Sunday, April 11, 2021

Here is the pantry project, coming along. I am so excited. Mr. Moon asked me a few days ago if I want him to paint the shelves white or just stain the wood. 
"No." I said. 
"No. I want you to paint them red. Or blue. Or green would be nice."

I think we are going with a dark green like his bathroom. Oh! The smell of fresh wood and new paint! It's going to be lovely. 

The sun has just come out here in Lloyd. It has been raining for days, it seems and although I do love the rain and almost never complain about dreary days, it is a sweet surprise to see the sun again. The wisteria leaves are doing a fluttery dance in the breezes, the wind chimes are tinkling. 
Do you remember wind chimes like this?

The tinkly crystalline song they made?
And they were ridiculously cheap. A few bucks at most. They are so rare now as to be unavailable. I miss them. 

For quite a long time now, Mr. Moon has been having shoulder pain. He's been to the doctor. He's done physical therapy. He's had x-rays. And it's only getting worse and worse so his doctor finally sent him to an orthopedist who, after examining him tentatively diagnosed a torn rotator cuff and ordered an MRI for confirmation. 
Mr. Moon does not have a good history with MRI's. Turns out he is extremely claustrophobic and he was not looking forward to getting another. But today was the day it was scheduled and the doctor did prescribe him two Valium to take forty-five minutes before the procedure which he did and he was fine. Or at least that's what he told me after it was over. 
We'd had an easy day and he'd done a little more carpentry work and Jessie and the boys came out and I read to those little guys and Jessie helped her daddy with the sawing of boards. I read the boys a library book which is from a series that August is currently in love with. It involves robots and bad-guy unicorns and somehow the planet Uranus. Is Uranus still a planet? I've lost track of that particular situation. Somehow there are also characters in the book who love to eat sweets including a princess, but like I said, August loves them and Levon seemed entranced too. So we read that and then we finished the Richard Scarry book and then we read Levon's choice, "Murmel, Murmel, Murmel," which is about the sweetest book ever written and which I love to read because there are so many different voices. Levon is such a funny guy. Jessie sent me this picture this morning.

The child got up this morning, put on his new clothes and boots and went outside to unstack and restack the firewood. 
For whatever reason. He's such a BOY and yet, he's so tender and sweet. 
Another picture of them I got last week was this one.

They were at the library and August asked Jessie to take this picture. "It looks like we're getting married," he told his mother. 
That boy just loves love. 
They both do. 
I remember when Lily was about to have Gibson, and Owen, who was about Levon's age, maybe a little younger, started fixating on being married and having children. His "wife" was a stuffed orangutan with some incredibly fancy name which I have forgotten. All of the other stuffed animals were their children and he loved them dearly. 
How beautiful it is to see these children go through the beginning discoveries and feelings of what it means to grow up, to love, to take part in the traditional rites and rituals, to be parents. Some of you may even remember when Owen pretended to be my father and he would take care of me. It was lovely to witness his version of how his father fathered him with such care and devotion. 
I was reminded of all of this when Maggie was here and on Saturday morning, a little while after she'd gotten up she said, "Oh! I have to wake up my darlings!" meaning, of course, her baby dolls. 
Her darlings. 

One of the most amazing parts of being a grandparent is how we have the time and the distance to be able to truly appreciate these things. Parents don't have the luxury to really stop and ponder the small and tender things their children do. They're too busy feeding them, sheltering them, trying to teach them, discipline them, ensure that they are growing up healthy and strong and sound and potty-trained. But we grandparents- we can stop, step back, and cherish. 
If we are lucky. 
And I am. 
And I do believe that in doing that we are important in the children's lives too. And when we tell their parents what we've noticed about how lovely their children are, we are giving them some much-needed acknowledgement, support, and love as well. Which parents don't get nearly enough of. 

