It's All Just An Excuse To Make Fun Of Mitt Romney. And Talk About Keith Richards

All right. I just watched Madonna's halftime performance via the miracle of the internet. I couldn't be bothered last night. I was running lines.
Anyway, the old gal looks fine and I sure wouldn't complain if I looked half that good. She seemed a little stiff, didn't she? Like- had to push herself up off the floor once or twice. I will say that no one on the planet can writhe/dance on the floor like she can.
The woman has a gift!

Now me. I'm stiff today myself. Garden work will do that. But you know, I'm older than Madonna. How old is she? Get this- I just went to Google and typed in "How old" and before I could finish, I was given about fifteen billion websites telling me that Madonna is 53. I'm 57. I tell you what- I gotta give it to her. I doubt I could walk in those boots she was wearing, much less dance in them.

Still, I think it must be easier to be a man-celebrity. Keith can get away with looking a thousand years old at the age of 68 and we all cheer him but if Madonna dares to look over forty at 53 we tut-tut.

Ain't right, ain't fair but then, Keith never made his bucks because of his looks while Madonna...well. She's not THAT good of a singer. Or songwriter. And don't you talk to me about Keith's Richard's voice. He can sing his songs anyway he wants. And so can Madonna, of course, but as far as I know, she's never once played the intro to Jumpin' Jack Flash.

(Where'd he get that coat? I want that coat.)

So where was I? I don't know. I took a break to go take the trash. Took a break from trash talk to deal with the actual stuff. Somehow, that makes me want to talk about this picture again:

I just love this picture. Old Mitt and the Wifey, doing their laundry. I know this horse has been beat to death but come on! I just want to kick it one more time. He said something really stupid about it like- he and the wife do their own laundry because who else is going to do it? They have to do a month's worth at a time because that's how long they're on the road.

If they did a month's worth of laundry in those machines, they'd be in that basement (I guess it's a basement- it looks like a basement) for three days. Any person in this world who has let his or her laundry pile up for a month knows this is pure-T bullshit. What a crock of shit. Thirty days worth of holy Mormon underwear alone would take at least an entire night to do.

Okay. Enough. Let's let that horse rot in peace.

I'm just wasting time here anyway. I've got a week ahead of me that would make Madonna's pretty head spin. I wonder how much it costs her a month to keep those incredibly beautiful golden locks of hers looking like that? My new hair color cost $5.99. It was on sale at the CVS. I like it pretty much.

All right. Here's one more picture of Keith.


He's not too bad on the floor either, although he doesn't do much writhing. Hard to writhe and play guitar at the same time, I would imagine. He's got a grace all his own, that Keith does.

Thanks, y'all. I was a little anxious this morning but being able to talk about Keith made me feel better. It always does.

It's like a little prayer. No floor-writhing or holy underwear required.

Love...Ms. Moon