Friday, April 2, 2021

The Traditional Good Friday Post But Condensed


 Well, as I always say on Good Friday, Happy Day They Crucified Our Lord!

And then I generally proceed to tell the story of how my younger brother was mesmerized by the soprano with the huge bosoms and amazing vibrato who sang "Were You There When They Crucified My Lord?" in church when he was about four years old, his eyes as wide as interplanetary flying saucers as he stared up at her trembling breasts, stunned by the sounds coming out of her mouth. I shall never forget.

Next I traditionally go into my Easter rant about how ridiculous it is to believe that The One True God needed to send his only begotten son to get tortured and crucified to save us poor pathetic humans from our sins in order for us to have eternal life. I carry on a bit about why The One True God only had one begotten son when he could have theoretically had billions and then I question how the act of being crucified and then resurrected from the tomb could possibly save us and allow us to have eternal life and generally end with the fact that if you are not interested in eternal life the whole thing seems pretty bizarre and confusing.
There's more but that's the summation, I suppose. 

Then I frequently segue into how the miracle of rebirth in nature every spring is more than enough for me and I see no need to dwell on a bloody crucifixion or believe in resurrection when there are such things as wisteria, magnolia blossoms, baby chicks, beans breaking the ground with their tender sprouts and sending out tendrils to grasp the fence, and so on and so forth, to see with my own human eyes and love with my own human heart.

You get the gist. 

I've gotten into a bit of a FB row today which started out about enslaved people in the history of our country which led to a further argument about a god being in control of everything so...
I'm not sure what. 
Enslaving people and forcing them to build everything and grow everything and tend everything and then moving on because a god ordained it is okay?
So I'm not being entirely lackadaisical in my (obviously ordained) task of educating the masses and consider it a compliment that I've been called an "historical fool." Now if I could only be called a fucking atheist, my day would be perfect. 

Actually, my day has been pretty perfect. It's been so cool that this morning when I was hanging sheets on the line my hands froze! It's not gotten up to sixty-five degrees all day and the sky has been as blue as in the picture above that I took of my Japanese maple. Jessie brought the boys out and they helped Boppy do something with what Levon calls HIS race car and I got to read them some books and Jessie went and got our lunch at the Hilltop and she was in a good mood too so she and I giggled a lot. She and August helped me kick bamboo and I showed August my tiny newborn Buckeye and he said, "I think you already showed me that," and I apologized because I'm sure I have and I doubt he was that interested the first time but he was so polite about it. When I was reading them a Richard Scarry story about how Mister Mouse and Mistress Mouse got married, Levon turned to me and kissed me full on the mouth which cracked me up so much. I think that love makes him happy. 

Another thing which has made me feel cheerful is the way the new rug looked in my bathroom this morning when the sun was shining in so brightly. 


I do believe it would be a good idea to do some de-cluttering there, don't you? 

And so the day has sweetly passed and it's almost martini time. Tomorrow I will make a cherry pie and on Sunday afternoon all of the kids except May, who has to work (on Easter Sunday?!), are coming out and there will be an egg hunt and a ham (be still my heart) and some greens and rolls and deviled eggs and whatever anyone else brings, not to mention sequined dragons and so forth, and that should be fun. There will be masks but it will all be outside and like Gibson's birthday party, it will feel a little bit normal. 

The traditions continue as they should. 

Happy Friday, y'all. 

Love...Ms. Moon



39 comments:

  1. As a woman with formerly huge bosoms I can tell you that they never not once ever did they tremble. But little boys remain little boys forever even if they’re god’s son. Happy Good Friday!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okay. Maybe there's a little poetic license there. But part of the lyrics of the song were "tremble, tremble, tremble" and so...
      You're absolutely correct about little boys.

      Delete
  2. Oh dear, another Good Friday has rolled round and I am still no wiser about this Christianity thing. What on earth is the point of it all? Being a "fucking atheist" sounds like fun.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You fucking atheist! and i kiss you full on the mouth!
    Your bathroom is desire-able!
    I put two things in my cart, johnny WAs, thought of you, and then I exed them because what am I thinking??? Instead i bought cheesecake to send to son for Birthday. Is that a better way to spend cash?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You silly girl. Life is short. Buy the Johnny Was.

      Delete
  4. i am making a HAM as well. it's HAM because it's like 20 pounds of precooked, sprial sliced what-the-fuck-are-we-going-to-do-with-all-this-ham esp since i don't even like it other than in bean soup or split pea soup.......... tony is going to smoke it and we'll see how many ways i can serve ham to prove my true worth as a housewife...we don't even celebrate easter but it was on sale at aldi so here we are....

    xxalainaxx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ham is the most important part of Easter for me. I WISH I didn't love it so damn much.
      You can freeze portions of it to cook with beans over the year. I think that's an excellent thing to do. And you do not have to prove your true worth as anything, my dear!

      Delete
  5. I think i have rug envy. I’ve searched high and low for a decent rug around here and they don’t exist. I’ve looked on line, but like you, it’s hard to buy something i can’t see in person.
    Happy sunday to you and your beautiful family!
    Debbie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I like it a lot. I feel lucky to have found it.
      Happy Sunday to you too!

      Delete
  6. We have a lot in common - if I lived next door I would be your eternal friend and we would laugh a lot together!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And Maurice would scratch the hell out of you.

