Sunday, January 3, 2010

Got To Go


It's Sunday and the blues are in my pocket and I haven't seen Owen since last week and I have rehearsal this afternoon so I am going to rocket into town to see that boy. Mr. Moon is going to babysit him this afternoon for a few hours while Lily and Jason are at work and I'm at the Opera House so I have to take this time to go get my fix, my sense of peace, my sugar, my heart, my joy.

I woke up cold, both feet and soul and the chicken water keeps refreezing. Betty and Carol are hanging out together and we ate some of our hen's eggs for breakfast with grits and bagels and let me admit it here- bacon. One piece. I had one piece. I swear. Breakfast warmed me up but not enough. I have to go see my grandson. I had dreams of long-dead friends and that shit freaks me out and so I want (need) to go see my boy who is very much alive and remind him of who I am. The chickens are fine, Mr. Moon is fine, the dogs are fine, I am sure that Owen is fine but I can hold him while his mama does some laundry or whatever it is she needs to do. I am sick of making soup and it isn't helping and I cleaned out the refrigerator and so what? and we took the tree down and put the stockings and Bad Santa away but none of that fed me, not even the bacon, but I know what will.

And after I get his sugar I'll go to Monticello where I'll play with Jack and Jan and Colin and Marcie and Pat, and Kathleen will get to be the boss of us and that, too, will feed me.
Hey! When you're hungry, you have to feed yourself.
And sometimes soup won't do it.

I'm off.

Be good. Feed yourself if you're hungry. That's all I have to say.

13 comments:

  1. Doesn't it take a lifetime often, to know what feeds us really, and then to just go GET it? Good for you for knowing, for going. Thanks for feeding us first too. You look after your chickens and your readers so wonderfully!
    I'm craving a spinach omlette today. But I know I need that other kind of food you speak of, the kind soup won't touch.

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  2. Reading a book that I think you might find interesting... It's about being in the "zone" as they say. It is researched based despite it's fruffy subject matter.

    Sniff that boy for me... speaking of which, I saw Billy and a current picture of Waylon! CUTIE!

    Call me when you get a free minute.
    xo

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  3. I find it interesting that the subject of my meditation this morning was about self-care, knowing that the only person responsible for taking care of us is ourself, and boy, isn't that the truth?

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  4. I hear you about waking up cold, it's like 14F here today. The lows are somewhere near ZERO!!! Yikes!

    Except, last night I woke up (wasn't really hot or cold..actually quite comfortable) and I was sweaty. My chest, back, sides.....a very wet and sweaty mess. It sort of freaked me out because I really don't sweat that much...even when it's hot. I'm puzzled....

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  5. I got to see Owen yesterday and he was in a fine, smiley mood.

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  6. I didn't have the blues this morning, but I sure have them now. Can't believe I'm about to say it, but I think it's time for me to go back to work tomorrow. I need the structure.

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  7. I've never heard words more truthful. Sometimes I forget to feed myself and I wonder why I am so angry. Haha. I hope I am in town to see this show you are working on.

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  8. I find myself with nothing to say for some reason. I just love, love to read your blog and will keep reading every single post of yours as long as you keep writing them.

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  9. I did my day backwards; if I had read this first, maybe I would have moped a bit less and spent more time reading in the corner of the couch.

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  10. why not bacon?? are you vegetarian??

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  11. Bethany- It takes all sorts of food, doesn't it?

    Ms. Fleur- We are blessed with the cute babies. I'll call you.

    Kori- Sadly, yes.

    Rebecca- Sounds suspiciously like a hot flash to me.

    DTG- He was when I saw him, too.

    SJ- And that is good.

    Melissa- I hope so too!

    Maggie- Well, just until I die, most likely.

    Nancy- I hope you did read some in the corner of the couch. Sounds lovely.

    Screamish- Oh hell no. But bacon? It's just not very good for me. But I do love the pig.

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  12. Funny. I'd been getting really depressed and then I realised I hadn't been writing. Now I'm feeding myself again.

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  13. Mwa- Don't forget that. No. You won't.

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