So I rustled up my walking gear and put it all on and told myself that I'd only walk two miles, just two miles, come on, anyone can walk two miles, that's nothing, etc. etc. etc.
I talked myself into making it three miles because what's one more mile? Huh? Nada. And I did it and I hated every step of the way.
It's just so fucking hot and humid. I know you're tired of me whinging about this. I'm tired of me whinging about it. I'm a lot more tired of living in it.
Later on this afternoon I went out and picked some black-eyed peas and cream peas and I felt like I was going to die, like my internal thermometer had been set at thermonuclear and also I got ant bit and it was all so horrid that when I saw a giant Georgia Thumper grasshopper I didn't even try to stomp him but just let him go on about his business which is the destruction of vegetable plants.
"Eat everything!" I yelled at him. "And then I won't have to mess with this shit!"
I just feel completely disconnected from myself lately. I don't even know who I am anymore. We all tell ourselves stories about who we are but lately I've been feeling like I don't even have the energy to tell these stories, much less act like I believe them.
I might even just go ahead and put on the polyester housecoat and sit on the front porch with a bottle of gin and start screaming obscenities at everyone who goes by my house.
Not really. I'm afraid of my front porch right now. You should see the damn spiders.
The other night I was on the back porch and realized I was looking at the largest dragonfly I'd ever seen. I went and got my husband to show him.
"Wow!" he said.
It really was big.
This picture does not begin to show the gigantic proportions of the thing.
We decided to try and gently catch it to let it outside.
That insect, confusing our concern for malicious intent, bit us.
Yes. A dragonfly bit us.
I didn't know that this was even a possibility but having just spent seconds on in-depth google research, I see that it is.
We did get it out where it flew into the night, supposedly, but within a few moments, it was back on the porch.
"Deal with it yourself," I told the motherfucker.
I guess he or she did as I haven't seen a corpse although it's possible that Maurice ate it.
Crunch.
Here's Jack.
He did not move from that spot on the bed from 11:30 last night to 2:30 this afternoon when I forcibly forced him off in order to make the bed.
What's up with that?
I heard today that male lions "relax" for 20-22 hours a day. I guess Jack is just channeling his inner lion although actually, I had no idea that he would voluntarily go that long without eating.
Isn't this a fascinating blog post? Don't you wish I'd write more about religion or politics? Or at least sex, drugs and rock and roll?
Yeah. Me too.
Okay. I will.
I have no religion.
Politics suck.
Keith Richards.
See what I did there? Keith encompasses all of sex, drugs, and rock and roll. Just in case you didn't get it.
Ooh boy. I can't wait until Owen starts reading my blog. And the poor child thinks he knows me now.
Love you, Owen!
Love you, too...Ms. Moon
I like having to go no further, Keith sums it all up pretty much. I am still stuck in his early years, in London, and re-read it before pressing on. I love his childhood and young adult life, I lived in London close to the same time, remembering being poor, everyone was.
ReplyDeleteGot no bugs here, Mary, the temperature today is 79 and there is a breeze, come on up.
Oh, Ms. Moon. The heat is making me cranky and discombobulated, too. And, without the humidity. The move down 4,000 feet has not helped my disposition as I wake up swollen up every morning and not rested because we are living next door to a 4-way stop. And the elementary school across the street starts tomorrow. So, the next post from me might be that I am going to kill myself!! I feel your pain, Ms. Moon. So, let's just love on each other, long distance. K?
ReplyDeleteI think you could call LOVE your *religion*........... that is how I perceive it. I didn't know dragonflies bit? WTH? Ungrateful insect. And I'm with you on heat. I hate it and it's been between 90-100 every day past week.......and due to continue until this weekend when it *cools* by 5 degrees. No A/C.......but many fans. We're just not used to this in coastal Cali............. it makes me cranky as shit
ReplyDeleteSusan M
Twice last week I set wasps free. Then one stung my husband. Oh, it’s on baby. Bring it, bitches. I am going to kill them now just for sport.
ReplyDeletegive the spiders some gin. problem solved!
ReplyDeletexxalainaxx
You know, I agree with Susan’s comment above. LOVE is your religion and I’m in it with you. And Keith Richards. He’s everything, isn’t he? I wish we could run away somewhere and just sit, maybe watch a river or an ocean, with a cool breeze coming through. I have a feeling we did that in a past life. Who knows?
ReplyDeleteThe heat can really make life more than difficult - it can make you sick. Do take care of yourself, you hear?
ReplyDeleteThat’s what my dogs do for me: make me walk. Twice a day, 3 miles, mile and a half each way and back, 6 miles s day.
ReplyDeleteI'm cranky too. I feel like breaking something. I walked for an hour today and thought I had heat stroke. I'm tired of the heat. I know, I will regret these words, assuming I will remember which is a whole other story, come November.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm especially tired of opening up the news and seeing what stupid fucking thing Trump said today. It boggles the mind.
I'll join you on the front porch and we'll take turns having swig from the bottle of gin. But no housecoats...it's too hot for those right now. I'll be wearing an old tie dye tank top with no bra because again, it's hot and who cares anyway? We can get drunk and curse and swear and throw bits of food to the chickens and talk. Deal? :)
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the languid and self-deprecating tone of this blogpost. Somehow it captures the weight of the heat and the humidity in southern states at this time of year. It must be hard to be sharp and upbeat in such a climate. English people will often bemoan our weather but there is a lot to be said for its characteristic freshness and indeed its unpredictability. We never know what we are going to get but to a large extent you do!
ReplyDeletethe heat just makes me light headed sometimes. it's 8:30 and 80˚ out there though it's just supposed to get to 92˚ today. which is relatively cool compared to the 98˚ and 99˚ we've been getting. also, we got a little rain yesterday morning early. I'm just hunkered down in the house, making short forays outside. and yes those dragonfly fuckers do bite! I picked one up off the ground that was dying to put it higher up on a plant and the little bastard bit me!
ReplyDeleteI imagine the heat and bug is enough to make anyone dissociate. Bleh. Cold is way better. The darkness is grim, though.
ReplyDeleteBeing yourself, never mind your best self, takes a lot of energy. I don't know what the fuck I am anymore either.
I can sympathize re. the heat. I'm staying in the a/c! I might try to walk myself this morning but it's going to take herculean effort. I love the image of you in the polyester housecoat with the gin and the obscenities. And no, I have NEVER heard of a dragonfly biting a person. How ungrateful!
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeletegood post!!!
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