Wednesday, August 10, 2022

Chemical Patience

 Well, today was back-to-school day and of course we all got the requisite photos of our bebes dressed up and ready to go, excited and probably glad to get out of the house and back into the world. Maggie and Gibson are still in the same school but Owen is going to a middle school so Lily has her hands full with transportation. Have I told you that Owen is in mostly AP classes again this year? That is a smart boy. As are they all. When Maggie went to meet her teacher, it was a woman who had substituted some for her class last year and Lily said she hugged her up and said, "Magnolia June! Do you remember me?" And of course Maggie did. 

Here's the Weatherford pictures. 

Dropping off August at his school. 

Daddy toting Levon home to drive him to his school. He'll be going to the same preschool he went to last year but he's going five days a week this year. Half days, but still. He is so ready for that. Jessie said that August told her that his new teacher is less bossy and that first graders are a lot quieter than kindergartners. I am sure he appreciates both of those things. We are a family who carries the trait of having a bit of a hard time with too much sensory input. 

I had quite a day. I didn't feel that well when I woke up but I was determined to get to town and do my weekly shopping. I went first to Costco and then, having a craving for falafel, decided to go find some for lunch. I do not make falafel, figuring it best in some cases to let those who actually know how to do something be the ones to do it. There were two restaurants relatively nearby who serve middle Eastern food and I chose the one closest. When I entered the place (just a very small cafe) I realized that everyone there was waiting for food. I should have taken that as a hint but no, I stepped up to the counter and ordered my falafel gyro and a side order of dolmades and then sat down and began to peruse the NYT's site to catch up on the news. 
After about an hour and a half, I had read all the news that was fit to print and then some. I also finally got my food. Turns out that there was only one woman (the owner) working and I get that but why the hell she didn't tell me that it was going to take up to and into infinity before she could get my order ready? 
I do not know. 
And why didn't I just leave?
Well, you know how it is- you've already paid and you keep thinking that it can't possibly be that much longer and is. 
Luckily for everyone concerned I had been experiencing a great deal of anxiety before I went into Costco and actually took half of one of my very small Ativans which I keep in my purse for just such emergencies. I was starting to have the physical symptoms that I sometimes get when I am in a bad way and did not want to have a major experience in Costco. These Ativan have been in my purse for so long that I wasn't even sure they had any strength left in them but if all I got was a placebo effect, it worked enough that I did not lose my shit at the restaurant. 
There was a woman there who came in and while she was waiting on her food, I told her that I'd been waiting for well over an hour and she said, "Well, maybe you'll be really hungry and will be able to eat it all!" 
"That wasn't the goal," I said to her. 
And then she enlightened me by telling me that sometimes, when things like this happen, it's because we need to slow down and it can end up being a good thing.
And despite being pretty chill, even at that point, I said to her, "I don't believe that. I mean, you can MAKE it into a good thing but I don't believe that the universe has anything to do with it and sitting here for an hour and a half reading the NYT's online hasn't really improved me that I can tell."
So that was rude of me. She was obviously a glass-is-half-full type of lady though and asked, "How is that? Reading the Times online?" 
"Uh," I said, "It's easier and always available?" 
Bless her heart. Bless mine too. I didn't bitch at the owner but she may have spit in my food anyway. The falafel was okay but the best falafel in the world would hardly have been worth that wait. And the dolmades had obviously been nuked. 
So. Cross that restaurant off the list. 

I got through Publix without too much of a struggle and then, because I am an idiot, chose a route to come home on that I KNOW always has traffic backed up when the schools' let out and once again, the crumbled half of Ativan got me through it without my blood pressure shooting through the roof and I did learn something today and that is to pay attention and think things out more logically both in restaurant and route choices. 

So it goes, so it goes. 

All of this is just first-world-problems and I remembered that for real and for sure when I was waiting at a light and a man who was covered in sweat was panhandling. I had a dollar bill and gave it to him. I wish I'd had more. People do not panhandle in Florida summer heat if they have any other way on earth to scrape up enough money to eat. He didn't even have a hat but used his cardboard sign as a small sunshade, holding it above his head. 

So yes, a strange day but here I am now in my air-conditioned house with a kitchen and pantry full of food, machines to wash my clothes and my dishes, technology and the ability to sit here and type this and send it out into the world. 

