Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Morning Report

Ugh. It is windy and the temperature appears to be rock-dropping and starting on Thursday we're going to have temps in the twenties again and so, good-bye all you delicate buds. My Japanese Magnolia blooms of deep purple- I hardly knew ye!

The British Bake Off did not disappoint last night. I'm addicted to that show. The sweetness both of the sugary doughs and the contestants, the complete honesty of the judges, the picky-ickyness of it all. "You put the sugar in all three layers, didn't you?"
"Yes. I did." (The shame. Oh. The shame.)
The tent the bake off is held in, the beautiful little kitchen stations each baker has for his or her own. No slamming about of industrial strength stainless steel racks and screaming, "I need the deep fryer! Who's got the smoker? Who turned this fucking oven off?"
No profanity. Why this charms me, I do not know. I adore profanity but somehow, it would be so WRONG to curse in front of Mary Berry or Paul Hollywood although I feel sure that either one of them could swear a blue streak to put me to shame.
But who could swear in front of sweet, darling, talented, seventeen-year old Martha?


Not me, that's for sure.

Well, anyway, I am sitting here wasting time. I've got a whole house to clean or at least try to make look like it hasn't been abandoned. Oh, we have moved so far from Shabby Chic to simply shabby and are now entering the territory of Miss Havisham. Why do I not see all the chicken shit on the little kitchen porch until people are coming to visit? I swear to you, some people paint their house more often than I clean mine. Thank god I'm a good cook or I'd never get away with this housewife gig. 

So. On we go! Let us shoulder our toilet scrubbers and mops and fill our pockets with rags and furniture polish! Let us mix vinegar and Fabuloso without fear and try to create order where there is none. 

Let me get off my ass and get started. 

Love...Ms. Moon


12 comments:

  1. I cleaned my pig sty before bed last night, I was up til 1 a.m. I woke up to sparkling floors and a light heart! Now I have the day to play!
    The life of a housewife! Lol!

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  2. Wait, is there a problem with the Miss Havisham look? LET'S BRING IT BACK! I'm doing my part!
    xoxox.

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  3. Ahahahaha: 'Oh, we have moved so far from Shabby Chic to simply shabby and are now entering the territory of Miss Havisham'.

    I love it - though my house is more reminiscent of a voyeuristic programme about hoarders than mausoleum revenge chic, sadly!

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  4. Well, I'm eating chocolate covered almonds while I imagine you dipping your mop into a bucket. But I vacuumed everything yesterday, washed my sheets, and recovered the seat on a little chair. So. I wish you chocolate covered almonds tomorrow.

    And no, you damn cold snap! Go away. Do not ruin the darling buds in such a way.

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  5. We have the same look here, the Miss Havisham or borderline hoarder. It is amazing what can be done when company is coming. Gail

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  6. "Why do I not see all the chicken shit on the little kitchen porch until people are coming to visit?"

    The same reason why I don't see the cat hair until someone is two steps from sitting on the extra-furry chair ...

    I had to look up Miss Havisham in Wikipedia. I should take a second look at Dickens' work - it sounds like a good story. I just have so much trouble wading through his descriptions :)

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  7. There is no place like home. Yours is beautiful and warm.

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  8. I need to watch that show, don't I?

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  9. I'm one of about 5 people in UK who don't watch this show except when it's the celebrity for the Red Nose Day charity....tonight it's Dame Edna Everidge, Jennifer Saunders, Joanna Lumley and Lulu...game on!!x

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  10. They don't curse on British Bake-Off because the show airs before the "watershed," or the hour when things can get a bit more risqué. (I think it's 9 p.m., or maybe 10 p.m.) But at any rate, let me assure you that they DO curse on British TV. I think British TV is actually much racier than American TV.

    Did you see the episode where Ian threw out his ice cream dessert after another contestant (Mary, I think?) took it out of the freezer? It was a huge national scandal here! I can't remember whether that was last season or not.

    Hope the buds hold out through the cold. Plants are made to get through a cold spring. I always worry about them too and then they pull through just fine.

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  11. I thank my ill-kept house for my strong immune system. other than that, I'm waiting for this heavy fog to burn off so I can take some pictures at Frank's so I can post my post.

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  12. We will have to watch that show. Sounds very interesting.

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