Saturday, May 11, 2019

Let's All Just Drink Bloody Mary's And Lay By The Pool

Today was a very big day. August and Levon both got their first real, professional haircuts by our beloved Melissa. August actually asked for this to happen. I think that he got to thinking about how pretty Melissa is and also, about that drawer where she keeps lollypops and that led to a boy wanting a haircut. August does love candy and he also loves the pretty women. This is just how it is. All of my grandsons gaze at Melissa as if she were a work of art that they can hardly believe they have the good fortune to be in the same room with. 
As well they should. 

We trooped into the familiar room where the magic happens and where the candy is stored and where the box of toys is kept. August went first. First he and Melissa did the "well, what do you think you want?" part of the appointment. August mainly wanted her to use the little trimmer. He loves that thing. Melissa said that all of the kids love it. Beyond that, August wasn't sure except that he wanted it shorter. 

Oh, look at those curls! It seemed sort of a sin to cut them but it's just hair. 

So curls got cut and the trimmer was used. 
Levon watched very closely, as he does. 

Then it was his turn. He sat on Mama's lap and Melissa gave him a lollypop. He sat as still as could be. 

She didn't cut much of his hair. Just enough to get him familiar with the process. Melissa knows what she's doing. 

And guess what? I didn't even get a picture of both of the boys after they were shorn. Or trimmed. I was too busy taking note of August's deep pleasure in eating his first ring pop. Levon gave me bites of his candy. 
"Ta-too," he said if I forgot to tell him thank-you. 

Jessie wanted to buy a few things at the make-up store and so we drove over there after the hair cuts and I sat in the car with the children (Levon had fallen asleep) and read books to August while she got a moment's peace to find what she needed. And she did. 
And then, glory of glories! We went to El Patron where Melissa met us and the boys spent the entire lunch flirting and vying for her attention. And doing a little running around. And eating some food. 
It was so nice. 

I will tell you that today has been another "what's the point?" day. Even with grandboys' first haircuts. Even with Mexican lunch with them and their mama and Melissa. This may or may not have something to do with Mother's Day. 
Just throw the word "mother" out there and I tend to go into a crazy state. 
Other ugly beasts have raised their prickly heads recently and sometimes I just get so tired of it all. Why in the world is it that something that happened over fifty years ago still has such a deep grip on my heart, my throat, my mind, my gut? 
I've given up trying to figure that out. I just know it does. 
One does get exhausted, though. At least I do. 

But this is fun- yesterday when I was with Jessie and Lily at the river, we were talking about Mother's Day and what they wanted to do for it and when they both got quite honest, what they really wanted was a break. A little time away from being a mother. 
Now anyone who has ever had and raised children understands this. I myself have had some wonderful Mother's Days spent away from my children. Flowers and brunches are fine but Lord GOD Almighty, give Mamas a little space and time to remember who they were before they became mothers. 
So I don't recall who suggested it first yesterday when we were talking but what started out as sort of a joke ended up being a plan. 
The girls have decided that what they really want is to spend the night in a nice hotel with a pool where they can drink wine, watch whatever they want on TV and get some real, true deep and uninterrupted sleep.
Sister-Mother-Friends on mini vacation! I encouraged that plan with all of my heart. 
"Do it!" I told them. "Just do it!" 
And it's going to happen. 
Their daddy, who knows how hard it can be for mommies, is paying for them a very nice room and I hope that this becomes a tradition. Those sweet girls have even asked me to join them which I appreciate with all of my heart but I want them to have the whole time, the whole space, the whole BEDS to themselves. As a mother, I am definitely on inactive duty these days and I get a good night's sleep every night and besides- they may need to talk about things they wouldn't talk about if their mother was around. 

So that makes me happy. 

Mr. Moon is out in the garden even though it is after seven. He's been working outside so hard all day long. I am going to make him a good supper although it won't be as good as last night's. I made a sort of bastardized version of Salade Nicoise which looked like this:

It was quite possibly the best salad I ever tasted. The arugula, greens beans, carrots and eggs were grown or laid right here and it was amazing.
Sometimes I do hit it out of the ball park. Sometimes I do get it right. 
For example- when I married that man. 

Happy Mother's Day to all of us who are mothers and to all of us who have nurtured. 
Sex and gender are no determiner of that nor is fertility or age. There are plenty of people who have nurtured students, patients, clients, the arts, artists, friends, co-workers, spouses, partners, dogs, cats, wild birds, gardens, parents, nieces and nephews, the planet, and/or whatever they have encountered which needed nurturing, tending, and loving. I dedicate Mother's Day to all of them. To all of us. 
Go do something nice for yourself. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. I hear you Mary with my whole gd heart.

  2. The dentist we chose when it was time for my sons to go also spent the entire appointment just showing them his tools and giving them rides in the chair, and how smart was that! The youngest was only two years old and when he had his first real appointment, no one could believe how well he behaved. My boys loved going to the dentist! He was one smart cookie, as is your boys' hairdresser. -Kate

  3. oh no, those curls!!! everyone strives their entire lives to have curls like that! Better than gold, I hope you picked them up to save in the "BOOK". I have just about every haircut of my youngest son's hair in the "BOOK". Along with baby teeth, and weird stuff like the first scab...yes, It is the best "BOOK", probably ...ever! You always have the best days, so glad you take the time to write them down! I love your life!

  4. I am so child clueless I had to look up ring pops. Oh, my. I wish they had those when I quit smoking. The most popular flavor is is blue raspberry, closely followed by watermelon.

  5. I can not get over those curls! August has such pretty hair. So does Maggie. Cute, so cute.

  6. Happy Mother's Day to you Ms Moon. Thank you for all of your years of nurturing us, your readers. Knowing there are smart, kind, empathetic, no bullshit people in this world helps to sustain me. And when I visit your blog I get to see these attributes in you, in your family and friends, and in your readers and their comments.

    1. What Jill said, I can't say it any better!

  7. What an absolutely fine plan your girls have hit upon for mother's day! i hope your day is slow and peaceful tomorrow.

  8. YES, what Jill said! No bullshit here, just real, true life and love with all the stuff that goes along with it. Sometimes it’s shining delight, sometimes it’s painful truth (and many times it’s both!) ~ but it’s always fine and insightful writing. Mary, I can’t imagine my life without your daily musings in it. Happy Mother’s Day!!!

  9. Well, the boys look like they handled their haircuts with aplomb. Some kids are scared by first haircuts. I love the Mother's Day plan! Wouldn't it be disappointing to many of the world's children to know that what their mothers REALLY want for Mother's Day is to get the heck away from them? LOL! But moms do need some grown-up time, for sure. Your salad looks yummy!

  10. Another lovely post. Shame there is no photo of the shorn lambs. One line made me spring to attention - "Why in the world is it that something that happened over fifty years ago still has such a deep grip on my heart, my throat, my mind, my gut?"...That is a notion with which I can very much identify. I thought I was the only one to still feel historical moments so viscerally - as if they happened just yesterday.

  11. that sounds like a great plan for your girls. as for bloody marys...gak. nastiest things I have ever tried to drink.

    1. oh, Ellen......I don't believe you have had a perfectly made one, then! I hate tomato juice with a passion......but a perfectly concocted spicy Bloody Mary would change your mind!!!!!!!!!
      Susan M

  12. Happy mother's day to you dear Mary. What a brilliant plan your girls have devised and yes, I think it should be tradition. Much love.

  13. Those boys get more handsome every day. Have you ever read anything about the after effects of childhood trauma? That would help answer the question you posed to yourself here, I thinkCheck out Bessell Van der Kolk. I like your girls and your plans...


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