I just heard a sound like a gun-shot and then a slow cracking. I waited but neither felt nor heard a crash so some giant branch has broken but not yet hit the ground either because it did not break entirely or it was caught by lower branches. I think I'll go check out the situation. 

Love...Ms. Moon


  1. It is good to remember how abundant our lives are - and how others are so often not the same. I often find that tension hard to sustain; I'm proud of what I've achieved and the work it took to get there - but at the same time I'm conscious of the privilege that success confers. I guess there is a balance to be struck.

  2. I'm still stopped at kids being back in school! August10th. A month early. Or earlier than here anyway. I mean August is a vacation month! Till after Labor day. Culture shock here!

  3. I hope that you survived checking out the situation. It could have been a drug-crazed fugitive on the loose. As for waaaaaaaaaaiting in cafes and restaurants. That has to be one of my top pet hates. When the food finally arrives, I never really enjoy it - no matter how tasty it might be. Trip Advisor is a good place to vent justifiable annoyance about very long waits. English kids won't be going back to school until September 5th.

  4. i'm glad the kiddos got off for their first day and thankful for purse xanax. xxalainaxx

  5. I haven't been sleeping much so I found some old ativan in the cupboard, from when Katie had her biopsy. I'm not a fan of benzos but they work. I'm hoping I can sleep again before too long.

    I'm sorry your day sucked. Sending hugs and love.

  6. Too early for school but I suppose it is to balance the snow days, right?
    I do not have your patience- that is way too long to wait . I went to get Katsu the other evening and waited way too long for anyone to take my order, walked home and had soup. It was delicious. By the way, I am watching Banner of Heaven on hulu- the book was gob-smacking and the series even more so- - the mormon god is a complete jerk!

  7. I have some old valium from a long deceased cat which I use when I get like you did. Do kids not wear school uniforms there? I love their happy faces. Definitely ready to go back to school.

  8. glad grands back in school......a bit early? 2 more weeks here before school starts. Shelf life of drugs is thankfully much longer than *predicted* so good for you and Ativan! I would NOT have waited that long for food......I would have departed.....paid or not, sorry. And no, you were not rude to the *glass half full* woman. You spoke your truth! May your evening be quiet and calm with birdsong and frogs croaking and chickens *talking*
    Susan M

  9. As early as it seems to restart school, I think neither parents nor children are complaining.

  10. The kids all look happy, I hope they have a good year.

  11. It's been decades since I heard a tree branch pop and then break, I was at school, in class and at recess we all rushed out to see which tree it was, hoping it wasn't our favourite climbing tree. Definitely cross that restaurant off the list. The kids all look happy to be back at school.

  12. Owen in AP classes? Not one bit surprised. How chuffed all the babies look to be heading back to school. Hard to believe it’s that time already. As for your day, it was definitely a rather surreal one. I like to imagine you happy in your cool serene home after all the sensory input of the outside world.
    37paddington here.

  13. Our government is cutting back on everything. Having had some days over 100 deg here in England (which is NOT set up for it in the slightest) I am full of pity for anyone out in the Florida summer heat. We have friends who were born and raised there and spent the summers outdoors on the farm and they still wonder why they live in Florida when the summer comes. (of course we love to visit them there in the winter months, it seems like paradise to us).

  14. Gosh the kids are already back to school!!! When do they break up - early July?

  15. There are several broken off branches hung up in my trees, well caught. The kiddos all look happy to be going back to school. And I don't know if I'd been that patient, waiting an hour and a half for my food.

  16. Also, what a great photo of Virgil and Levon! That's going to be a precious memory for that happy little boy. (This is 37paddington again. No idea why google isn't recognizing me!)

  17. Gosh, the summer flew by for those kids! But they do look happy to be going back to school. My oldest grandkids hate school and are not looking forward to going back AT ALL. They are 15 and 17 and can't wait until they can stop going to school. I feel bad about that. I hope they can at least finish high school.

  18. Don't walk under the trees! (I know -- that's impossible in your yard.) Hard to believe that summer is over for the kiddos but the photos express their excitement at going back. I wish I was that excited!

    I have mixed feelings about glass-half-full people like that. On the one hand, I admire their positivity. On the other, it can be damned annoying.


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