So that's my little perspective today. And perhaps an explanation for why we grandparents are all so incredibly convinced that our grandchildren are the most amazing children in the world. That is our job. To recognize that yes, they are, and to praise the children for being so, and to praise their parents for raising them to be so. 
Yet another example of evolution. Grandparents who are not only physically but also emotionally involved in the rearing of their grandchildren contribute to their chances of growing up, which of course will hopefully result in those children passing on our genes. 
Unconscious selfish behavior. 
Mother Nature, as I have often said, is a tricky bitch. Her tools include hormones, lust, love, and the need to protect our young. 
It's always worked for me. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. My grandmother had those chimes in glass, and they made the most wonderful sound. I'd forgotten all about them until your picture. I remember going to her house for some holiday, and immediately upchucking. I spent the remainder of that day in her darkened bedroom, listening to those chimes.

    1. Oh, poor little Debby, throwing up at your grandmother's house. I'm sorry that happened but at least there were windchimes to listen to.

  2. Lovely thoughts about parents and encouragement. I agree parents, particularly mothers, get far more criticism from all sides than praise. I do like to try to right the balance where I can.

    1. Balance is always important. You are so right.

  3. This is beautifully said, Ms. Moon. Having no children nor grandchildren myself, all I can add is that my grandparents (especially my grandmother) were the Best Ever (though I think you and Mr. Moon would come in a very close second). They were so important to my young life, and remain entwined in my heart though gone for decades. So - thank you, grandparents all!

    Chris from Boise

    1. I love hearing how grandparents stay in people's hearts their entire lives. They are special, aren't they? They have a definite place in the culture of the family.

  4. I told my daughter often that my grands were living proof that she’s a good Mama. Once I said they were a reflection of her love and she said that she learned it from me. How sweet! As for rotator cuff, my orthopedist told me last week that I need surgery (after xrays and the dreaded MRI). I’m gonna wait until after I turn 65 in August. My current (crappy) insurance would have me paying $5000+ for the surgery and physical therapy. Is Mr. Moon having surgery?

    1. We'll have to see if this is indeed a torn rotator cuff. Mr. Moon would really like to avoid surgery if at all possible. We shall see.
      And that was very sweet of your daughter to say that and I'm sure it's true.

  5. This is why I come here; you are a lovely antidote for all of the fear and anger and horror in the world. Thank you Mary.

  6. That's a very good analysis of life as a grandparent! It is amazing what kids learn and how, through play, they model and experiment with certain behaviors. I laughed at Maggie calling her dolls her "darlings." Wonder where THAT word came from?! I do not remember wind chimes like those.

    1. You don't remember those wind chimes? I know they had them when you were growing up. I think the last ones I bought was in the eighties.
      Yes. Maggie calling her baby dolls her "darlings" just charmed my heart.

  7. I'm pretty certain you're right about grandparents. My Welsh granny (the only one I ever knew) was a cold, distant woman and I think that made MY mom into a lovely, cuddly grandma. Dad too of course - he was dotty about his grandkids. My little Munchkin is only 2 weeks old but I'm already so in love!

    1. Sometimes we become the parents we wished our parents had been and I think that can be very healthy. We reparent ourselves, in a way, as we parent our children.
      I love that you have a grandson now. I know you must be head over heels.

  8. Good advice for grandparents! and people in general when you think about it! Be encouraging! Tell others that they are terrific!
    Thanks, Ms. Moon!

    1. Be encouraging! Yes! The older I get, the more apt I am to compliment people- even strangers. Why not? It's good for all our spirits.

  9. All of our Grandchildren ARE the most Amazing Humans in the World, and those Two Boys, Adorable, Smart and so Funny! I know you're absolutely bursting with Pride, as you should be! I have Grandparented both Grandkids I didn't Raise... and a couple I did Raise... and it's True that as a Grandparent your Style of dealing with Children shifts to a greater Appreciation, more Encouragement, and just having Fun with the Young. I try never to get so Old that I forget what it was like to be Young.

  10. How wonderful are these grandchildren! I love their thinking. Our grandchild has created this new word, to gentle, as in we must gentle this kitten or let's gentle this crying child.


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