      Delete
    2. Mr. P. is possibly right although as far as I know, Maurice has never scratched any neighbors unless of the feline variety.
      I'm sure it would be nice to have you as a neighbor, sillygirl.

      Delete
  7. I could never call you a fucking atheist, but have no problem with atheist, just like moi.
    That rug just fell down perfectly in there. You really needed it in your bathroom.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Thank you. I needed that summation. I'm getting a bit worn down here in Florida surrounded by earnest Michiganers. One asked me what we were doing for Easter,(since of course the whole world celebrates Easter, doesn't it?)and I explained that our kids were up north and had both married Jews anyway. A long moment of silence followed and I relented and said I'd bought a ham.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That made me laugh so hard! You've bought a ham- so yes, you are absolutely celebrating Easter.

      Delete
  9. they always go on about how Jesus suffered and died on the cross for our sins as if no human had ever suffered as much as him. well, he wasn't hung, disembowled, and then quartered or buried in the sand with just your head sticking out by an ant bed or had all the skin stripped off while he was still alive. dragging a cross around and then getting nailed to it seems like a walk in the park compared to some of the torturous things humans have done to each other.

    that is a great rug. I got rid of two of the three small area rugs around here. I got tired of having to clean the cat and dog hair off them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are so right about the suffering thing, Ellen. I was listening to a woman talking on NPR about losing her faith after watching her brother die of AIDS and how his suffering was so much greater and took so much longer than Jesus's did.
      Not going to have dog hair on this rug- no dogs. And the cats mostly stay out of my bathroom so not too much worry there.

      Delete
  10. I love how you managed to write your typical Easter post while pretending not to. LOL!

    Even when I was a kid sitting in church, Christianity made no sense to me. Religion in general, really. I think the only reason my mom took us to church was to make my grandparents happy.

    Your bathroom -- including the rug -- is so beautiful! Much better than ours!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, dang, Steve. You saw what I did!
      Can't fool you!
      My mother always said that she went to church so that she could sing in the choir. I don't think she believed much of any of it.
      I do have a beautiful bathroom and I know it. It's my own little kingdom.

      Delete
  11. You are such a great writer, Ms. Mary Moon! You often say what I am thinking but you express it so much better than I could.
    I was raised Catholic but looking back now, I wonder how I ever believed all the stories and folklore that was passed off as fact?! I jumped through all of the stupid hoops of rules and guilt!
    Now I just have my own beliefs and just try to be kind to others.
    Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your love!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, it's pretty easy to indoctrinate very young children although the smartest ones figure it out pretty quickly. But not before they suffer a lot of that stupid guilt for breaking stupid rules that are impossible not to if you're a human being.
      Being kind is what it's all about.

      Delete
  12. I think so much of organized religion is inexplicable, maybe because it's a contradiction in terms.

    I still observe the corporal and spiritual works of mercy, largely because it's about taking care of other people, and doesn't get into church going, which I don't.

    In other news, that us the biggest bathroom I ever saw. I think my townhouse would fit into its footprint. The rug is exactly right for it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm with you on religion. And it is quite possible to be a spiritual and merciful person without believing in a god. In fact, I think it means more if there's no god telling you what you HAVE to do for some future reward.
      It's a pretty big bathroom. I keep my clothes dresser in there!

      Delete
  13. I think of your house as a storybook house and that bathroom picture sure fits! You live in a magical kingdom and tomorrow your grands will get to roam and play in that kingdom in search of eggs. What could be better. As for the proselytizers, they need to just be quiet because they've used their evangelism to embrace Trump so they have no credibility whatsoever. I like your argument about Spring.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I love my storybook house and it is a magical kingdom. I think the children all feel that way about it. There's always plenty to look at and more places to explore.
      Absolutely about the proselytizers. They've created more atheists than anyone else, most likely.

      Delete
  14. A sequined dragon beats a chick or bunny, hands down.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I'm not religious either and so am more than happy to see spring as the blessing that it really is. As for that rug and that bathroom - oh my word, so pretty, both of them!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes! Why go into some artificial construct about a miraculous resurrection when the real thing is happening right in front of us? I don't understand it.

      Delete
  16. Happy chocolate egg day, from one fucking atheist to another. Though to be honest, there has not been much fucking going on here lately.

    While you’re asking, please inquire why god couldn’t just forgive us. Also, why wanting to have knowledge of good and evil was a sin in the first place. Seems like a good thing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You made me laugh, Annie!
      None of it makes any sense, does it?

      Delete
  17. Decluttering is only necessary when you start climbing over things to reach the door. Or, that's the way it works for me, even though I do, actually, try to declutter. Your bathroom is lovely!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I'll just sit here and drool a little while longer over your large and beautiful bathroom. Cluttered? I think not. Perfect. -Kate

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh! But it is! I should do a sort-out and put-away.

      Delete
  19. Speaking of the Christian bible stories ... I was watching a video interview this morning with a First Nations elder, who said that calling the stories of the elders "myths" and "legends" (in the English translations) was misleading because although the stories weren't/aren't factually true, they give truthful lessons. So right! and maybe some of that is true about the Christian bible stories too? Anyway, not to argue with anyone about the b.s. that Christian fundamentalism has become; just throwing it out there. -Kate

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, Jesus supposedly spoke in parables and I see the sense in that and I sense the truth in them. But when you get to these stories about the resurrection which so many millions of people have built their entire lives and belief systems around, it's very hard to see any sense in them. At least for me.

      Delete

Tell me, sweeties. Tell me what you think.