mention very much like small dinosaurs with their long legs and necks which charms me to pieces. Do we ever grow out of the love of dinosaurs phase? How could we?

So today is Hank's birthday and as I said it was to be celebrated at El Patron and we took over the porch and made ourselves at home which is what we always do. It was a very congenial group of family and friends-family. Hank had brought Lily one of those unicorn heads that you can put squirrel food in so that when squirrels eat the food, they appear to have unicorn heads. Like this.

One can only imagine the hours of family fun to be had, peering out windows to watch squirrels with a unicorn head. 
Owen immediately took charge of the head and when I started taking pictures, there he was in almost every one, photo bombing with that dang thing. 
Here was the first picture. 

And then this one.

I really don't think anyone had a clue. 

Okay. Maybe some of them did.

His beautiful mamacita.

August and Maggie were oblivious. 

August was glued to his Boppy for most of the meal. That boy adores his grandfather more than I can tell you.

He is a thousand times more affectionate with him than he's ever been with me and instead of making me jealous, it thrills me. Big Boppy and Little Boppy. Curtis Glinden and August Glinden. When Boppy had to leave a little early to get himself on the road for fishing, August came to sit with me and then he realized he hadn't really told his grandfather good-bye. "I want kiss Boppy!" he said, and I said, "Okay, don't worry! We'll catch him!" and I set him on my hip and Gibson came with us and we got to the parking lot before Mr. Moon left and kisses were given. And hugs as well. 

It really was a very fun birthday lunch and I was so glad to see all of my children and their loves, not to mention all of my grandchildren. I got to hear about May and Michael's trip to St. Augustine and I got to catch up a little with my ex, Hank and May's bio-dad. Gibson and Owen are still NOT QUITE SURE about how that all works. We have explained over and over again. I mean- there's nothing to hide. This is the way it is. And they've known Jerry and his wife Lucia since they were born but I think that it's simply impossible for them to imagine a time when I was married to a man who was not their Boppy. 
Hard for me to imagine too at this point, but it happened. 
I knew a woman who had two children and they were maybe about the age that Owen and Gibson are now and she told me that they did not have a clue that she'd been married before. I was aghast. "Why haven't you told them?" I asked. 
"Oh, well. I will someday," she said. 
All I could think was that when she finally got around to it, it was going to be even huger than it would have been if it had just been part of the family knowledge. 
Well, they were her children and it was her family but in my experience, family secrets always eventually come out and it's never good when they do. Just the very fact that something is untalked about and hidden gives it way too much power. Kids know that something is going on. They always do. And that just adds up to a human being who will never feel as if he or she can trust his or her feelings, not to mention those he or she loves. 
Okay. Rant over. 
Bottom line is that I told Gibson that Hank and May have two daddies and two mommy's and that's just the truth. Jerry's wife has been a wonderful stepmother and her family welcomed those two kids  with no reservations, just as Mr. Moon has been an amazing stepfather and his family never saw any difference between the kids their son sired and the kids he took on as his own when he married me. 
When I say that our family is lucky, I mean it and it's true. 

So Rachel made Hank a delicious ginger molasses cake and we sang Happy Birthday and the waiter brought Hank first one regular shot of tequila and then a shot glass the size of a juice glass of tequila and I'm pretty sure that he and Rachel and May and Michael and various other friends are still down at El Patron drinking increasingly vibrant drinks and having a very good time. 

I stole this off of Facebook and all I can say is Ay-yi-yi!

Forty-two years ago I was in my own bed holding my very first baby and as absolutely peacefully ecstatic as any woman on earth had ever been. I had not slept for two nights, hadn't eaten in 48 hours, my eyeballs had broken blood vessels in them from pushing, my throat was raw from the insanely primal growling I did when I was doing that pushing, and my baby, my sweet redheaded baby was in my arms, diapered and clothed in the soft things I'd prepared for him and our friends came over to bring food and visit. And one of the daughters tickled Hank and talked to him and made him laugh. 
My less-than-twelve-hour-old newborn laughed out loud. 
I knew things were gonna be okay. 

Today, more than once, as chaos ensued and a unicorn head was being inserted into pictures and people were laughing and drinking and eating and holding babies, someone said, "This is all because of you."

And truthfully, I did have help. My name may be Mary but as far as I know, I have never had an immaculate conception. In any sense of the word. 

Here's my figs. I've never seen my tree so full of fruit. 

And here's Mick's back end. His tail feathers are growing back. 

And here's a video of Levon eating oatmeal for the first time. 

And here's a Gibson story that his kindergarten teacher told Lily:

It started raining one day while the children were in school and one of the kids said, "Maybe rain is when God is crying."
And then another kid piped up and said, "Or maybe it's when he's taking a shower!"
And then Gibson put in his two cents.
"Maybe it's when God is peeing!"

Yep. That's my family.
How I love us.
Happy birthday, Hank. Thanks for being born and making me a mother and teaching me more about life and humans and love in general than I could possibly have learned any other way. You are double the age this year that I was when I birthed you and you helped me grow up as much or more than I helped you.
I sure do love you.
And I have a strong feeling that you're laughing out loud tonight, surrounded by people who love you too.

All right. That's the news from here on June 10, 2018. Forty two years ago I could not possibly have imagined a day like today. And yet- here it is- grandkids, kids, chickens, figs, true love, internet and all.

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. Wishing many, many happy returns of the day to Hank!

  2. Whew! What a day! Gibson's God peeing idea is funny - he sure is his own person! I've never understood why people don't get everything out in the open. Secrets rarely end up being a good idea. I of course realize I probably share too much sometimes but I don't care - facts are facts, and there is no reason not to get on with things.

    1. Well, we all do have secrets. That's just life. But these family issues- well, come on. My family of origin was one secret after another and the toxicity was murderous.

  3. What a fun, fun day! Maybe God is peeing! Such a clever mind Gibson has! Big families are great! August loving up Boppy and feeding Levon, all so precious. Hank celebrating. I’m just happy for all of you!

    1. It was really fun. No one had to raise a finger except for the restaurant and they were getting paid and also Rachel, who made Hank's cake this year which was awesome. It gave us all a chance to just enjoy.

  4. oh my! I'm almost speechless at your beautiful family.......Happy Birthday Hank! And I must say Boppy is *hot*......(LOL) but your ex is also to die for. Great taste you have! Your day sounds lovely and I enjoyed it vicariously........and your jungle fowl is/are spectacular! I can't tell you how much I love sharing and enjoying your life....every day.
    Susan M

    1. Thank you, Susan! I'm so glad you're here every day.

  5. I love every word of this and every picture and especially Owen with the unicorn head. Such joyful whimsy. Beautiful family. Everyone there for Hank. ❤️

    1. Everyone there for Hank. And so happy to be. The other day Maggie got upset about something and out of the blue she said, "I want Hank!" which cracked me up and also made me smile.

  6. Replies
    1. I really enjoyed this one so very much. Thanks for planning it that way, Hank. I love you so.

  7. I couldn't type enough beautifuls to do justice to this post. Just beautiful!

    By the way, I told my sons that I'd been married before when they were about five and seven years old. We were driving in our minivan, and I remember looking in the rearview mirror at their surprised faces. Henry asked me why I'd gotten divorced, and I told him that we were just too young. Oliver asked me whether I had any children, and for a split second I felt the POWER. Of course I said, "NO!" but I toyed with the idea of saying "Yes! And I left them, too, because they weren't nice to their mother." I hope anyone reading this who doesn't know me will know that I would NEVER say anything so cruel to my children, but it IS a funny story.

    1. Oh my god, Elizabeth! When we were driving home yesterday, I had Lily and all three of her kids in the car and as you know, boys of their age can drive the driver and any other passenger in the car to distraction. "He's touching me!" doesn't begin to describe it all. I had activated the "ignore" mode but every now and then their insanity broke through and I literally almost said to Lily, "You know, I really wish there was ONE thing at least that you could threaten them with that would make them be quiet for ten minutes."
      I think you just gave me the answer to that one.
      I adore you and how your mind works.

  8. I'm so glad Mick's tail feathers are returning -- although, MAN, they look weird.

    I haven't seen one of those unicorn heads before! Isn't it hilarious that someone came up with that idea and marketed it and now they're being churned out of a factory somewhere? I mean, really. People are so funny. I kind of want one.

    You are so right about family information. I have a cousin who was adopted by my uncle, and he and my aunt just never got around to telling her. She found out from a neighbor when she was in high school, and I am not kidding when I tell you it scarred her. And how could it not? I never understood why the family structure wasn't made plain to her from the beginning.

    1. I'm pretty sure you can get several different types of squirrel-feeding heads. You should do it!
      I had a friend who grew up knowing that he was adopted but what he didn't know was that his "sister" was actually his mother (she'd gotten pregnant at a very early age and was shipped away to have the baby in shameful secrecy) and that his adopted mother and father were actually his grandparents. He didn't learn about this until he was in his twenties and by then, he was pretty messed up and he's had mental health challenges his entire life. Severe ones. He'd always felt that people were talking about him behind his back and had already been diagnosed with paranoia before he realized that in fact, people had been talking about him behind his back his entire life. Not good. Not good at all.
      Mick's tail feathers do look weird but his naked butt looked weirder.

  9. OMG, sweet tears filled my eyes while reading this post ~ the love that flows through your family is palpable and beautiful to behold...Happy Belated Birthday, Hank!!!

    1. We're a goofy, funny, loving family. It works for us!

  10. Oatmealing like champions!

    Happy Birthday to Hank, what a great day.

    1. Every time I hear, "I feeding Brudder...Daddy," I just almost die.

  11. I love your beautiful family! Happy Birthday to Hank! XXXOOO


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